


It's In The Water

by Jedinite



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2020-10-05 01:55:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 71,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20481002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jedinite/pseuds/Jedinite
Summary: Captain Janeway and Seven of Nine end up stranded on a planet together. What happens on this planet alters the course of their lives in both the Delta Quadrant and the Alpha Quadrant





	1. It's In The Water Part 1

It’s in the Water

“Seven, shouldn’t it be hotter?”

Seven glanced toward the other woman with a skeptical eyebrow. “It is precisely 92.7 degrees Fahrenheit or 33.7 Celsius, Captain.”

Janeway blew out a ragged breath. “Well, that is somewhat cooler than the shuttle’s readout.”

Catching on, Seven nodded. “I ascertained that it was malfunctioning,” she exhaled. “Aren’t you glad that it was erroneous? I believe frying an egg on the surface would be the term?”

Janeway grumbled some air through her lips. “And we’d be the eggs,” she quipped, as Seven nodded in agreement. “I just don’t understand what happened to cause our instrument to be so completely off.”

Seven didn’t even hesitate. “I would hypothesize that is what induced us to crash land on this planet, Captain. Since we have lost communication with Voyager, I estimate that our chances of getting out of here would be extremely improbable,” she informed. “In fact, I calculated the probability of exiting this planet to be one fourth of a percent.” 

Janeway sighed. “Thanks for reminding me, Seven,” she said wearily as she gazed across the barren land with despair.

Seven eyed the other woman and noticed how exhausted she looked. They had very little rations on them, although she was grateful for the little they did have. She knew it was on her to find something soon or neither of them was going to make it off this planet alive. Nanoprobes or not. She scanned the area once more and noticed the rocky mountain ahead of them in the distance and she hoped that there was some sort of plant life or anything that might aid in their survival.

“Let’s stay ambulatory, Captain.”

Janeway nodded. “Agreed,” she replied in a mouth that was dry. She stripped off her sweater and briefly thought about taking off her undershirt and just going the rest of the way in her sports bra but realized that wouldn’t be very professional. Besides, she would likely be burnt toast out here in this sun, or should she say multiple suns.

…..

Captain Janeway ached everywhere, and her lips were as chapped as the rest of her body felt. Her head pounded and she knew it was from the lack of water she was getting back into her system. She had her eyes closed as she rested back against the smoothness of the tree trunk they had finally found. The cool shade had felt terrific, and as she slowly opened her eyes, they immediately landed on Seven, who was still standing, tricorder in hand, scanning the area. She also noticed the other woman looked somewhat tattered; her perfect bun was now loose with strands of hair falling in disarray around her face. Janeway tried to swallow in a dry throat at the vision right in front of her.

She had always thought that Seven was a beautiful woman, but seeing her now this way, with her hair blowing in the warm breeze as the three suns began to set behind her in the sky, well, it literally took her breath away.

She must have been staring with a smile on her lips, because now Seven was smiling back at her. “Captain, according to my estimates, there should be a water source just around that outcropping of vegetation.” 

Chastising herself for ogling one of her crewmen, let alone her astronomics officer who was the one person who seemed to drive her crazy, Kathryn groaned internally before trying to get back on her feet. She must have swayed, because before she knew it Seven’s arms were around her and holding her steady.

“I got you,” the blonde voiced firmly.

Janeway closed her eyes briefly, letting her body absorb the sensation of Seven’s arms around her. Exhaling a long breath, she took a moment to pull herself together. “Thanks,” was all she could croak out.

Finally, the two of them made it another mile before Janeway had nothing left and began to fall from Seven’s slight grasp she had on her, but before she hit the ground she was lifted right into the former Borg’s arms. “Seven,” she grumbled dizzily. “What are you doing?”

“We are almost there, so I will transport you the rest of the way.”

Janeway wanted desperately to refuse and demand that Seven put her down immediately, but she did not have the strength to do so. She just breathed in the woman who she had secretly loved for so long but had to keep it hidden. Although she tried to stay awake, it was an exercise in futility as she finally closed her eyes and surrendered to slumber. 

Kathryn floated groggily with foggy awareness as her eyes fluttered open to see nothing but dark blue all around her, with hints of neon pink. Was she dreaming this? She blinked as she leaned up more, and right away she noticed she felt a lot better. A pink mist with greenish light radiated around the area, and she drew in her next breath carefully.

The silver material of their survival blanket was beneath her, mirroring the effects in the air. She soaked it in as the day's events returned to her, and slowly she tried to take stock of where she was.

She could hear the rush of water close by and it sounded like heaven to her ears as she got to her feet.

“Seven,” Janeway called out in a worried tone. 

Within seconds Seven came into sight, looking like something out of one of Janeway’s romance novels. If she thought Seven was a vision before, there was nothing in her vocabulary that would adequately describe what she was looking at now. “A goddess,” she uttered quietly.

Seven dipped her head as she gathered closer. “Captain are you damaged?” she asked anxiously.

Janeway blinked. “Actually, I feel pretty good.” She drew in a ragged breath. “Really, really good,” she whispered to herself as she looked away from the blonde. “What happened?”

“You lost consciousness, so I carried you here and situated you on the survival blanket, then I retrieved the water. Once I analyzed it and deemed it safe to consume, I helped input it into your system,” she explained. 

“Oh, I guess that is why I feel somewhat better,” Kathryn grinned.

Seven nodded and that’s when Kathryn noticed the relief that spread out on her   
face. “Captain, I have a fire going just over there, and I have acquired some of the local fish and have prepared it for us to replenish our energy. Would you care to consume some of it?”

Janeway now blinked with surprise. “That would be lovely, Seven.”

Within minutes, Seven handed her a wide leaf which held the meat from the fish. She tried a little sample before diving into it. “Oh,” she swallowed with delight, then began to devour the rest of it like she hadn’t eaten in weeks. “Seven,” Janeway began. “Um, uh, how long was I out?”

“Not long,” was Seven’s short reply.

Janeway wanted to roll her eyes, but she smiled instead. “Seven,” she said again, but with more authority behind it.

Seven put her meal down and looked straight at her Captain. “Approximately 4 hours 33 minutes and 17 seconds.”

“Dang, that long?” Janeway whispered to herself, unable to believe she could sleep like that for so long in a strange place.

“Your body required regeneration,” Seven told her softly.

Surprised, even though she knew she shouldn’t have been, Kathryn offered Seven a smile. “Heard that did ya.”

“I apologize if I overstepped, Captain.”

Kathryn brushed it off. “It’s alright.”

She picked up some more of the fish when Seven brought her over one of their old water containers. It was filled full of water that seemed to glow somewhat. “Seven?” she questioned with an incredulous brow.

“It’s safe, I promise,” Seven assured. “You have already ingested it, and I have taken in plenty of it as well. If it were unsafe for consumption, I would already be affected.” 

Janeway gathered a breath as well as the container filled with the strange looking water, then glanced back up at the blonde. “Okay,” she agreed, yet still feeling skeptical, she decided to smell the liquid first. Once she was sure it was okay to drink, she took another breath before taking a sip. It tasted clean and fresh and she felt its cooling effect as it slid down her throat.

“Whoa,” she said, licking her lips, then offered Seven another smile. “Well, let’s hear it for Borg ingenuity,” she complimented raising the plastic container toward her shipmate as if to toast her.

Seven smiled a bright smile at her and it seemed to light up the now neon sky. It made Kathryn’s heart soar into the heavens above them, along with the bright purple planet that loomed in the night’s sky behind her.

After dinner, Kathryn felt like she needed to take care of some personal business, so she softly excused herself. She was feeling terrific as she walked back to their little camp site. In fact, she felt like she was now ten years younger. She stopped in her tracks as soon as she noticed Seven by the water’s edge.

Seven glanced her way, but they stood in silence as they watched the waterfall slip over the rocks. “This is amazing.” Janeway finally said, breaking the silence.

Seven watched the other woman carefully out of the corner of her eye. “I concur, Captain.”

Janeway now shifted her gaze back to the younger woman, and the look she was getting from the blonde made her second guess what she was referring to.  
She cleared her throat. “You know, maybe you should call me Kathryn while we are stranded here. Since we both know that we have no idea when we will be leaving this surface, formalities seem unnecessary.”

“Don’t say that, they will find us,” Seven tried to assure the other woman, but wasn’t certain if she was trying to convince the Captain or herself. 

“I really hope so,” Janeway breathed. Bending down, she slipped her hands in the water and tried to wash the day off her, then proceeded to wash off her face. It felt wonderful, and she suddenly felt a strong urge to just peel off her shirt and slacks and slip into the water.

“Seven,” she husked, staring out over the small body of water.

“Yes, Capt…. Kathryn.” Seven tried it out and liked how it felt to say her name, almost like it just rolled off her tongue. 

“Is this water safe?”

“I already told you…. that it ….”

“I know it’s safe to drink,” Kathryn cut her off. “I meant is it safe to take a dip in?”

“You mean…” Seven hesitated as her blue eyes darted toward the water then right back to the smaller woman. “Yes, it is safe.”

“Sweet!” Janeway squealed internally as she quickly stripped down to her bra and panties. She felt movement beside her, and when she looked up, she just about nose planted right into the dirt at the sight right in front of her. “Seven,” she gasped. “What are you doing?”

Seven turned her head slightly as her naked curvy, beautiful backside began to slowly descend into the water. “I am complying with your suggestion.”

“But…but…you…. you’re….”

“I am what?” She turned around to face her, and just like that a very naked, full breasted Borg stood before one lonely Captain.

Janeway swallowed as she absorbed this woman…ALL this woman, then immediately turned her head and chastised herself. She felt her body shiver despite the heat spiking through her blood. “You’re naked,” she whispered shakily.

“That is an accurate observation, Kathryn.” Seven’s eyes narrowed in on the petite form turned away from her, and her pulse skyrocketed at seeing this woman so exposed.

“I just assumed we’d be in our undergarments,” she replied weakly.

Seven smirked as she backed more into the water. “I am,” she said softly.

Kathryn’s heart raced and she groaned internally. Desire slid up her spine as she clenched her teeth together. “Sss-ven,” she tried again, but it was muffled. A war raged internally inside her body, a war that was becoming harder and harder to fight. Taking in a tattered breath, she heard the water shift, and she knew she needed to just go with it.

You are a starship Captain, Kathryn, now act like it!

Gathering all her courage, she quickly shed the rest of her garments and turned and went quickly into the water without even looking where the other woman was. Diving in, she swam underneath the water, letting it quench every inch of her, hoping that this cool water would also quench the fire that seemed to fill her veins now more than ever. 

As she finally peaked out of the water’s surface, she gathered a much-needed breath and looked around to see if she could find a certain Borg. It didn’t take very long because as soon as she turned to look in the opposite direction, she was right there, watching her every move.

Startled, Janeway flinched. “Oh,” she gasped. “There you are.”

“I never departed, I have been right here the entire time. I wanted to ensure that you were satisfactory.”

Janeway flinched with the awareness that Seven had seen her naked. “Oh, yeah, of course you were,” she swallowed awkwardly.

Catching on, Seven gazed at her, her eyes serious. “No need to feel ashamed Cap…Kathryn. You are beautiful, put together flawlessly…. you are perfection.”

If she was being tormented before, this was absolute torture. She closed her eyes for only a moment to gather a breath. She wanted to correct this woman, tell her that SHE was the perfect one, but she lost all train of thought as soon as she saw the glittering pinks form small shapes around them. The lightening of them brought out the hunger in Seven’s eyes, and it rendered her mute.

As their bodies floated together, seemingly of their own accord, Janeway could feel her heart pounding furiously in her chest, the sound of the rapid beats loud enough to be heard in the night sky. She knew that Seven’s acute hearing would certainly hear it too, but then for a moment thought perhaps the blonde’s heart rate was just as accelerated as her own. 

Seven dipped her head back letting her hair slip into the water, causing her breasts to become even more exposed to Kathryn’s hungry eyes. She thought she might die right then and there. I’m in hell…. or maybe I’m in heaven.

“This water feels euphoric,” Seven noted, her tone soft. “Do you feel it as well?”

Kathryn swallowed. “I feel something,” she muttered in a low voice.

“My body has never experienced sensations like this,” Seven admitted, gazing right into Janeway’s eyes. “It’s unfamiliar to me. It’s immensely stimulating. I am uncertain as to the cause. I wonder….” Her voice trailed off as she moved even closer to the older woman.

It was as if there was some sort of magnetic force between them, a force so powerful that Kathryn was unable to move away, even if she wanted to.

“Oh,” was all she managed to get out, once again rendered speechless as anxiety and arousal battled within. Her heart beat impossibly faster as she found herself unable to take her eyes off the of woman in front of her, blue eyes locked into hers, with the same hungry desire that Kathryn felt in every cell in her body.

Unable to control herself, she reached out and grabbed the taller woman’s bicep. “What’s happening to us?” she breathed, her voice thick with longing. She pulled her even closer as she tried to catch her breath. The feel of Seven’s skin against her hand was hot to the touch, and it almost completely unwound the older woman.

Seven slowly shook her head as her tongue came out and swiped her lower lip. “I am uncertain,” she swallowed tightly. “But I do believe I am torn.”

Janeway felt her body shiver once again, and she knew it wasn’t because she was cold. “If it makes you feel better, I am as well.” She blew out a ragged breath. “I suppose I should do the right thing,” she voiced weakly. She knew that meant going back to shore, but the longer they remained naked in the water, and in such proximity, the harder it was to act. She could feel Seven’s breath on her face as they continued to gravitate impossibly closer, and at this moment, Captain Kathryn Janeway wanted to stay exactly where she was.

The water rippled with movement and she suddenly felt hard nipples slightly graze her own. Although she didn’t comprehend the logistics of what just occurred, given the other woman’s height, she really couldn’t think about that. The sensation was overwhelming, and she felt heat shoot through her body as a low moan slipped between her lips.

As if they had a life of their own, her fingertips lightly floated up Seven’s arms, which were now around her waist, holding her. Her fingers continued to whisper over smooth skin, pausing when she felt the muscles under her caress tense. 

“Relax,” she husked. 

Seven immediately complied, and Kathryn swallowed. Hungry for more, she traced her fingers over the metallic fibers and starburst implants imbedded in the silky-smooth flesh. Her hands danced over strong shoulders, then down the blonde’s back, lightly stroking as she drifted more into her arms.

Their moans mingled and echoed off the rocky ledges as they surrendered to each other. Tilting her head, Kathryn gazed into Seven’s eyes and felt a buzz settle against her heart. This was absolute ecstasy, yet it was not enough. She wanted more. Soft lips beckoned, inviting her to taste. At that moment, the decorated Starship Captain was spinning out of control. She couldn’t stop it, and she didn’t want to.

“Kiss me,” she commanded, her voice breathless and needy.

Blowing out a shaky breath, Seven gently placed her head down until their mouths were almost touching. “It shall be my pleasure to comply, Kathryn.” Finally, lips gently brushed together in a light, soft kiss that turned demanding as she covered the older woman’s lips completely with her own. Kathryn wanted to cry when those plump lips moved away, but before she could protest, she felt hot, soft lips tasting her cheek and chin before trailing down her neck. 

“Seven,” Kathryn barely husked out. “Let’s move this over there.” She had her head tossed back as Seven rained kisses on her neck, and she finally brought it back up and looked at the blonde. The fire she saw in those eyes almost made her come undone. 

“God, Seven,” she panted. 

Seven’s chest rose and fell as she nodded. “I concur. It is a much more suitable option over there.”

Kathryn let the former Borg take her hand and lead her towards the shore, but just before they stepped foot on dry land, she found herself once again hoisted up in strong arms.   
“I can walk, you know.” 

“Yes, I am aware, however, this way, you don’t have time to talk yourself out of this.”

Long fingers ran through blonde hair. “I can’t.” I really can’t. 

“Nor can I,” Seven stated matter of factly, then gently laid the older woman on the makeshift bed. She only took a second to admire this woman who lay naked before her, then lowered herself until she was completely covering the Captain, who accepted the weight and warmth of the body pressed into her own. It filled her with an ecstasy that was so completely and utterly dizzying that she felt she might pass out.

“I need you. Make love to me,” she managed.

“Yes,” Seven responded softly, and then kissed her once again, more eagerly this time devouring her mouth, taking charge of it and her body. All Kathryn Janeway could do was surrender herself to this beautiful former drone as lips, tongue, and fingers moved over her body, claiming it, branding it. She gave herself to Seven, heart, body, and soul, basking in the way her body responded to each touch. 

As the orgasm swept through her, crashing over her in waves, she felt a tinge of guilt in the back of her mind, knowing deep in her heart she should never have allowed this to happen.


	2. Part 2

**Part 2**

Kathryn felt the string of cobwebs fill her eyes as she began to emerge from the depths of sleep. She had slept hard, and as she tried to move her heavy head, she noticed how pleasant and thoroughly satisfied her entire body felt.

A smile filled her lips as she gradually became more aware of the warmth and soft weight that seemed to surround her. Then the sudden shift of smoothness and the slight edge of metal sliding into her thigh fell against her, and in that groggy moment she was not entirely sure where she was. All she knew for certain was that she had never felt more comfortable, and she was hesitant to open her eyes lest it disappear. She knew she was not alone, and she did not want to think about that right now.

“Mmmm, Kathryn.”

_That voice! Oh my god! Did I really?_ Her eyes snapped open and searched the immediate area, revealing that she and Seven were wrapped together. They were so close she could not determine where she began and the other woman ended. “No, tell me no,” she voiced dazedly yet firmly.

“Kathryn,” Seven sleepily murmured again, and the silky sound of her voice coming out of that mouth made the Captain’s heart race faster. Seven’s legs slid against Janeway’s, and it caused the smaller woman’s head to fall back against the softness of her makeshift pillow, which was Seven’s arm. “Are you okay?”

“This….” Kathryn was finding it hard to find her voice in that moment. “We….” She swallowed tightly in a very dry throat.

Seven shifted again, the movement causing even more skin against skin friction, and it took all Janeway’s strength to not let it unravel her completely.

“We?” she asked, her eyes full of concern.

“Um, let’s get dressed, shall we?”

“If that is what you desire.” Her voice sounded small and unsure, but she complied, moving away from the Captain until they were no longer touching.

Feeling the loss, Janeway immediately regretted it, yet knew it was what needed to be done. All she could do was watch as the blonde quickly put on her bio suit. She tried to move faster, but her movements were slow and heavy, and she felt as if she were not in her right mind. Finally, she managed to put her own clothes back on and blew out a long breath.

“Have I disappointed you, Kathryn?” Seven inquired, worried eyes narrowed in on the other woman.

The anxiety in the blonde’s voice nearly tore Kathryn apart. She knew this was going to be a difficult conversation and she cursed herself at getting herself into this situation. She wished…. well, she wished for a lot of things, but she knew what she had to do. “Of course not,” she blurted out, running a hand through disheveled hair. “You could never….” She trailed off, biting the inside of her lip to keep her emotions in check. “You see…. Seven…. This never should have….”

“Paris to Captain Janeway.”

Both women flinched at the staticky interruption. “Was that…?” The Captain gasped as she frantically began to look for her com badge. After locating it, she quickly answered. “Janeway here.”

“Oh tha---good---are---you…..” The distressed signal was choppy and weak.

“Lieutenant, are you there?” Janeway asked firmly.

Radio silence fell heavy between them, and they both waited until the Captain’s patience finally wore out. “Janeway to Paris, come in Paris.” They were greeted with more silence, as Seven pinned her back into a bun, looking perfect as ever as she began to clean up the area.

Awkward silence lingered between them as they waited for a response. Kathryn watched as the other woman efficiently gathered up the little belongings they had with them. She clenched her fist, and re-clenched it, as the other hovered just above the com badge. She knew she needed to talk to Seven about them…what happened between them last night. She wanted to tell this woman how that was the best night of her life, and it both saddened and sickened her what she had to do instead.

She needed to do it now and get it over with, but she was being uncharacteristicly cowardly. Captain Kathryn Janeway never backed down from anything, ever, but she was absolutely terrified her to her core. _Just tell her! _Swallowing, she exhaled a large breath. “Seven, we need to…”

“Captain Janeway, come in.” Tom’s voice broke through and she had never been so thankful at being interrupted.

“I’m here, Lieutenant.”

“Sorry, it’s this storm. I’m having a hard time zeroing in on you,” he replied. “My instrument panel is going haywire.”

“Be careful; that’s what happened to us just before our shuttle went down.”

“I’m about 17 clicks away. One second,” was all he said before the com went dead.

Seven’s eyes narrowed in on Kathryn’s for a long moment and then in the next instant they were on the Delta Flyer.

“And, I got you,” Tom cocked off with a satisfied grin. “Now, let’s get out of here.”

Seven was still holding their gear, which included the water samples she had retrieved while the Captain was asleep. However, that was the furthest thing from her mind right now. All she really wanted was answers, and judging by the way Kathryn was acting, she calculated the probability of getting them to be almost zero.

…………….

Voyager became very chaotic the moment the two women came aboard. There was a bizarre mishap with Paris on the holodeck. Then they provided much needed assistance to a planet suffering from a nuclear winter. Both prevented Seven from having a moment alone with the Captain, a moment she desperately needed.

Finally, after regeneration, she used the computer to locate the elusive Captain, who was in her ready room. Squaring her shoulders, she gathered up her Borg persistence and determination and sounded the door, somewhat surprised that it opened right away.

She could sense the older woman’s uneasiness the moment their eyes met. “Captain,” she greeted formally.

“Seven,” Kathryn acknowledged, her tone cracking slightly as she swallowed, trying desperately to keep her command mask in place.

“It is essential that we speak.”

Janeway knew she was not going to be able to keep avoiding this, no matter how hard she tried. And oh, how she had tried to put it off. She signed inwardly and tried to muster up the bravado she used to fight the Borg Queen.

“You’re right,” she conceded. Standing from the desk, she slowly climbed the stairs to the sofa.

Puzzled, Seven followed her. Stopping just a few yards away, she waited in her customary pose, arms behind her back. She stood there waiting for a command as she watched the Captain settle back against the cushions and cross her legs. Growing impatient, she decided to speak.

“Would you at least acknowledge what happened on the surface of Ealora Vars?”

“What exactly should I acknowledge, Seven?” Kathryn inwardly flinched at the harshness in her tone, but she had to do this, no matter how much it was breaking her own heart.

Seven narrowed in sharply at the other woman, aware of exactly what the Captain was doing. “You are a woman of superior intelligence, yet you would have me believe you are oblivious?” she asked incredulously. “Do you require assistance with your vocabulary? Fine, if you choose not to speak of it, then I shall assist you. You and I engaged in sexual relations. Coitus. We copulated. Perhaps you prefer the term making lo…”

Kathryn growled as she forcefully held a hand up to interrupt the former Borg. “No, don’t you dare say that,” she bit. “What happened down there was a mistake. A HUGE mistake. It never should have happened,” she huffed. “Do you understand?” Her eyes hardened as they practically dared the other woman to defy her.

Seven felt her heart twist painfully at the words coming out of the mouth she had come to know so intimately. It was just a few weeks ago that this exact same mouth smiled at her so radiantly, so tenderly…not to mention how that glorious mouth gave her such erotic pleasures, ones she never knew her body was capable of feeling.

“With all due respect, I can confirm that I understand you are being a coward, Captain.”

Kathryn was unable to reprimand the woman for talking to her in such a manner, since deep down Seven was right. “I’m going to tell you one last time. It was a mistake. It never should have happened. I should never have allowed it to happen,” she said tightly. “In fact, I would very much like you to forget it, forget everything. And we will not speak of this again.” She knew she was being cruel towards Seven, when she really had been carrying so much anger and guilt towards herself for acting against the core principles she had based her entire career on.

“Is that a command, or a threat, Captain?” The blonde asked defiantly, her eyes like lasers as she gazed at Janeway with a look that reminded her of the Borg Queen herself.

Janeway hated this, absolutely loathed how this was playing out, but maybe if Seven hated her just a little, then this whole thing could blow over and become a non-issue. Who knows, maybe in time they could even be friends again. _Friends? Who are you kidding, you have been distancing yourself from her long before you were stranded. _“Take it as you will, but this conversation is over. We will not speak of this again. Understood?”

Seven stood tall, masking how her heart was shattering into a million tiny particles of matter. She inhaled deeply to keep her anxiety at bay, then nodded. “Understood,” she responded, her voice neutral. Pivoting to leave, she hesitated. “You can reframe it however suits you, Captain, but I have an eidetic memory. I cannot and I will not ever forget what happened between us.”

Janeway flinched at hearing that, and it took all her willpower not to throw herself at Seven’s feet and beg for forgiveness. Instead, she shifted her gaze out the viewport.

“You’re dismissed,” she finally said, her tone cold and calculated. Her eyes remained hard until she heard the door hiss, and then her head fell into her hands. She gathered breath after breath until her chest burned less and less, and the sting of her tears eventually dissipated.

………….

Days had passed, and Seven sat alone at her work station, contemplating everything that had happened. She regretted removing the fail-safe device. If she hadn’t, then she wouldn’t have a broken heart. The pain in her heart was excruciatingly painful, and she absolutely hated this human emotion, so much so that she could better comprehend why the Borg deemed humans to be an inferior species. Oh, how she longed for the time she found human emotions irrelevant.

Seven found herself stranded on another planet, this time with Chakotay, and after they were rescued and returned to the ship, she couldn’t help notice the haunted look in the Captain’s eyes. It stirred up a mixture of emotions in the former Borg, and she was at a loss in how to label them, much less cope with them.

The hissing of the doors snapped her back to reality, and she uncharacteristically smiled as she greeted her guest. Surprised, she flinched. Smiling was not something she did. _Perhaps my damaged myocardium has caused me to malfunction_

“Commander, state your purpose.” They had been spending more time together as a result of getting to know one another better while stranded. What was it with her getting stuck on planets with superior officers? Of course, Chakotay was not Kathryn, but she had to admit that he was a nice distraction from her emotional pain, and the time they spent having dinner or engaging in something called “small talk” gave her a respite from ruminating on her Captain. Chakotay was polite and kind, and all of a sudden seemed to forget that he ever protested Seven of Nine being allowed to stay aboard Voyager.

“Welllllll,” he drawled. “I have something planned, and I was wondering if you would care to join me?” 

Seven raised a curious brow. “Oh?” she toyed with him. Her social skills were improving dramatically, despite the methods the doctor used to educate her.

“Is there a relay that requires realigning?” she said with a straight face. “Or does the warp core need recalibrated? If so, I believe that would be the responsibility of Lieutenant Torres.” 

Chakotay grinned. “, it’s neither, so how about you meet me in Cargo Bay 2 after your shift? About 30 minutes?”

Seven couldn’t help but smirk, knowing that Chakotay was the one who scheduled the shift rotations. “Fine, I will oblige you, but only because that is where I regenerate,” she played.

“See you then,” Chakotay beamed.

……….

Kathryn had been a mess for the few days Seven was lost to her on that planet with the commander. She had been petrified and irritable, snapping at her crew, demanding they work around the clock to rescue her…. or rather them. She didn’t sleep, which only lowered her tolerance for frustration. She had no idea how her mood was affecting others until little Naomi Wildman sought her out to reassure her. “Seven will be back, I just know it. You will rescue her just like you did with the Borg.”

_Am I that transparent?_ she thought, as she ran a hand over her face. She was on the verge of tears as her head fell at her desk. “Captain,” Tuvok’s voice broke out over the con.

Composing herself, she replied quickly. “We have something, report to the bridge.”

“On my way.”

Time almost stopped for Captain Janeway when she heard that Seven had been beamed back aboard Voyager, safe and sound. She literally ran to the medical bay without even bothering to excuse herself from the bridge. Only to find she couldn’t go all the way inside. As soon she heard Seven’s voice, she froze just inside the doors. All she could do was stand there and stare at the woman she loved with all her heart. Gathering in a deep breath, her eyes took her all in. The way her hair fell loosely down around her shoulders. The tiredness in her blue eyes. Bio suit dirty. Despite all that, she still took Kathryn’s breath away. Like a magnet those same tired eyes sought her out, and Kathryn knew without a doubt she hadn’t muttered one word, not moved an inch to indicate she was there. 

They locked eyes and Kathryn felt her heart drop into her feet, and she was speechless once more. Just like on that planet. She felt weak and the room grew quiet as more of her crew became aware that she was in the room.

She finally got it together enough to step more into the room. Kathryn quickly averted her gaze to her commander. “Chakotay, glad to see you are still in one piece. I expect you to return to your duty as soon as possible.” She told him. She did not speak to the former Borg and kept her gaze off her as well.

“Aye Captain.” The Commander said, knowing that Janeway knew he would be back on his feet soon. He knew that she had to worried about them, he could see it in the worried lines that fell around her eyes.

She inhaled and nodded. “I’ll be on the bridge.” She turned and walked away leaving a perplexed expression on the rest of her crew. They shrugged it off, not noticing the pained expression on Seven’s face, since it was masked behind that cold, steel Borg exterior.

……………….

The tension between her and Seven was killing Kathryn, and she knew she had to repair the hurt she had caused. Finally gathering the courage to face it, she pulled down on her tunic before entering Cargo Bay 2, stopping dead in her tracks at what she saw. Blindsided, it hit her harder than a gale force wind or a torpedo that could blow Voyageur into smithereens. She was overwhelmed with the unexpected sound of Seven’s beautiful laugh, it was a laugh that could set her heart and soul on fire. It was a laugh that she had only had the pleasure of hearing it one other time, that magical night on the surface of Ealora Vars.

Her hand went immediately to her heart and she wobbled backwards as quietly as she could, inching to the side just enough to catch a glimpse. She blinked, shocked at what she was witnessing, and it just about brought her to her knees, and not in a good way. Right there, just a few feet away, Seven was sitting on the floor with Chakotay, having what appeared to be a friendly picnic.

_Oh, who are you kidding, it’s not just a picnic but a date. It’s only obvious, look how he is looking at her. I should go over there and…._

_Nothing, I will do nothing. I have no right…what I did to her was unthinkable and so awful. Besides, look at her. She looks so happy. He makes her laugh. _

Ignoring the tears that had sprung up in her eyes, she quietly left, going straight to her quarters to replicate a whiskey. She slammed it back, then replicated two more. Seven had moved on, and this was all her fault. Intrusive, unwanted thoughts looped in her head, and she was going to need more than three drinks to make them disappear, but in spite of her best efforts, torturous images flashed before her eyes, Chakotay kissing Seven, his rough hands sliding down a naked, silky back, his….his……Unable to finish the thought, Janeway felt a wave of nausea consume her and spent the next couple of hours replicating drink after drink until the images disappeared when she finally passed out.

………………………..

The next few days turned into weeks, and Seven was grateful to stay busy with her duties, as well as helping the doctor and spending more time with Chakotay. It kept her mind off thinking about the Captain. She had managed to avoid the woman who had shattered her heart, addressing her only as her duties required.

Seven found herself headed to the medical bay to face Janeway. She was going to have to face two Janeways, since Kathryn from the future had recently made an appearance. The older Janeway’s appearance had set the crew abuzz, and all Seven knew was that she had come aboard with a mission and promise to bring them all home. Home…it was an unfamiliar concept to Seven, as Voyager had been the only home she had ever known. Her hard Borg exterior effectively masked the unease she felt inside, wondering what a future on Earth would look like for her.

Since leaving the Captain’s ready room that day, Seven had done such a masterful job of distracting herself and avoiding thinking about what had happened on that planet. However, as soon as she laid eyes on the older version of the woman she loved, it all came washing over her again, like it had just happened. Her eyes met the older Kathryn’s, and she felt a shiver up her spine as she tried to discern what she saw in the Admiral’s eyes. It was difficult to ascertain if she hated her or wanted to devour her, but it almost looked like the older Janeway had just seen a ghost.

Swallowing the lump that had crept into her throat, she once again longed to be a drone so she didn’t have to experience these human emotions. Hesitating briefly, she willed herself to maintain a professional demeanor in spite of how unnerving and heartbreaking this whole thing was. _I am Borg, _she told herself, then squared her shoulders as she tried to walk by the Admiral.

“Hello, Seven,” the older woman greeted, and Seven could not help but look at her…. really look at her. This Janeway was indeed older, but she was just as beautiful as Seven’s Janeway…._ Captain Janeway! _ There was something distinctly different about this woman, something in her eyes, and she had no frame of reference to identify exactly what that was.

She managed a polite nod towards the older Janeway as she handed her PADD to the Captain. “The technology on the Admiral’s ship is impressive. Much of it appears to have been designed to defend against the Borg,” she informed.

Captain Janeway had not interacted much with Seven lately and being this close to her right now was tearing her up inside. It took every ounce of willpower to maintain her professionalism. “Could we install these systems on Voyager?” she asked, her voice strained.

“The stealth technology is incompatible, but I believe we can adapt the armor and weapons.”

Their breaths mingled, as did their gazes. This was the closest they had been physically since the planet, and the energy between them was palpable.

“Well, Captain?” the Admiral interrupted the quietness between them, causing both women to immediately take a step back.

Breaking out of her resolve the Captain handed the PADD carefully back to Seven, making sure she didn’t touch her. “Do it”

…………………

Once again, the Borg Queen attempted to interfere with Seven during her regeneration cycle. As much as she didn’t want Kathryn to know, it was necessary for the doctor to relay this critical information to the Captain. Now she was in sickbay, surrounded by both Janeways. It was making her head hurt, which was unusual given her new cortical node.

Later, back in the comfort of her work station, she glanced up at the Commander as he approached her, a concerned look on his face.  


“I heard what happened. Are you all right?” Chakotay asked, moving as close as he could to the blonde.

“I am adequate,” she answered.

“Because if you need time to rest, I am in charge of the duty roster.”

A soft smile graced her features. He had been very kind to her since they had become close. They had kissed, and she had to admit that although it was nice, her physiological response to him was neutral, not at all comparable to what a simple touch from Kathryn would trigger in her autonomic nervous system. “It would be inappropriate to allow our personal relationship to impact your command decisions.”

The Commander playfully cleared his throat. “You're right. This is a time to keep things professional. Report.”

Seven could do professional. After all, she had plenty of practice ignoring the ache inside of her every time the Captain walked into the room. “There is no sign of Borg activity within a ten light year radius.”

“That’s good news.”

“Yes, Commander. However, it would be unwise to underestimate the Collective,” she reminded.

“The Admiral seems confident we can make it past them,” he pointed out.

“Captain,” she almost faltered just saying her name. “Janeway is more prudent to be cautious.”

Chakotay’s voice softened. “Our chances would be good with one Kathryn Janeway on the bridge, but with two, I'd bet on this ship any day. If we do make it back to Earth, what are your plans?”

She could not disagree with his assessment about Janeway, but she would not voice it. As for returning to Earth, she had no idea what she was going to do. Although she was born there, it was foreign to her. Her anxiety about returning to the Alpha Quadrant had only increased as it became more and more of a reality. She felt lost and confused, and they weren’t even there yet.

At one point she had dreamed about going home…home with Kathryn to Indiana, where she would finally get to meet Gretchen and Phoebe. That would never happen, it was no longer even an option for her. Inhaling deeply, she tried to keep the shakiness out of her voice.

“I assume Starfleet Command will want to debrief me upon our arrival,” she told him. “I suppose I will attempt to secure a useful position somewhere. How about you?”

The look in his eyes was so kind, so loving and tender, and it was one she wished she still saw when Kathryn looked at her. She had seen it before when she and Kathryn had that magical night on the planet, but since they returned, those blue grey eyes only looked at her with contempt and coldness.

“I’m not sure where I will end up,” he answered. “But wherever it is, I’m going to make sure I’m within transporter range of you,” he said with a smile.

………………………….

“Find a way to destroy that hub,” Kathryn ordered, then glared at the Admiral. “Let's take a walk,” she commanded.

Kathryn was all fired up with all the nonsense with the trans warp hub and felt like she was just going through the motions of arguing with this imposter, until she heard the words that rocked her to her very core.

“Seven of Nine is going to die.”

“What?” she managed to squeak out, her eyes stinging with unshed tears.

“Three years from now. She'll be injured on an away mission. She'll make it back to Voyager and die in the arms of her husband.”

_No no no no….tell me I heard that wrong._ “Her husband?” She felt the bile in the back of her throat just from saying those words.

“Chakotay. He'll never be the same after Seven's death, and neither will you.”

It was too much. She couldn’t deal with this, any of this. She inhaled a shaky breath, wondering if this was all just a bad dream that she could wake up from and find out none if it was real. Her stomach twisted in knots as it became more and more apparent that this was not a horrific nightmare. “If I know what is going to happen, then I can prevent it,” she said sternly.

The Admiral continued to talk, but Janeway had a hard time focusing on what she was saying. Something about Tuvok, but all she could think about was Seven dying in Chakotay’s arms.

………………………….

Admiral Janeway found her way to Cargo Bay 2. She was on a mission, but not getting anywhere. “I have known you for a long time, Seven. Longer than you've known yourself. You are thinking that collapsing the network is an opportunity to atone for atrocities you participated in while you were a drone. It's time to let go of the past and start thinking about your future.”

Seven’s brow furrowed and she turned on the older woman. She only had one thing on her mind, and it had nothing to do with them getting home. “May I ask you a question?”

“Of course, Seven, what is it?”

“Think back to when we arrived to Chillion space, the FV sector, we went by it after the Q2 came on board. Do you recall any of that?”

Her brow furrowed as if deep in thought. “That was a long time ago.”

“Not so long for me.”

That drew a smile from the Admiral. “Yes, I believe I do. What about it?”

“Really?” Seven absorbed this. “Do you recall you and I getting stranded on a planet together?”

The Admiral thought back to that point in her life once more, but eventually shook her head “No, we went around that sector of space if I recall, something about an Ion storm. Why do you ask?”

Seven contemplated that, trying to determine if she was being truthful or if she was avoiding, but the look in this woman’s eyes was not the same as the Captain’s. “Because we did not go around; we landed on the surface of that planet.”

“Okay,” the Admiral drawled. “Do you want to tell me what happened, Seven?”

Seven contemplated telling her all of it…. how she had made love to her Kathryn until the rise of the three red suns began to drift above their naked bodies. How she loved Kathryn, given herself to her, and how much it broke her to hear the other woman tell her it was a mistake. She exhaled a long breath. What would be the point? She had been ordered to never speak of it, and she would comply.

“No, it is nothing relevant to our mission. I was just curious. I should resume my work.”

The Admiral sighed, but before she left, she tried again. “You have friends, here. Voyager is your family. They love you. Imagine the impact your death would have on them,” she told her, then exited the cargo bay.

Seven watched her leave then went back to work. There was only one person that Seven cared about, and she couldn’t help but wonder if Captain Janeway would even care if she died.


	3. Part 3

**Part 3**

Feeling wistful, Seven stopped packing items in her bag and sighed, placing a hand above her heart. Inhaling, she thought that no matter how hard she tried, she could not stop the throbbing in her chest. She sadly gazed over at the dismantled regeneration unit and silently hoped that the portable one would be sufficient until she acquired a more permanent one. Of course, she still had no idea where she would put it. Swallowing hard, she resumed packing.

It was difficult to say goodbye to Voyager, the only place she had called home. She did not wish to leave, but now that they had safely docked on Earth, Starfleet was decommissioning the vessel, leaving her no choice but to move on.

Chakotay had kindly offered a place for her in Arizona with him and his family, but she would rather be among the stars, or in Indiana, but that was not to be. She gratefully accepted his offer and would do all she could to make it okay. It was certainly better than assimilating to Earth all by herself. But deep down she knew this was not at all what she wanted.

Sighing, she gazed one last time upon the green glow that used to provide her regeneration. It had provided her respite and recharge, and she could recall early on being aware of the Captain’s presence, and how it gave her a sense of comfort and security knowing that she was being watched over by her. A lonely tear escaped her eye as she turned to leave Cargo Bay 2 for the last time.

…………………

Captain Kathryn Janeway stood near the docking port. Her belongings were already packed, and she gritted her teeth quietly to mask her irritation at being unable to do it herself. She was surprised that Starfleet had sent some cadet in training to do it for her. She had warned them that she would have someone’s head if they broke or lost any of her things, but something in the way they responded made her question whether she had any authority left.

Starfleet had her in debriefing since the moment the ship docked, and this was the closest she had been to her vessel or her crew since returning home. Sadly, it was not her Voyager any longer, and her chest ached with grief at the reality of that.

She had spent all morning saying goodbyes to her crew. This wasn’t just her crew, they had become family while stranded in space. It was just as difficult as losing her ship, and she struggled with feeling sad while these men and women were ecstatic to be home and reunited with their families. She should feel just as happy, but she wasn’t. She was looking forward to seeing her mother and her sister, but she desperately wished she was taking a certain someone with her. Ever since the first time she told Seven about Indiana, she had dreamed about taking her there, and perhaps it is becoming Seven’s home as well.

She tried desperately to push thoughts of a certain former Borg from her mind and focusing on saying farewell to each of the crew as they departed. She had yet to see Seven or Chakotay, but she knew they were together. She heard someone talking to them in the distance, and even turned her head to look over at the blonde, but they were surrounded by so many people that she couldn’t get a clear look at her.

Kathryn was not prepared by how difficult it was to say goodbye to Naomi, and tears welled up in her eyes as she planted a kiss on top of the little girl’s head. She was watching her walk off towards her mother, when she heard her rank being called.

“Captain.”

Her spine snapped and she felt the chill run down it at the familiar voice. Gathering a sharp breath, she took a moment before turning around.

“Seven,” she greeted cordially. Just like it seemed to always be lately, Chakotay was right by her side. “Commander,” she nodded, with a forced smile.

“Not for much longer,” he teased.

“Oh?” She kept her eyes on him, when all she wanted to do was look at Seven and tell her she loved her, how wrong she had been, and then pull her in her arms and never let her go. She felt like she was in a haze as she blinked a few times, smiled and nodded, and focused on trying to engage in friendly small talk.

“Kathryn!” Startled by the loud familiar voice, she turned and squinted in disbelief.

“Mark?”

“I came as soon as I heard,” he happily grinned, as he practically ran towards her. As soon as he was close enough, he swept her up in his arms. “I’m so glad you are home. I’ve missed you so much!”

Confused by his eagerness and enthusiasm, Janeway quickly shrugged out of his embrace. “Okay, um,” she began dizzily. “It’s good to see you.”

“Oh my,” Mark breathed. “You look amazing! I can’t believe you are really here. I thought for sure I’d never see you again.”

Overwhelmed, Kathryn could only nod. Her head was spinning. This was too much, too fast. She thought she heard Seven’s voice break through the haze in her mind, was she saying goodbye? It was difficult to discern with the chaos of emotional reunions. Mark was rambling on and on about how excited he was to see her. She finally had no choice but to hold up a hand to stop his ranting.

“Please, slow down. I still need to say goodbye to the rest of my crew,” she told him firmly. She did not want to be rude. She once loved this man, but right now he was annoying her. So much for any lingering feelings she may have had.

He nodded and then swallowed awkwardly. “Yes, sorry, I knew that. I was just so….”

“It’s okay. Let’s try to catch up after things settle down. Right now, I just need to get through this,” she said. She turned around, in hopes that Seven might still be nearby, but the blonde was nowhere in sight.

She frantically searched the area, ignoring the confused looks on the crew who were still waiting in line to talk to her. Finally, after a couple of minutes, she located Seven, who was standing in the line waiting for a shuttle to transport her to the surface.

Janeway desperately wanted to run to her, command her to stay. Tell her she loved her and beg her for a chance to work this out. But deep down she knew that would be a mistake. That was exactly what she had told Seven. That what happened between them was a mistake and that she should forget all about it. It would appear that despite her eidetic memory, Seven had indeed forgotten about it and moved on. What did Kathryn expect her to do?

She continued to gaze at the woman she loved…the woman who would always own her heart and her soul. Ignoring the stain of tears that burned in her eyes, she watched as Chakotay rubbed a hand tenderly down her back. He looked at Seven with such care and tenderness as he leaned down and whispered something in her ear. A gaping hole tore right through her chest as she watched Seven give him a soft smile and leaned into his touch. She looked so happy, and Kathryn was determined that she would not cause her any more pain. She would step aside and let her be happy with him, even if it was killing her.

Janeway could not bring herself to look away, her eyes watching the blonde step into the shuttle. She remained frozen in place until she could no longer see the glimmer of her bio suit. Finally, she cleared her throat and blinked the moisture out of her eyes, turning back to finish saying farewell to the rest of her crew.

Seven settled aboard the crowded shuttle and gazed out the window, hoping to get one last glance at the woman she would always love. She had held out hope that perhaps they would talk, maybe clear the air, but it never happened, as it seemed everyone wanted to speak to the heroic Voyager Captain. She didn’t even get a chance to tell her goodbye, as that moment was stolen from her as well, thanks to the man who ran in to literally sweep Kathryn off her feet.

She watched Kathryn until she disappeared out of sight, then sighed softly as Chakotay settled in beside her.

“We can see Voyager again, you know. I hear they are going to make her into a museum on the grounds of Starfleet. We can also visit anyone you would like to see,” he told her. Reaching out, he gave her hand a comforting squeeze. “I promise you, I will do everything I can to make this transition easier for you.”

Seven offered him a tiny smile and nodded. “I know you will. Thank you, for everything.”

“In time you will adapt, we all will,” he breathed, holding her hand tightly in his.

……………

Rain poured down from the dark clouds over Starfleet Headquarters. It was dark and gloomy, and seemed to match Admiral Janeway’s mood perfectly. She had been promoted soon after returning to Earth, and even Kathryn was surprised at how quickly it happened. Publicly she had been lauded as a hero, but she was quite aware that Starfleet Command preferred to keep her grounded so she would not strand another starship. She was still adjusting to her new position, and although she had dreamed of being an Admiral, so far it hadn’t exactly felt as good as she thought it would.

She wasn’t just adjusting to her new duties, she was also mourning. She was grieving the loss of her crew and Voyager. Oh, how she missed her crew. She tried to convince herself that she missed each and every one of them, but deep down inside it wasn’t Neelix or Harry that she longed for.

“Seven,” she whispered, as she gazed out the window, watching the rain hit the ground. Her heart was heavy, and her chest hurt. She was trying to do what she had commanded Seven to do and forget about it, but she found that easier said than done.

She heard the knock on the door and a familiar voice call out to her.

“Captain.”

Blinking rapidly, she quickly composed herself before turning around to greet her visitor.

“Lieutenant Paris,” she smiled fondly.

“I apologize for stopping by unannounced, but I wanted to see you before I deploy,” he told her, then his eyes widened as he noticed the new insignia indicating a new rank on her collar. “Oh, my apologies, Cap…. I mean, Admiral,” he stammered, clearly embarrassed.

Janeway waved him off as she lifted her mug to her lips to take a sip. “When are you leaving?”

“In just a few hours, Ma’am,” he paused, then lowered his voice. “I just wanted to let you know, and maybe ask if you wouldn’t mind looking out for B’Elanna and Miral while I’m gone?”

“Of course, I don’t mind. I would be happy to.” She pointed toward the chair and he sat down immediately.

“You’ve come a long way, Lieutenant. I’m very proud of you,” she told him honestly.

“Thank you, Admiral,” he beamed. “That means a lot coming from you.”

They engaged in small talk, and he told her about he and B’Elanna were adjusting. He also filled her in on how his family was doing, as well as what the rest of the crew had been up to since arriving home. She tried not to wince when he mentioned Seven.

“Oh?” she managed a bit breathlessly.

“I heard from Chakotay that they are living and loving it in Arizona. He also said she is adjusting really well.”

Janeway was happy to hear she was doing okay, although if she were honest, a part of her was jealous and wishing Seven needed her. She quickly changed the subject. “Did you hear about Harry?”

“Yes, and I’m excited for him.”

…………………

The desert sun was hot, and it reminded Seven of the heat of the planet she was once marooned on. She was wearing a new outfit that was actually not much an outfit at all, and although it cooler than her bio suit had been, she was still sweltering.

She was grateful for her nanoprobes, but lately they seemed to be malfunctioning as she did not have her customary energy or laser focus. In addition, every time she consumed nutritional matter, it just made her ill. She had deduced that the combination of the overbearing heat and the gravity of Earth were the cause of her deficiency. Earth. What a stupid planet. She was born here, but since Voyager returned, she felt more like an alien. Perhaps that was why she was behaving so uncharacteristically; she was living on an alien planet. She was finding it more and more difficult to be her normal productive and efficient self, when all she really wanted to do was lie around in the air conditioning.

As soon as they had arrived, she had been debriefed many times, by just about everyone in Starfleet Command. Although a few of them were initially wary of her connection to the Borg Collective, it didn’t take long for her to win them over. The offers began to come in from all over, but Starfleet was the only one that appealed to her. She had yet to formally accept it, due to her lack of energy lately. It had nothing to do with fear of running into her former Captain.

Right now, she was stretched out on the comfortable sofa, dozing off in the comfort of the cold air coming out of the vents. She was in a light sleep when her acute hearing alerted her to her boyfriend’s rumblings as he came through the door.

“Seven,” Chakotay greeted happily as he entered his apartment.

“Hello,” she returned, but didn’t attempt to move from her position.

He entered the room, still smiling as he came closer to the woman, he had been sharing his home with for the last eight days. They had become closer but had not yet been intimate. He was a gentleman and would never push her. He was loving being back home and getting back into his old life, the life he had before he ever decided to join the Maquis.

He couldn’t help but worry about Seven. He had assumed she would want to jump right into work, but she was not acting like herself. He had introduced Seven to most of his family, and they had been quick to embrace her as one of their own, even though they had not discussed marriage. She had spent a lot of time with his relatives and seemed to enjoy them as much as they loved her. He had hoped it would help her adapt to her new life, and it worried him that she was so tired and sick all the time. He would just keep giving her as much time as she needed.

“Guess what?” he asked, coming closer and taking a spot beside her.

“Let me guess, you want me to get dressed because we are going out again,” she replied, with very little enthusiasm.

“Actually, we are staying in,” he grinned.

Narrowing in on him, she lifted an eyebrow. “I am familiar with that look. You are up to something. Explain yourself.”

He laughed. “You know me too well. My aunt is finally coming over tonight to meet you,” he said, then his brow dropped as he gazed at the side table. He then snickered and picked up the empty package of frozen dessert. “How many have you had?”

“I have consumed two,” she lied, then groaned. “Okay, I had five, but they are extremely pleasing to my palate. I could not refrain from indulging myself.”

Chakotay barked with laughter. “I never thought I’d see the day when Seven of Nine would eat five containers of Coolato dream pops,” he teased.

“They are my weakness, like some Borg kryptonite. Resistance was futile.”

That made Chakotay laugh even more. “This new humor you have developed recently is great, I love it.”

“I understand the concept of humor. It may not be apparent, but I have often found myself amused by human behavior,” Seven told him. Offering a gentle smile, she blew out a tired breath before finally standing up. “I take it you would like me to assimilate some nutritional matter for us?”

Chakotay laughed once more. “You are funny, Seven,” he acknowledged, and then shrugged. “If you would like to prepare dinner, go ahead. Or if you would rather, we could replicate something or just get take out. She told me she would arrive around six.”

Seven gave him a hard, disapproving glare. “Replicate? Seriously?”

“Yeah, okay,” he chuckled, holding his hands up as if surrendering. “You really do know my family, Seven.” He now lightly smiled, before sneaking in for a quick kiss to her lips. “I would love it if you would cook. In fact, I will help. Just point me in the right direction.”

Now Seven softly laughed. “Now you’re the funny one. As I recall, the last time you tried to assist me you damaged the meat,” she reminded, feeling a little nauseous at the thought of that burnt smell.

Right away he noticed how green she looked. “Hey, are you okay?”

“Yes, I am adequate.” She swallowed the bile that seemed to protrude up her throat but was unable to contain it. She held up a single finger. “Oh no,” she barely got out before running toward the lavatory.

Worried lines creased Chakotay’s brow as he followed her, and softly knocked on the door. “Honey, are you….” He heard her violently throwing up into the toilet and cringed. “Do you need anything?”

“No,” he vaguely heard, then the chime rang, indicating that someone was at the door.

“Hey someone is here, I’ll be right back,” he hollered through the closed door, then made his way to the front entrance. As soon as he opened the door, Aunt Violet crashed her arms around him.

“Ah my wayward nephew, so glad you are home.” She drew back and patted him on the cheek. “You look great.”

“You are early,” he voiced, then swallowed with a grimace. “You look great too.”

“Yeah my ride was early all the way around.” She waved a hand in the air. “So lucky me, more time with you,” she relayed, as she strolled by him into the room. “So where is this beauty I’ve heard so much about?”

“Um, Seven, yes, uh she is in the restroom, she’ll be out in a minute. Would you like a drink?”

“Oh yes,” she rasped. “Make it strong, and a double,” she heaved.

They had just sat down with their drinks when Seven finally strolled out of the bathroom. She still looked peaked as she reached out a hand to greet their guest. “Hello, it is nice to meet you. I am…”

Violet got to her feet and shook her hand. “I know who you are young lady, and in this family we hug.” She gathered Seven into her arms and held her tightly as Seven gave Chakotay an odd look over her shoulder, which only made him quietly laugh.

Violet drew back and gazed up at her, smiling as her hands still held the blonde’s biceps. “You are a looker,” she husked, then winked at Chakotay. She was being playful and when she turned back, she was going to voice it, but then her face went serious and her eyes widened.

“Chakotay,” she snapped. “We need to talk, now.”

Alarmed, Chakotay blinked. “What?”

“Alone,” she swallowed, and then gave a smile to Seven. “It’s okay, Dear. In fact, you should sit down. Put your feet up.” She patted Seven’s hand gently, then yanked her nephew’s and brought him to his feet, pulling him into what she assumed was the bedroom.

“Okay,” Chakotay griped as she shut the door. “What is going on?”

She poked him in the chest. “You need to make an honest woman out of that girl in there, and you need to do it now.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Marry her now, put a ring on her finger, before she shows.”

“Shows?” He blinked. “I think that spiritual retreat has went to your head,” he breathed, and opened the door. “Besides, Seven and I are taking things slow. She is still trying to adjust to Earth, and it is way too soon to talk marriage.”

Seven was already making her way down the hall, and her acute hearing had alerted her to what was being said. “What….” She barely voiced, before falling weak and leaning on the wall for support.

Chakotay immediately saw it and went to her quickly, just in time for her to collapse into his arms. “Seven,” he gasped with worry as he held her limp body.

Violet rushed to his side as she put a hand on Seven’s forehead. “You need to get her medical help.”

“What’s wrong with her?”

Violet shook her head, blowing out a breath. “I should let her tell you.”

………….

Seven blinked foggily as she narrowed in on a familiar face. “Doctor?” she rasped.

“Hello, Seven,” the Doctor greeted.

She tried to sit up more, and that’s when she realized she was in her bed at Chakotay’s place. “What are you doing here?”

“Apparently you passed out, so in a panic Chakotay called me and told me I had to hurry and get here.”

“How long was I out?”

“A few hours.”

“Oh,” Seven rubbed at her head. “So, why am I malfunctioning?”

“Well actually,” he began then hesitated, sighing as he looked at his instrument. “I’m not sure how to say this.”

Seven couldn’t help but feel alarmed, especially with him not being very forthcoming. “Am I dying?” she blurted.

Stunned the doctor quickly rectified that. “No, Seven. Of course not, but honestly, I never thought this was scientifically possible. I mean, with you being Borg…. But as I examined you, there are parts of your body that have miraculously healed. It’s remarkable.”

“If I have healed, then why am I damaged?”

“Oh, stop it, you are not damaged. As I was saying,” he continued, “it appears that your reproductive organs have inexplicably repaired themselves.”

Seven gave him a bemused, yet perplexed expression, one in which the Doctor was sure he had seen before. “Excuse me, did you just say….”

“Yes, I did,” he confirmed. “I’m at a loss as to how, in fact, I can hardly believe this myself. I even ran the test six times to make sure…” He hesitated again, which was starting to really annoy his patient.

“Explain, Doctor,” she commanded.

“Seven, you are pregnant,” he told her with a smile. “Congratulations, you are going to be a mother,” he proclaimed, clapping his hands together. “I am so happy for you. You are going to be an excellent mother!”

“Wha…. what?” Seven yelped, as her face drained of any color. “I must be malfunctioning. My hearing is impaired. Perhaps I am hallucinating. Or maybe this is just a dream, a crazy dream,” she vaguely whispered. Shell shocked, she turned over on the bed, completely ignoring the Doctor’s ramblings.


	4. Part 4

**Part 4**

“Seven, you are pregnant,” he told her with a smile. “Congratulations, you are going to be a mother,” he proclaimed, clapping his hands together. “I am so happy for you. You are going to be an excellent mother!”

“Wha…. what?” Seven yelped, as her face drained of any color. “I must be malfunctioning. My hearing is impaired. Perhaps I am hallucinating. Or maybe this is just a dream,” she vaguely whispered. Shell shocked, she turned over on the bed, completely ignoring the Doctor’s ramblings.

“Seven, I assure you, you are not malfunctioning, you are not hallucinating, and you are most definitely not dreaming,” he told her. “Would you like to have Chakotay come so we can tell him he’s going to be a father?”

Irritated, Seven jolted up off the bed and yanked the PADD out of the Doctor’s hand. “Give me that,” she demanded, and began to examine the test results. She shook her head. “Your data is inaccurate. This is not possible,” she fired. She did a self-examination, which confirmed the Doctor’s diagnosis.

“How can this be? How did this happen?” she snapped.

The Doctor put a gentle hand to her back. “You do recall our lesson on the birds and the bees, right?” he asked with a curious brow.

Anger filled Seven’s veins at his tone. She had never felt this aggravated before, and all she wanted to do was tear off someone’s cranium. “Being on Earth has rendered everyone morons,” she spewed. “I am not pregnant. Your instruments are defective,” she insisted.

The Doctor softened his voice. “Seven, they are not defective. You are pregnant. You need to accept this so we can get you on a prenatal treatment plan. Now, given the unique circumstances, I will want to monitor you and the baby throughout the remainder of your gestation,” he told her gently, yet firmly.

Seven closed her eyes and gathered a deep breath. She would figure this out and get through this. She was Borg!

“So, shall I bring in Chakotay so we can tell him the good news?”

Doctor, I may have an embryo developing in a uterus that spontaneously repaired itself, but Chakotay is not the paternal unit. It is not possible. I have not been with him in that way.”

“That way?”

Annoyed, Seven groaned. “We have not copulated, or to use your childish term, combined the birds and the bees,” she mocked. “

Shocked, the Doctor’s eyes widened. “But…but…but….you’re….”

“Yes, apparently I am with child,” she scoffed, as she examined the readings again. “According to the data, the embryo was conceived eleven weeks and four days ago.” She frowned as she internally calculated the math. It did not compute. She had only had one sexual partner, and that was Kathryn. There was no scientific explanation for how two females could combine genetic material and conceive a fetus without some sort of medical intervention.

“I apologize for jumping to conclusions,” he voiced sincerely. “So, by your calculations, the father is someone on Voyager, but not Chakotay.”

Tears filled Seven’s eyes as an alarming thought came to her. She was pregnant, and she had no idea who the father was. She searched every data base in her eidetic memory, although she was certain she would remember engaging in sexual intercourse with someone else. It was not possible. She had only had intimate relations with Kathryn, and that was precisely eleven weeks, four days, seven hours, ten minutes, and nine seconds ago. With a sharp growl, she forced the PADD back into the Doctor’s hands.

“Doctor, I would like you to examine a sample of the fetus’ genetic code,” she demanded.

Blinking, he hesitated only a moment before catching on, and immediately retrieved the sample.

“It will take the computer a couple of minutes to match the DNA. If the father is or ever has been in Starfleet, he will be in the database.”

The computer sounded, indicating a match. Seven exhaled a breath, relieved she would know for certain the identity of the other parent. Two pairs of eyes gravitated to the screen, the Doctor eager and Seven anxious with anticipation. She silently told herself that regardless of the results, she would adapt. _I am Borg,_ she reminded herself.

A photo emerged on the screen, causing the Doctor to shoot his patient a confused look. Seven’s face was white, and she looked as if she might pass out.

“How can this be?” he inquired.

Tears gathered in Seven’s eyes as a hand gently slipped over her stomach.

“This doesn’t make any sense. I mean, Admiral Edward Janeway has been dead….” He trailed off, then blinked, and read the output once more, as it finally hit him. If Admiral Edward Janeway was the closest male DNA match, and he was, and if he was dead, which he most certainly was, then that meant that the baby’s father had to be….

None of the Doctor’s medical education, none of the diseases and conditions he had treated in hundreds of species in all the galaxies prepared him for what science had just confirmed. He glanced at his patient, and her tearful face would have broken his heart…. if he had one.

“You need to tell her, Seven,” he told her firmly. “She would want to know. She deserves to know.”

Seven squared her shoulders and firmed her jaw. “This is my child, and mine alone. I do not require her assistance with parental duties.”

The Doctor raised his head and met her fiery gaze. “She has the right to know. This is her child, too.”

Seven frantically shook her head. “Why? So she can tell me that this child is a mistake and force me to terminate it? NO!” she adamantly voiced.

“I do not believe she would do that,” he tried.

“You don’t know that,” she countered, bitterness in her voice.

“I do not know what happened between the two of you, but I do know that Kathryn Janeway would want to know her child. She would want to help care for him or her.”

“I am this child’s mother, and I will provide all the nurturance and developmental necessities he or she requires,” she voiced. Crossing her arms, she leveled him a hard glare. “Need I remind you of your oath pertaining to doctor patient confidentiality?” she challenged.

The Doctor clenched his jaw. She was right, but he did not want to admit it. Finally, he sighed in resignation. “My lips are sealed,” he finally conceded.

Seven swiped at her cheeks, then cleared her throat. “I no longer require your assistance. You may exit.”

“We need to set up your prenatal plan,” he gently reminded.

“I will contact you,” she said coldly. “I just….” she faded off and swallowed. “I need….” she tried again.”

“You take all the time you need,” he told her. He wanted to say more, but instead he gave her a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder and walked out the door.

A few minutes later, Chakotay appeared. “Seven,” he greeted in a low, worried tone. “What is it? What did the Doctor say?”

She gathered a deep breath and narrowed in on the man who had done nothing but care for her since they arrived here. “You may want to sit down for this.”

……

All in all, she thought he took the news better than she thought he would. She was surprised at how supportive he was, even more so when he knelt down and took her hand.

“Marry me,” he husked, his brown eyes shimmering with affection.

Blinking, Seven regarded him with intrigue. “You want to marry me? After what I have just shared with you?” she asked in disbelief.

“I don’t care who the father is, I can be this baby’s father,” he said, then his brow furrowed. He paused for a moment, seeing how her eyes looked down at him. “Unless you want to be with the father.” He hadn’t thought of that; he just knew he didn’t want to lose her. He loved her, and he would love her child as if it were his own.

“No, I don’t,” she told him, even though she knew in her heart she did, and always would. It was Kathryn who didn’t want to be with her.

“So,” he swallowed, and Seven could sense the worry in his tone. “You know I love you, right?”

“I do,” she sighed sadly. “I’m sorry, but I cannot allow you to do this.”

Chakotay now got to his feet and gazed at Seven. He could see how distraught she looked, and he felt his heart ache. “You don’t love me, do you?”

“I do love you, but not in the way you deserve to be loved.”

He frowned, then slowly nodded. “You do know who the father is, don’t you?”

Seven let her breath out slowly as she nodded. “Yes.”

“I see. Are you in love with him?”

Once again, Seven nodded. “Yes. I do. I’ve always loved her,” she confessed.

Chakotay’s eyes widened. He immediately knew who she was talking about without having to be told. He was in shock at the admission, and he certainly could not begin to understand how this could be, but in his heart, he knew.

“You need to tell her.”

“I will never. You shall never speak of this to anyone, especially to her,” she voiced, her face hardening.

Chakotay sighed, and then hesitated as he blew out a harsh breath. “It is not my place. Your secret is safe with me,” he told her sincerely, then pulled her into his arms and held her. “You won’t have to do this alone, Seven. You will always have me, even if it’s just as your friend,” he promised.

Seven closed her eyes and melted into his embrace. “Thank you,” she said, then began to cry, because apparently pregnancy hormones caused humans to be excessively weepy.

………….

The reddish city skyline stretched out across Seven’s sight as she stood out on her balcony, letting the thinner air float around her. She could hardly believe she was here. She had found the Earth’s gravity to be heavy, but Vulcan gravity was weighing her down even more. She was nearing the end of her pregnancy, and although she had been told repeatedly that she was absolutely glowing, she did not discern anything shimmering about her. She could no longer wear any of her bio suits, or any of the clothes Chakotay had gifted her. Her wardrobe now consisted of either Starfleet uniforms of Vulcan garments she had acquired.

Once she accepted that she was indeed going to have a baby, she readily accepted Starfleet’s job offer, on the condition she completed her training in Vulcan, which they happily agreed to. The local Vulcan community had welcomed her with open arms, proud to have a bona fide Starfleet hero among them, even if she was part Borg.

It did not take her long to assimilate, and she flourished there. She completed her training faster than any of the other cadets, which did not surprise her at all. After all, she was Borg.

Between adapting to her new environment and completing her training, she managed to refrain from thinking about her baby’s other mother. However, at night, when she was alone, she would long for Kathryn as she quietly cried as she softly sang to their baby.

………….

Kathryn exhaled softly and closed her eyes as she tilted her head back in her office chair, recalling the conversation she had with B’Elanna yesterday.

She could scarcely believe it had been over five months since she had promised Tom she would look in on his wife and child. They both were doing great, except for the Klingon missing Janeway’s former helmsman.

They had not talked much about the rest of the crew of Voyager, usually focusing on catching up with each other, and of course, how Miral was growing and learning. However, this time B’Elanna casually mentioned that Tom ran into Tuvok, who told him that he ran into Seven on Vulcan.

Kathryn was shocked and wanted to know why Seven was there. All B’Elanna knew was that she and Chakotay were no longer together, and that Seven was quickly moving up the ranks at Starfleet.

The Admiral sat there and contemplated why Seven would leave Earth right after she had gotten there, but deep down she knew it was all because of her and what she had done to the poor girl.

“You offered her your help, then pulled the rug right out from under her,” she grimaced and then let her gaze linger on the open screen in front of her, which held Seven’s personnel file in Starfleet. Well, as much of it she had access to, anyway. She wondered if she could just show up on Vulcan as a guest speaker, and just happened to run into Seven. Perhaps they could finally talk and clear the air. There was so much she wanted to say…. needed to say to her.

A slow smile split her lips for the first time since she exited that worm hole. She reached for the com. “Yes Admiral,” she heard her receptionist right away.

“I need you to set up a meeting with Admiral Shanthi.”

“Right away Admiral.”

Janeway stretched back in her chair, the smile still on her face.

………………..

Seven stared at the two pips that stood out on her collar. She couldn’t believe she was a Lieutenant already. She sighed as her gaze moved from her collar to her midriff. Any day now, she would be having a baby. She rubbed slow circles over her sizable bump and smiled.

“I can’t wait to meet you,” Seven husked, and deep down she really was. Whenever anyone asked her if she was excited about the baby, she told them that emotions were irrelevant, but in her heart she felt overwhelmed with the anticipation of meeting this baby. Her baby. THEIR baby. It baffled her how much she could love someone she had never even met.

She had run into Tuvok about a month ago, and she took notice of the befuddled expression on his face at seeing the evidence of her condition. She was getting ready to meet him for a quiet dinner at one of the best restaurants on Vulcan. She gave herself one last look in the mirror, fixing her hair to let long curls fall around her shoulders. She was amazed at how fast it seemed to grow.

Seven had received a lot of compliments lately when she wore her hair down, so she decided to keep it this way.

The door chimed, and her internal clock indicated that he was right on time.

“Tuvok,” she greeted. “I am prepared to accompany you to dinner.”

He nodded and held out an arm for her to take.

Puzzled, she gave him questioning look. “Explain,” she voiced.

“I am going to escort you.” His brow lifted somewhat, then he glanced at her protruding stomach.

“I am adequate. I am pregnant, I am not damaged,” she huffed.

He gathered a breath. “Yes, but I was told to be extra careful tonight. You are due any day now,” he told her.

“I am aware of my due date,” she snapped. “I am reminded that I am close to my neonate being extracted every time I bend over to get something, not to mention the constant ache in my back and in my feet,” she grumbled.

Tuvok smiled; he had some experience dealing with moody, pregnant women. “As I recall, T’Pel said the exact same thing, which is why she instructed me to watch out for you this evening.”

Seven had met his wife and had immediately liked her. She had grown quite fond of the woman, who was both wise and smart, and she was well aware of the ramifications of either her or Tuvok going against T’Pel’s orders. Sighing in resignation, she stepped toward him, took his arm, and allowed him to lead the way.

…….

Seven poked at her t’mirak rice and then made a face at it.

“Is your meal not up to standard?” Tuvok asked.

“My digestive system is not craving nutrition,” she commented weakly.

Tuvok’s brow hung heavily. “Now that is peculiar. I believe I have never seen that before. Well, not since of late anyway.”

Puzzled, Seven realized that his observation was indeed correct. “Yes, it is very peculiar,” she agreed.

Suddenly, warm hands clouded her vision, and she immediately felt alarmed, wondering who would be foolish enough to do such a thing. She was about to unhand them, and oh, how she would insure it was painful, but before she could, she breathed in a familiar scent and her heart slowed.

“Now, Lieutenant, I did warn you about this,” she voiced, but playfulness was evident in her town.

“How did you know it was me?”

Seven raised her optical implant. “Who else would dare to do that?” Her tone was light, masking the fraction of a second she had hoped it might be someone else.

“Ning,” Tuvok acknowledged. “I see congratulations are in order. You did it,” he complimented.

Ning was half Terrain and half Vulcan. “I did, thanks to Seven helping me,” she smiled, her eyes never leaving Seven’s.

“I only assisted you one time.”

Ning quickly shook her head. “Oh, please, stop being so modest Seven and just take the credit. In fact, I believe I owe you a drink.”

Seven was about to object, and Ning just giggled.

“I know, Seven. But as soon as the Doctor gives you the go ahead, I am going to buy you that drink,” she winked.

They continued to make small talk, well, actually Ning did most of the talking, going on and on about how great Seven was. Tuvok finally had heard enough. Standing up, he decided to excuse himself.

“Well, I hate to cut this short, but I really should get home.”

Seven was feeling weary, and slowly stood as well. “Yes, my energy is depleted also. I shall return home to regenerate as well.” It seemed as if these days, all she wanted to do was sleep, even after successful regeneration.

Ning looked disappointed. “Oh,” she grimaced, then realized she had interrupted their entire dinner. “I’m so sorry, I did not mean to intrude.”

“It is okay,” Seven said, offering her a tender glance. Then suddenly she felt the pain of ten photon torpedoes implode throughout her body. On instinct, she reached out for anything to hold her steady, but both Tuvok and Ning were immediately at her side and holding her upright.

“Seven!” Ning yelped.

Tuvok was already using the device the doctor had made to get a hold of him. “I am uncertain, but I believe it is time,” the Commander said as soon as he heard the Doctor’s voice.

They rushed Seven to the nearby medical lab they had agreed on and proceeded to try to get the Borg comfortable.

“I have never hurt like this!” Seven snarled through gritted teeth. “I am Borg I will adapt,” she grunted.

“It’s okay Seven, you’ll be fine. Your contractions seemed to be 5 minutes apart….and….” Ning tried to reassure her friend.

“Have you ever expelled a fetus from your body?” Seven interrupted loudly, air coming through clenched teeth.

Ning pursed her lips and shook her head. “Then do not tell me what I am experiencing, you have no concept of it.”

She tried to remember the breathing technique she had learned, but this pain was more intense than anything she had ever felt…. even with all the Borg implants she had removed.

“I….” She cried out as another round of pain flashed through her.

The nurse on duty began to get Seven in a gown, proceeded to prepare her for what was to come.

“I know what is coming,” Seven bit, as sweat gathered at her temples. “I…. I should have…. tol…” the next contraction hit, and it was so strong that she passed out.

Worried faces filled the room, and even the normally unflappable Doctor stopped the soft melody he was humming as he prepared for the delivery.

“Prep her for surgery,” he ordered, his eyes wide. “Now!”


	5. Part 5

**Part 5**

Seven woke up gasping, and quickly yanked off the oxygen mask. The room she was in was quiet, except for the sound of machines indicating her vital signs. Blinking hazily, her eyes suddenly went wide as she reached down to her abdomen, which was flat.

No protruding stomach, which meant there was no baby.

“No,” she choked. Her vitals began to increase at an alarming rate, causing the machines to become louder. Instantly, the Doctor rushed into the room.

“You need to calm down; your heart rate has really spiked,” he chastised her.

“Where is my baby?” Seven hissed groggily.

The Doctor remained nonchalant, humming as he checked her vitals. “You mean your daughter?”

Just then the door creaked open and in walked Ning and T’Pel, wheeling in a small bassinet. Tears immediately sprung to Seven’s eyes.

“Is she….” she trailed off, too choked up to speak.

“She’s perfect, Seven,” the Doctor relayed, a happy gleam in his eyes. “You, on the other hand, have been through quite an ordeal. We almost lost you,” he informed.

Seven had tuned him out as soon as she knew her baby was okay. Not just okay, but perfect. All she cared about was seeing her baby…her daughter.

“She is so beautiful,” Ning gushed, with tears in her own eyes.

T’Pel reached down and gently picked up the tiny infant, allowing Seven to finally get a look at her child. She tried to hold it together, but tears fell down her cheeks.

“Here she is,” T’Pel said softly. “She’s been patiently waiting to meet you, Mama.”

Seven cried softly as her baby was placed in her arms for the first time. She just stared in awe as the baby continued to sleep. Eventually, she reached down and lightly brushed a few fingers over downy hair.

Feeling how soft it was on her fingertips, Seven sniffled as a small smile inched its way to her lips. “Selene,” she finally whispered, and as if on cue, the baby opened her eyes and looked directly at her mother.

Seven’s breath hitched as she gazed down and looked at familiar features. It tore at her heart and brought even more tears to her own eyes. “Kathryn,” she whispered.

Puzzled, T’Pel gave her a pointed look, as did the Doctor.

“Seven?” he asked. “Do you want me to call her?”

Ignoring him, Seven inhaled and continued to gaze down at her baby.

He tried again. “I’d be happy to tell her to…”

“No, that is her name …. Selene Kathryn Hanson.”

His hopes dashed, the Doctor swallowed and nodded. As much as he wanted to let his former Captain know she was a mother, he knew he had no choice to but to honor his patient’s wishes.

“I love it,” Ning said.

“It’s perfect,” T’Pel agreed.

Seven held her baby close to her heart, determined not to let her go, not ever, and not for anything or anyone. “I love you, Selene Kathryn Hanson,” she softly whispered against the shell of the baby’s ear.

……………….

Admiral Janeway eagerly strolled into Admiral Shanthi’s office. The older Admiral glanced up with a tired expression. “So, what is the urgent matter you wish to discuss with me?”

“I heard that Starfleet Academy is in need of guest lecturers,” she explained.

He arched an incredulous eyebrow. “Let me guess, you have a sudden urge to go into academics?” he questioned.

“You know me, Sir, I’ve always loved teaching and mentoring crew,” Kathryn explained. “I think I would rather enjoy sharing my knowledge and experience in the Delta Quadrant with our young cadets,” she said smoothly.

The Admiral pursed his lips, taking a moment to contemplate her request. “I think that is a wonderful idea,” he nodded. “Touch base with Lieutenant Commander Logan. He is in charge of coordinating the visiting professors. I’m sure he will be thrilled to add you to his rotation.”

Janeway scratched the back of her neck as she slowly nodded. “I was thinking I might like to start with the cadets on Vulcan,” she offered.

The Admiral gave her a puzzled look. “Vulcan?” he repeated. “Why there?”

“Well,” Kathryn started, searching for an answer.

Sensing her uneasiness, he narrowed in on her before his eyes lit up with understanding. “Been on Earth too long, have you? Need to get up in the stars again?”

That wasn’t entirely true, but she would go with whatever necessary in order to see her former Astronomics officer. “Something like that,” she answered vaguely.

“I get it. In fact, I still get that way myself,” he grunted and pulled a few papers out of his drawer. “I suppose you better get home and pack a bag if you’re going to Vulcan. I’ll send the order to Starfleet Command.”

Relief filled Janeway’s chest, amazed at how easy that was, yet she knew that nothing about finding and talking to Seven for the first time in months would be easy. Nothing at all.

………………..

Seven and Selene were doing exceptionally well. Seven took on motherhood like she took on everything else in her life…striving for efficiency and perfection. Being a mother was all she never knew she always wanted, and she was cherishing every moment of it. She knew couldn’t continue working as much as she had been, which was pretty much around the clock, so she requested a leave of absence to adapt.

Once again, she found herself packing a bag. “Do you really have to leave?” Ning frowned.

“I have been offered a perfect opportunity. It’s a position I’m extremely qualified for, and my duties will not require me to be away from Selene all the time. I want to be her mother in every way, not one that just shows up after work for a few hours,” Seven told her.

“But….” Ning sighed sadly.

“It’s a new beginning for me.”

“But….” Ning tried again.

“And like I said it’s a great opportunity, one that I can’t afford to refuse.”

“But….”

Seven turned to the younger woman. Noticing how distraught she was, she offered a tender smile. “I did invite you to come with me.”

Ning reached out and grasped Seven’s hand in hers. They had become closer over the weeks that followed Selene’s birth. Not as close as Ning wanted, but she was content to wait, until she received the news that Seven was leaving Vulcan.

“I know, and I appreciate that, but Betazed is, well, it’s not for me.”

“Are you sure?”

Ning had contemplated going, but as much as she wanted to be with Seven, she just couldn’t leave her hometown on a whim. She needed to stay where she was. Besides, she had not been offered a position like Seven had. “I’m sorry…. I just…”

Seven’s head dipped to meet the smaller woman’s eyes, then tenderly reached down and cupped her cheek. “I know, and you do not need to explain it to me.” It was the most emotion Seven had ever displayed toward Ning. She gave an affectionate smile, then dropped her hand away and resumed packing.

Ning continued to frown as she took in the other woman. “Whoever she was…. she sure did a number on you,” she finally dared to say.

Seven slightly froze and it took her a moment to regain her composure. She walked toward the other side of the room then whipped back around on her friend. “What makes you think it was a woman?”

That brought a slow devious smile to Ning’s lips. “Vulcan intellect,” she replied snarkily. “And well now you just confirmed it.”

Seven only shook her head and gave her a playful glare.

“So, who was she?”

“Someone that I wish to not speak of.”

Ning inhaled. “And Selene…. I mean is she……”

“That’s irrelevant.”

“So it is,” she commented. She had learned to read the Borg very quickly. “Well, she was an idiot, whoever she was.”

“This an irrelevant conversation,” Seven stated firmly.

Ning reached out and took hold of Seven’s arm as she tried to walk by her, bringing her around so she could look her in the eyes. “I get that, I do. But Seven, you are way too important to just close yourself off. Don’t let this woman have this hold over you. She doesn’t deserve you,” she swallowed, her voice thick with emotion. “You deserve to be loved and cherished and valued and desired. You deserve everything you want in life. So, you need to go out there and live your life, Seven, really live it. Live everyday like it’s your last.” Then Ning reached up and cupped Seven’s cheeks in her hands, then slowly drew in and kissed her goodbye.

……………

The light dusting of rain sprinkled on Seven’s veranda as she held Selene in her arms, watching the day slowly fade away. The lights came up on the island of Jinzu. It was beautiful here, even she could not deny that. All in all, she was pleased she had picked Betazed to make a home for her little girl.

The change in scenery had done nothing to ease the loneliness and sorrow in her heart. She still missed Kathryn and was beginning to wonder if she would ever stop. It certainly did not help that every time she looked at her daughter, she could see little pieces of her other mother in her as well.

Her heart ached with love and longing for Kathryn, but she also felt pangs of guilt for not telling her about their baby girl. Even though she was loathe to admit it, a part of her knew that she deserved to know the truth. “Do you think we should return to Earth?” she asked Selene, and the little girl in her arms just gurgled and blew bubbles at her.

Seven snorted a tiny giggle at her daughter, who was looking more and more like Kathryn every day. She sighed heavily as she contemplated her next move in this new life of hers.

…………………

Janeway felt like she had just drunk five whiskey sours as she stepped off the shuttle and headed to the Vulcan campus of Starfleet Academy. She was enjoying just being out of the office, but her heart felt full. She was nervous and triumphant, much like she felt when she rescued Seven from the Borg Queen. The butterflies in her stomach increased in anticipation of talking to the cadets…. not to mention a certain former drone. 

“Admiral,” she was greeted by her old colleague and friend.

“Tuvok!” She happily gave him a tender hug, she just couldn’t help herself. “How are you?”

“I am well, Admiral,” he responded.

“That’s wonderful.”

Tuvok wondered if the real reason she was here was to see a certain someone who was no longer on the planet. “I assume you would like to get something to eat and freshen up before your lecture?”

“That would be great,” Janeway replied breathing in some Vulcan air. “So, how’s things here on Vulcan…. how is your family?”

“I didn’t realize I missed it here. Also, they all are doing well.”

Janeway had missed their candid conversations, and for that she was glad to have come all this way. She desperately wanted to inquire about Seven, but she would just wait and ask her in person when she saw her.

In no time at all she was ready to walk into the first classroom and right away she sought out the one person she desperately wanted to see. As she scanned the room, her face fell when she didn’t recognize anyone. She drifted her eyes across the room a second time and once again came up short. 

She felt her chest tighten from the pang of disappointment at not seeing her. She cleared her throat. “Is everyone here?”

One of the young cadets scanned the room. “Yes, I believe so Admiral.”

Janeway glanced down at the attendance roster that was in front of her and immediately found Seven’s name. “Where is Seven?”

Ning raised a questioning eyebrow and narrowed in on the Admiral. “Oh yeah, I forgot you were her Captain. She isn’t here,” she shrugged nonchalantly.

“And why is that?” Janeway returned, shaper than she intended.

Ning blinked. “Um…she took a leave of absence.”

That baffled the Admiral and it took her a moment to recover. “Why?” she finally breathed.

Ning was the only one who really knew about Seven and she wasn’t going to tell this woman anything, even if she was her former commanding officer. If they were close, then she would have known she wasn’t here, and why. So instead she just shrugged.

_Just great_…. Janeway thought. _I came all this way for nothing. _She sighed, then began her lecture. “So, tell me what you know about nanotechnology?”

After the class ended and the students left, Janeway rubbed at her temples. “I need coffee,” she muttered. As she was leaving, she noticed the young girl who she somehow knew more than she let on.

“Excuse me….” she trailed off, realizing that she was not dealing with a lowly cadet. “Lieutenant.”

Ning stood more at attention. “Yes Admiral.”

“At ease,” she exhaled. “May we talk candidly?”

“Sure,” Ning answered.

“You seem to know Seven…. I mean when I mentioned her…. you….” she faded off. She now wasn’t so sure how to ask this.

Ning sensed something in the Admiral and tilted her head as she tried to read her more.

“You see,” Janeway tried again. “She was a friend and I was looking forward to speaking with her.”

Ning slightly raised an eyebrow. “Friend?” Ning wasn’t stupid, and she knew exactly who this woman was and wasn’t about to say anything more.

“Yes, a friend.”

“That’s odd; she never mentioned you. In fact, I even brought you up once in conversation and she said you were irrelevant.”

Shocked Janeway blinked, “She told you that?” she blurted, knowing that would be something that Seven would say. “I mean how ….” She stopped her sentence, gathered a breath and redirected it. “Do you know where she is?”

“I do,” she said, with no inflection in her voice.

Janeway tried to keep her annoyance in check. “Would you care to share with me?” she asked, her patience growing thin.

“No, I don’t believe so,” Ning gave back. “She wanted to keep her destination private, and I shall honor her wishes. Because I am her friend.”

“What? Why?”

“I think she needed time for herself.”

“Do you know when she will be back?”

Ning made a face and shrugged. “No, but between you and me, I doubt she will be back.” She wasn’t sure about that, but she felt she needed to say it anyways. She also had a theory.

“Really? Did she tell you that?” Janeway asked.

“She told me lots of things. I was sad to see her go,” she informed the older woman. “I should have gone with her. She did ask me to,” she sighed dramatically.

Now Janeway knew something was up, she wasn’t an Admiral for nothing. “Oh, are you and Seven in a relationship or?”

“I…” Ning began. “We were, but she had things she needed to take care of, and I had to stay here.”

“I see,” the Admiral said through clenched teeth, knowing and hating the fact that Seven was with someone else. _What did you expect, that she would be living a celibate life? She’s beautiful, she would have her choice of suitors. _ “Are you sure you can’t tell me where she is?”

Ning took a breath. “She is on Denobulan.” She knew it went against everything in her to lie to anyone, let alone a Starfleet officer, but this was for Seven.

Janeway’s forehead furrowed with disbelief. “What is she doing there?”

“Had a job opportunity,” Ning glanced back at the door. “I need to run; I am going to be late for my next class.”

Janeway watched her leave and then groaned. She wasn’t stupid, she knew Ning was not being forthcoming, but the question was…. where in the hell was Seven of Nine?


	6. Part 6

**Part 6**

Janeway searched a few other planets trying to find Seven, without any luck. It was as if the former Borg had just vanished. She was shocked that even Tuvok did not appear to know where she had gone. She couldn’t help but wonder if he knew more than he let on. She couldn’t put her finger on it, but her gut told her he was holding something back.

Perhaps Seven didn’t want to be found, well, at least by her anyway. _I really messed up,_ Janeway thought, her chest tightening as she boarded the ship that would take her back home. She had spent months on the lecture circuit, well, officially anyway, and it was time to get back to actually being an Admiral. She just wished she wasn’t going home empty handed. She hated to give up her quest, but what choice did she have? If Seven didn’t want to be found, then there was nothing she could do.

Ignoring the tiny tear that slipped from her eye, Kathryn finally allowed herself to mourn the loss of her friend. It wasn’t the loss of the friendship she was grieving, but she was not about to admit that Seven was more than a friend.

……………

Seven was thriving on Betazed. Not only did she fit right in with the people there, she also enjoyed the beautiful scenery. She had adapted to her new position at the Stellar Drive Institute, where she continued to work on her slip stream. It kept her busy, and her work was challenging, yet she had plenty of time to spend with Selene.

She enjoyed everything about living on Betazed, however, she still had that constant ache in her chest. It wasn’t just about missing and longing for Kathryn, which she did. No, this was a gnawing, nagging reminder that she needed to tell Kathryn about Selene. Every day she saw more and more of Kathryn in their daughter, especially when Selene would smile that smile that was so much like her other mother’s.

Finally, her time on Betazed was coming to an end, and it was time for Seven to make a choice to either accept her next assignment as a Lieutenant or terminate her career with Starfleet for good.

She gathered Selene in her arms as she pondered her options. She glanced over the clear blue waters of Betazed, and even though she liked it there, she really missed being out among the stars in space.

“I guess it’s time,” she said out loud, as Selene tightly grasped her hair and yanked on it.

“I suppose that means you agree,” she smiled, and Selene only cooed back.

Days turned into months as Seven excelled in her position, and it wasn’t long before she was promoted. She barely noticed, nor did she really even care, her attention was focused solely on her daughter. Selene was getting bigger, and her blonde hair had grown, and more and more seemed to glitter with a hint of strawberry. Selene was quite popular with the crew, who would flock to her every time she was around. Seven was both annoyed and honored by it. Whenever someone would inquire about Selene’s father, she would just smirk and tell them she was the father, however, internally it would trigger that nagging guilt in the pit of her stomach. It would shut them up, but that didn’t stop the whispers about who she was with, and that whoever it was, gave Selene really good genes. It would make her smile, but only for a few seconds before that ugly head called guilt came rearing back.

Seven gathered Selene in her arms as she left the mess hall and headed for her quarters.

“Commander,” Aira greeted, but her eyes instantly landed on Selene. “Hey cutie,” she made a face and took hold of one of her pudgy hands. “Gosh she is so adorable. Seriously …and seriously if you ever need a babysitter, you know I am here for you…right?”

Aira was in operations and it seemed she would suck up to Seven every chance she got, which irked Seven to no end. “Yes I know, you remind me every chance you get.”

“Sorry Commander, I was just wanting to let you know.”

Seven quietly took a breath. She was feeling more and more on edge these days, and she knew she had to do something to expel her guilt or she was going to come unhinged and take it out on the crew. “I know, and I will keep you in mind.”

Once she made it to her quarters she went right for the computer and began to write Kathryn a letter, telling her that she it was imperative that they meet as soon as possible and that she would be having shore leave soon. She paused and reread what she had written and realized that it sounded so….well, it sounded so Borg. She would have to rewrite it before sending it off, but wasn’t sure how to adequately express herself. She wanted to speak from her heart, but it still felt so broken even after all these months apart. She decided to try again later, and began to sort through her junk mail when she noticed the latest edition of the Starfleet gossip rag.

Opening it, she skimmed through the bylines, and right away one caught her attention. Admiral Kathryn Janeway was photographed with one Miles Randolf….Dr. Miles Randolf III the be precise. Apparently they had been spotted out and about together, time and time again. It was the first time she had seen Kathryn since Voyager returned, and even though it was just an image, she felt the impact of seeing her looking so beautiful….and so happy. She finally managed to tear her eyes away from the picture to read the article, but abruptly stopped when she read that an engagement announcement was surely imminent. 

Slamming off the computer, Seven stood and gathered in air as fast her nanoprobes would allow. She closed her eyes as she tried to calm herself. Her anger began to quickly dissipate as she reminded herself that this was inevitable. She had no claim to Kathryn….in fact, she never really did. She very vividly recalled Kathryn telling her that what they had shared was a mistake, and when all was said at done, by the time she left Voyager they weren’t really even friends.

The door sounded, pushing away all thoughts of Kathryn…..contacting her and telling her about Selene. The photo of her and that man she was dating haunted her, and she was determined that she would never feel guilty about not telling Kathryn about their daughter.

Seven opened the door, uncharacteristically forgetting to ask who was there. She had forgotten that Special Agent Shupe was coming by so they could eat dinner together. They had started a relationship, and although Seven liked her a lot, there was just one little hitch that had held her back. Now, however, she was more determined than ever that she just needed to move on.

“Good evening, Rukiya.”

Agent Shupe greeted her with a light kiss to her lips. “Are you ready to grab something to eat?”

Seven groaned. “I’m sorry, I forgot we had plans, and I already ate in the mess hall.”

Agent Rukiya Shupe was aboard the USS Caliber as part of its security team, and Seven had gravitated toward her as soon as they met. She was a fierce, confident woman, despite the fact she only stood at 1.65 meters. Her fiery red hair and exceptional good looks made her stand out, not just with the men on board, but the entire crew. Everyone she encountered found her attractive and appealing.

Rukiya just slid in even closer, easing one hand on Seven’s hip and gently placing the other above Seven’s hand, which was resting on the small of Selene’s back. “I guess you’ll have to make it up to me later,” she winked cockily.

Seven knew what Rukiya was referring too. Living on Betazed for almost nine months had taught her a lot. “Oh?” she teased. “I suppose I could prepare you a meal if you’d like,” she replied nonchalantly.

That made Rukiya smile. “Oh, I bet you can Seven, and I want it,” she said with a humorous growl, and moved her hand around and lightly rubbed the top of Seven’s ass.

The two had done nothing more than exchange a few kisses. Seven was quite aware that Rukiya wanted more, but she just couldn’t take that next step, even though her brain told her she should.

Seven didn’t even flinch, she just held the other woman’s gaze. She was about to lean in and make the first move when Selene squealed, immediately breaking the two apart.

“Sorry,” Seven breathed. “She has been in a mood all day.”

Rukiya noticed that the little one in Seven’s arms looked flushed, and she gently placed a hand to the girl’s forehead. “She’s a little warm.”

Seven nodded. “I am aware. I believe she is teething.”

Rukiya smiled and then went to the replicator. “Ice pop, lime,” she said firmly. Once she received it, she pulled the wrapper off and offered a taste to Selene, who immediately clawed at the icy treat, causing the sticky remains to slip over Rukiya’s hand that was now covering Seven’s.

They both just watched and laughed.

“Thank you,” Seven said softly. “Even though I am opposed to her eating such sugary foods.”

“Oh, but look at her, she is already feeling better.”

Seven couldn’t deny it; she was very much enjoying herself. “I agree,” she sighed shaking her head, yet had a tinge of a smile on her lips.

“So why don’t I take her and let her finish this, and you go change into something more comfortable, and we just stay in tonight.”

After a beat, Seven nodded and let Rukiya take Selene into her arms. The young woman immediately held her, comforting her and talking to her like they were best friends. Seven watched them venture off toward the couch, her heart swelling with a contentment she hadn’t felt in a very long time. Maybe she could finally move on from Kathryn and make a life with someone else…maybe.

…………….

Admiral Janeway rolled her eyes. Not literally, but more to herself as her date rambled on and on about some inane nonsense she couldn’t care less about. She hadn’t minded dating him before. Actually it was more like she tolerated his company, but now he was starting to really annoy her. She found just about everything about him irritating, and couldn’t help but pick the poor man apart. The way he continued to lick his teeth, the obnoxious sound he made when he cleared his throat, how loud he breathed. Not to mention how he apparently very much enjoyed looking at himself in the mirror. Yep, everything about him just annoyed the hell out of her.

Kathryn had been set up with him, and as first dates went, it was fine. She’d certainly had worse. She had never once let him inside her home, they had only exchanged a few kisses on the porch. She knew she couldn’t keep putting him off and telling him she wanted to take it slow. Seriously, how much more glacial could they be? She needed to tell him that their relationship had run its course and that it was over. They were never going to be that couple that every headline in the gossip columns said they were.

The truth was, her heart belonged to someone else, and only to her. Even if she tried to forget and move on with some so called Mr. Right….there would never be anything right about it. It would only be a poor substitute for what and who she really wanted, and she knew it.

“Miles,” her voice grated. “We need to talk.”

His forehead scrunched as he gave her an odd look. “Aren’t we talking now?”

“Um…we….you are talking, and I’m…..well….honestly, I’m only half listening to you.”

Stunned, Miles flinched back as if he had been slapped. “What?” He took a moment to count to ten before clearing his facial features. “What’s going on, Katie?”

Janeway groaned and this time she really did roll her eyes. “You know I hate it when you call me that.”

“Okay. Is that what this is about?”

“No, this is about us,” she sighed.

Miles’ face went blank, then his eyes slipped shut for an instant. He gathered a breath when he reopened them. “What you really mean to say is that there is no us. Am I right?”

Kathryn’s lips thinned. “I’m sorry. I tried.”

His eyebrow slightly lifted. “Did you really? Because I honestly don’t think you did. I think there is something that’s been holding you back. I thought it might be something going on at work, or because you were away for so long. But now I’m starting to think it isn’t something, but someone.”

Janeway paused as she bit on the inside of her lip, then inhaled. “Maybe, but I need to stop pretending with you. It is not fair to you, and even more it is not fair to me.”

Miles took a moment and let it sink in, then he quietly stood up. Setting his napkin on the table, he came around and placed a soft kiss to her cheek. “I hope he is everything you need.”

Janeway didn’t even watch him leave, she just stared at her uneaten food. “She is. She has always been,” she said softly.


	7. Part 7

**Part 7**

Admiral Janeway sighed as she glanced around the tedious atmosphere she was in, and then began to daydream about being anywhere but here. Her thoughts seemed to always drift back to a specific time in her life where she was actually lost. The irony made her laugh as she tried to distract herself from thinking about that time in her life. Voyager and the Delta Quadrant were in the past, so it seemed pointless, or as Seven would say, futile.

Smiling inwardly, she sipped on her champagne, then found herself staring up at the radiant lights above. Their pinkish glow took her back to that place….that special place she would often go, regardless of what she was doing or even what time of day it was.

She shook her head and groaned as she rubbed the bridge of her nose. “God, stop it; will you?” She had been telling herself that for almost four years now, yet it would all crawl right back in, consuming her thoughts. “I need therapy,” she grumbled irritably.

Kathryn had tirelessly searched for Seven until she finally learned that her former astronomics officer was aboard the USS Caliber. They were currently assigned to the deepest region of the Gamma Quadrant, dealing with the aftermath of the Dominion War. The war had ended, but there were threats of another uprising, and the Federation was concerned enough to send their elite crews and advanced war ships to patrol the sectors.

Janeway absolutely hated the idea of Seven being deployed there, but there was nothing she could do about it. Her hands were tied. It didn’t help that most of the information on Seven and the USS Caliber had been encrypted…. available on a need to know basis. She couldn’t help but wonder if Seven was responsible for that.

Kathryn had been relieved to learn that the threat to the Gamma Quadrant was empty, and not a single shot had been fired in years. Still, she had not heard a word from Seven, and it simultaneously broke her heart and drove her crazy.

She finished her champagne and turned to leave the party, when she heard the ring a familiar voice…. the very voice that haunted her dreams night after night. Frozen, she felt the hairs on the back her neck spike and the pit of her stomach churned with panic tinged with excitement. Her heart catapulted up to her throat, and it took everything in her to keep from breaking down and sobbing or falling to her knees right there in front of everyone.

Janeway gathered a deep breath, and then another, and even another before she managed to collect the courage she needed to turn around.

There she was, just a few feet away, surrounded by a large group of people. Kathryn could only see part of her, but she recognized that stance that was so uniquely Seven’s. She was wearing a long, blue designer dress and her hair…. God, her blonde hair had grown so much, and she was mesmerized by the large curls that went more than halfway down her back. Her heart actually skipped a beat, and even stopped when she heard a slight chuckle come from that perfect mouth.

Kathryn did not recall moving, and by the time she noticed, she was now even closer, and could finally get what her soul had longed for. She could now see the blues of Seven’s eyes. They were shining with happiness, a happiness she herself had not seen in oh so long.

She swallowed as she inched even closer, and the proximity ignited a new confidence in her. She smirked as she soaked in the melody of Seven’s voice as she shared a funny story with her captivated audience.

She wasn’t planning to speak, but she heard herself say, “Seven.” Her voice was deep and husky as her eyes never left Seven’s.

Seven had heard that Kathryn might be attending the party, and she almost didn’t go just to be safe. After giving it some thought, she decided she was not going to alter her life for someone who clearly didn’t care about her, so she changed her mind and decided she didn’t care if she saw her or not.

When she heard her voice, and how sensual it sounded…. well, it was so very Captain Kathryn Janeway that it tore at Seven’s heart…. the very heart she had kept hidden. She managed to keep her emotions in check, and she turned and looked directly into the eyes she knew so well.

“Admiral,” she greeted formally. She noticed that distinctive cocky grin on Janeway’s face. It was one that the former Borg had witnessed time and time again on Voyager, yet she could not recall ever seeing it again after their night together.

“God,” Kathryn breathed. “It is so good to see you.” She reached out her hand for Seven to take. She just needed to make contact, and she didn’t care how.

Seven’s eyebrow rose as she stared at the offered hand, and she wasn’t sure if she was feeling anticipation or mistrust. She finally accepted the handshake, and right away felt that familiar warmth and softness…. the very combination that drove Seven to the brink of ecstasy, and she knew without a doubt she would never be the same from it. She gritted through it, and almost flinched at the intensity in Kathryn’s eyes as they seemed to scan her entire body.

“I see you are doing well,” Seven finally said.

Janeway inched closer. “Oh, I suppose, but I’m definitely doing better now.”

Seven eyed her with curiosity, uncertain what her former Captain was referring to. After a beat, she nodded. “Well, I assume you need to get back to your date.”

Janeway made a face and shook her head. “My date?”

Seven’s eyebrow arched again, and her eyes then turned toward something behind her. “Yes, your date.” She then motioned with the nod of her head.

Kathryn turned around and cringed when she noticed the man she had been avoiding all night…. well, not just tonight, she had been avoiding him since she had returned to Earth. “Oh, no,” she spewed, whipping back around toward Seven. “He is not my date.”

The look on Kathryn’s face made the blonde smile. “Oh?” she questioned teasingly. “Why not? He seems handsome enough.”

Janeway instantly knew Seven was messing with her. “Seven,” her voice grated. “Somehow I know better.”

Seven’s eyes grew darker as confidence radiated off her, so much so that the way she smiled made Kathryn catch her breath. It was new, and it thrilled her to no end. She could feel that old familiar spark between them, and she was falling back into it, but the spell she seemed to be under was broken when Seven spoke again.

“He seems perfect for you. He’s an older man, and not under your command.” Seven paused, her eyes serious as she glanced back at him, then back at Kathryn. “And he doesn’t appear to be a mistake…. not at all.”

Completely caught off guard, Kathryn felt her chest rise and the heat spread through her face. She was ready to strike back and tell her how wrong she was, but just as she opened her mouth, Walter interrupted.

“Kathryn, there you are.” Walter leaned in and kissed her cheek, which made both Seven and Janeway’s stomachs churn. “I have been looking all over for you.”

Janeway’s lips thinned as she made a face. “Well, you found me.” She tried to sound polite, but she was more concerned with the critical glare Seven was shooting her way. She did not like the judgmental stare, and her eyes narrowed in on the blonde’s demeanor, which had shifted from cool, icy Borg perfection to this critical and contemptuous disapproval. It brought a new fire to the Admiral’s stomach like she had never felt before.

“I won’t keep you,” Seven sneered, her tone presumptuous. She began to turn back to rejoin the group she had been with earlier.

Kathryn quietly growled as she reached out a hand to grasp her bicep. “Seven, we are not done,” she exhaled, as Seven’s head titled in annoyance.

“And why is that, Admiral?”

“Please, can we go somewhere to talk?”

“Kathryn,” Walter’s stern voice broke in. “I do believe you owe me a dance.”

The smirk Seven was giving her began to piss her off, and she clenched a fist and gritted her teeth. “Walter, can you….”

Seven cut her off. “No, no, you two go on and have fun on the dance floor,” she said airily, then her eyes darkened. “Besides, I do believe you’ve already said everything you needed to say that night in your ready room.”

“No,” Janeway protested, but Walter had slid in between them and held out his arms. “Shall we?”

Janeway pushed him aside to answer Seven, but she had already slipped back into her group. “So, who wants to dance with me?” she heard the blonde announce. Suddenly, everyone’s hands raised, and much to her surprise, Seven took hold of the hand belonging to the elegant woman standing in the back.

“God,” she heaved, her nostrils flaring as she turned back to Walter. “Let’s get this over with, BUT, one dance, and I do not owe you anything anymore. Am I clear?”

Not even a minute into the song, her eyes found Seven, and she immediately noticed how close she and the elegant woman were dancing. They seemed quite familiar with each other, as if they had already known each other. In fact, as she continued to watch them dance, she could have sworn she knew this woman as well but was unsure of how. All she was certain of was that watching Seven with this woman was driving her crazy. It was even worse than when she had to watch Seven with her former Commander.

“You are so tense, Kathryn. Is something wrong?”

“As a matter of fact, there is. I really need to talk to Seven, but instead I’m out here with you,” she informed him truthfully, not even bothering to hide her annoyance.

Walter halted his dancing and gazed down at her. “Is it that important?”

“Yes, it is,” she sighed.

“But she did not seem eager to talk with you,” he pointed out.

“No, but you see, that is on me. We didn’t part on the best of terms.”

He glanced in Seven’s direction. “She was part of your crew? On Voyager?”

“I think you know that, Walter.”

He lightly chuckled and then gently pulled away from her. “Well, then, I think I shall go get a drink so you can talk to her.”

Janeway squeezed his arm and gave him a sincere smile. “Thank you. I appreciate that.” She zeroed in on Seven, then took a breath and marched over to her.

“Mind if I cut in?”

Seven and the woman gave her matching perplexed looks, then Seven glanced at her date and nodded, but what she did next shocked the Admiral. “You two enjoy your dance. I shall go refill my champagne,” she voiced nonchalantly.

“Seven,” Janeway bit out. “We need to talk…. right now!” she barked.

Seven did not like this tone, although it was one she knew very well. Holding it together, she managed to steel her emotions behind her Borg exterior. “Okay, then talk.” She glanced at the woman she had been dancing with, who nodded as she excused herself, telling Seven she would wait for her by the bar.

“Not here,” Kathryn huffed, then proceeded to walk toward the balcony. She glanced behind her to make sure Seven was coming, and for a moment, didn’t think she was going to, but the blonde clenched her jaw and followed.

Seven tried to keep her emotions in check. She didn’t want to talk to Kathryn, did not want to hear anything she had to say. But she was curious as to what this woman could possibly want to talk about. For a brief nanosecond she felt fear ripple through her and wondered if somehow Kathryn had found out about Selene. _No, that’s not possible. The Doctor is quite aware of what I would do to him if he betrayed my confidence, and so do Chakotay and Tuvok. _

“Well, you got me here, so talk,” Seven fired, as soon as they were alone.

Kathryn took a calming breath. No matter how many years had passed, it seemed Seven would always get under her skin. “Why are you being like this?”

“Like what?”

“You’re so aloof. Cold, even.”

“Why does it even matter?”

“Seven, you were an integral member of my crew,” Janeway began. Her eyes slipped shut and she took a shaky breath before she opened them up and looked into Seven’s. “I thought we were friends,” she said softly, her eyes shining with unshed tears.

Astounded, Seven’s jaw almost dropped open. “You thought….” she started, then stopped. “I suppose I thought that as well. Then everything just changed.” She felt that familiar twinge of guilt knot in her stomach, knowing that Kathryn had no idea how much things had changed. _I have to tell her. No matter what, she needs to know. I don’t want to keep this secret from her anymore. _

Janeway flinched. “I know, and if I could go back and do things differently, I would,” she voiced.

Stunned at hearing that, Seven hesitated before she spoke. “What would you go back to? Before we landed on that planet? Before we ever met? Before I even stepped on Voyager?” Seven didn’t realize she was holding her breath in anticipation. Would Kathryn really wish to go back and erase what they had shared?

“That’s not it. Not even close, and you know that,” Janeway bit, feeling the hurt in her chest that the blonde would even go there.

“Do I?” Seven shot back.

“Yes. Deep down, I know you do.”

“I know nothing of the sort,” Seven stated, swiftly and precisely. “What I do know is that everything changed that night. I remember your words clearly. You told me to forget it, that it was a mistake, and to never bring it up again.” Her voice cracked and she took a deep breath to stay calm. “There’s so much I needed to tell you….” she faded off, as the cruel words this woman had leveled at her came flooding back. _It was a mistake. _She vividly recalled how that had broken something inside of her, and she would be die before she would allow her daughter to feel that kind of pain. _She doesn’t love me. She will hurt me. What if she can’t love Selene? I won’t let anyone hurt my child…. not even her other mother. _ She inhaled another deep breath and looked over her shoulder. “I did as I was commanded. I NEVER brought this up again, and I never will. Now, if you will excuse me, I really must be going.”

Janeway had watched Seven’s face but was unable to read the former Borg. She had carried so much guilt and regret, and now she felt worse than ever as she realized Seven was about to leave her again. “No! You can’t!” Her eyes went wide at her own outburst.

Seven glared at her. “You may be an Admiral, but you no longer have any authority over me. That tie was severed years ago,” she gritted out.

“You don’t mean that,” Janeway tried, her voice soft.

Before Seven could respond, they were interrupted by the sound of a throat clearing from behind them. Turning, she saw a few of her crew.

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but it’s time to go,” the young crewman informed her. “Picard just hailed us. We need to break orbit in seven hours.”

Seven nodded. “I will be right there.” She watched as he nodded back with worried eyes, then he shifted back around the pillar and into the room.

“I must go,” she said.

“Picard?” Janeway’s mouth opened and closed in disbelief.

“Yes. I have been promoted and assigned to the USS Enterprise. We are getting ready to embark.”

Shocked, Kathryn took a step back. “How? I mean…. when? How long?” she stammered.

“As long as it takes,” she stated firmly.

Janeway blinked, processing what she was hearing. “Wait, you were promoted?” she breathed. “You’re a lieu….tenant commander now?”

“Commander,” Seven answered. She paused and noticed the flabbergasted expression on Kathryn’s face. She seemed so…. lost. She finally dropped the wall she held up between them and actually took her all in for the first time in years. She noted she was still so very beautiful, and she wanted nothing more than to pull her in her arms and beg her to love her. But deep down she knew that was impossible. There was no way that this woman could or would ever love her like Seven desperately wanted. Nor could she love their daughter.

“It was good to see you, Capt…. Admiral,” she husked, her voice now emotional as she walked away.

Admiral Janeway could do nothing as she watched this woman walk away from her yet again.


	8. Part 8

**Part 8**

Admiral Janeway sat in her office at Starfleet, staring absentmindedly at the screen in front of her, wondering what the hell she was going to do now. She had been beside herself, desperate to talk to Seven. She had been waiting four years to speak to her, wanting nothing more than to explain and try to make things right. She had thought about what she would say and how she would express her regret, but when she actually had the chance, it didn’t even come close to how she had planned it out in her head. Clearly she had screwed that up royally.

Seven had been so cold to her. It shouldn’t have been a surprise, really, so why did Kathryn think this would be any different? She had been so cruel and harsh with her their last few weeks on Voyager, so what did she expect?

It had been a week since she watched Seven walk away from her again, and now the blonde was in another galaxy, and there wasn’t a damn thing she could do about it.

“Admiral,” the cadet greeted, as he poked his head in. “Your sister is here to see you.”

Grimacing, Kathryn paused a moment before nodding. “Send her in.”

“Hey, Sis,” Phoebe exclaimed as she bounded into the room. The younger woman’s face fell as soon as she saw her older sibling. “Whoa! What’s with the face?”

Kathryn sighed and rolled her eyes. “I have no face.”

“I know; that’s exactly what I’m talking about. So, what’s going on?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” she said, running a hand through her hair.

“Uh huh,” Phoebe grunted as she took a chair opposite Kathryn’s desk. “You know you can talk to me…. right?”

Kathryn’s eyes slipped shut momentarily. “I…” she began, then groaned and got a far off look in her eyes.

Phoebe’s lips thinned with a poignant pause. “I think I know what this is about.”

The older Janeway eyed her cautiously as she softly shook her head. “Of course you do,” she muttered dryly. “So, what is that you think you know?” she bit out.

Unfazed, Phoebe leaned back in her chair. “You must have seen her.”

The line in Kathryn’s forehead creased dramatically. “Excuse me?”

Annoyed, Phoebe sighed. “Seriously? Don’t play stupid with me. I know you, Sis, and I can see that you’re hurting. I also know that there’s only person who can affect you like this.”

“Phoebe,” Janeway warned.

Nonplussed, Phoebe just waved a hand in the air. “Oh stop. You know that authoritative look doesn’t work on me. I’m not gonna quiver in my boots like all your little cadets.”

Kathryn had been barely holding it together since seeing Seven, and everything she had been suppressing….the pain, the regret, the loss….it all just boiled over. Slamming her fist on the desk, she stood up. “I don’t know what to do! No matter how hard I try, I can’t make it go away,” she finally admitted.

Phoebe’s eyes went wide. None of this came as a surprise to her, she just never thought she’d see the day her big sister actually admitted it. Stunned, it took her a moment before she could respond. “Then stop trying. Just tell her how you feel.”

Kathryn inhaled as a tear inched its way to her eye. “I did try. She hates me,” she rasped.

Phoebe narrowed in on her sister, who was now perched at the window. She watched as she gazed across the grounds of Starfleet. “Do you honestly believe that she hates you? I mean, deep down in your heart, that’s what you really think?”

Kathryn finally turned to look at her sister and raised an eyebrow. “Uh, yes,” she fired dramatically, wondering if Phoebe was really that dense, or perhaps becoming hard of hearing

Phoebe snorted a giggle as she stood and came to her sister. She softly placed her hands on Kathryn’s biceps, forcing her to look directly at her. “If that’s true, then she obviously feels something for you.”

“Duh, she hates me.”

Once again Phoebe snickered, which she knew irritated her big sister. “Hmmm,” she hummed, placing a finger to her lips, which sported a smug smile. “You know, they say there’s a thin line between love and hate. And trust me, there is a very thin one between you and Seven,” she breathed. “It’s obvious you two love each other. You’re both just sooooo stubborn that you can’t admit it, so instead you just fight to cover it up.”

The mere suggestion that Seven loved her was so foreign to Kathryn that she quickly dismissed it and walked around her sister. “You have no idea what you’re saying. How could you? You don’t even know her. You’re just trying to make me feel better.”

“Yeah, okay, you keep telling yourself that,” Phoebe voiced with a roll of her eyes. “Go ahead and give up. In fact, stop trying and just go on and be miserable for the rest of your life. Keep going out with boring old men. That’s really working out well for you,” Phoebe exhaled harshly. She went back to the chair and picked up her bag. “Of course, the big sister that I’ve always known and looked up to always fights for what she wants. She never backs down until she gets it, and she sure as hell doesn’t let anyone stand in her way. Oh hell to the no! She fought tooth and nail to be a damned Starfleet Captain so she could explore the stars, not some Admiral who sits around a desk all day and mopes.” She paused for a moment, then went to leave, when she heard Kathryn speak. Her voice broke, and it was so soft she almost didn’t hear it.

“She’s on the Enterprise, and won’t be back for a long while.”

Phoebe turned back to glance at her. “Then damn it, Kathryn, maybe it’s time you got yourself demoted.”

Shocked, Kathryn gave her an odd look. “What?”

“You’re not a stupid woman. You know what you need to do, so go on and do it. Just go! Right now, before you talk yourself out of it.” She titled her head in thought. “In fact, I’ll tell Mom that you had no other choice….you were ordered to,” she winked.

Kathryn’s lips finally curled into a smile. It was tiny, but Phoebe noticed it just the same, and it made her own widen. She hadn’t seen that smile in years. She opened the door to leave, but unable to resist, she swiveled back. “Captain,” she grinned. “I’ll let myself out. Oh, and please call before you depart.”

Kathryn loved how that sounded. “Will do,” she nodded, feeling a rush of energy course through her veins. She had a mission, and Captain Janeway always completed her missions.

………

The USS Firebolt wasn’t Voyager, but Captain Kathryn Janeway did not mind as she shifted comfortably in her chair. She inwardly smiled as she gazed out her viewport, watching the distorted whites fly by.

The new uniform took a little to get used to, but all in all the change was good. After all, some things were worth it. She had managed to streamline her demotion, which had come as a shock to her superiors, but now she was on her first mission with Firebolt. It was a simple mission, and she knew she was on a short leash, but it didn’t matter. She was back out among the stars, and on her way to intercept a certain sovereign class ship. Well, that was her mission, not Starfleet’s, but she decided that since it was on the way, why not? Okay, maybe it was a little out of the way. Sort of.

“Captain,” her first officer interrupted her thoughts as he cleared his throat. He was Efrosian, and the way he was glaring at her made her wonder if he was angry that she had been given command of this vessel instead of him.

“Yes.” She wasn’t about to address him by his name yet, since she wasn’t certain she would get the dialect right.

“We are not on the right course to Gideaon.”

“Yes, I am well aware of that,” she answered.

He gave her a bemused look as she continued to glare at the man who had the audacity to question her authority this early into the trip. “I was…”

Not wanting to hear any of his questions, Janeway cut him off. “I have my reasons,” she voiced firmly, then stood up and raised her chin. “We are to meet up with Enterprise, and that is all you need to know. I’ll be in my ready room.”

…………

“So, Commander Hanson, since we finished early, I was thinking the away team could stop by this local establishment and get something cool to drink,” the young ensign asked with hopeful eyes.

“That would be a no,” Seven told him tightly.

“But I don’t see why…”

Annoyed, Seven remained firm. “Peace has ended here, Ensign Rigor. The opposing Narvists separatists have been demanding sovereignty from their homeland on the northern continent. Because of the terrorist attacks, any type of recreation has been strictly prohibited.”

“It looks all right to me,” he interjected, and spun around. “Why do you have to be so rigid with the rules?”

Seven gritted her teeth. This crewman was really getting on her nerves. It was like he couldn’t care less about the command structure. “If you continue to be insubordinate, Ensign, then I will be required to write you up. Do you understand?” Her voice was void of any hint of annoyance.

“I understand,” he responded.

Seven suddenly felt like something was off and she scanned the area as she drew out her phaser. “We should arm ourselves,” she commanded quietly to her away team.

Suddenly a round of arsenal flew out about them and they quickly scattered to nearby cover. Seven immediately slapped her com badge. “Seven to the Enterprise,” she breathed raggedly.

“Enterprise here.”

“We’ve been ambushed, we need to beam out.”

She didn’t hear their reply, all she could hear was the whimper coming from Ensign Rigor. “Comman…” She knew right away she needed to secure medical help for him. Just as she began to assess his injuries, two more of the Narvists came at her. She immediately dropped one with her phaser. The larger one rounded on her with his archaic sword, almost hitting her in the arm, but she managed to swiftly duck. She swung at him with her Borg enhanced fist and punched him, and it only took one hit to land him on the ground with a thud. As she was about to come at him again, she felt something hit the back of her head. Wincing, she turned on her attacker with hard eyes, when she felt the transporter, and then she rematerialized back on the ship.

Rubbing at the back of her head, Seven felt the knot, but overall she was thankful she was mostly unharmed. She quickly took in the rest of the away team, who were not so lucky. They were beaten and bloody, and she was immediately concerned for at least two of them.

Once again, she tapped her com badge. “Seven to Dr. Crusher.”

“Crusher here.”

“You need to get here right away. We have several wounded.”

“I’m on my way.”

Seven bent down next to Ensign Rigor and felt for a pulse. It was faint, and his features were sluggish as he looked at her with wide frightened eyes.

“Lie still. You will be alright.”

“I….” he muttered, then passed out.

The whoosh of the doors indicated that the doctor had arrived, and Seven turned to greet her. “Come on, I need your help,” Beverly commanded.

Seven jumped right in to assist, and was getting ready to help Beverly perform a crucial medical treatment when the com broke through.

“Picard to Dr. Crusher.”

“Go ahead,” she breathed.

“Lieutenant Marsh informed me of the situation,” Picard began. “It looks like you are needed in sickbay. Larz just coded.”

“Well, Dr. Rush will have to take care of him. I’m a little busy trying to revive a wounded body with sleight of hand. Crusher out.”

Seven knew that Beverly was the only one aboard Enterprise that could talk to Captain Picard in such a manner, and that was due to their romantic coupling. She smiled as she thought back to Voyager and how she was the one who dared to talk to Kathryn that way, although that had nothing to do with having a relationship with her. She shook her head at the realization that she really did exploit her position on Voyager, and that Captain Janeway really should have reprimanded her more than she did. Come to think of it, did Kathryn ever write her up?

She was broken out of her thoughts when her com went off. “Picard to Seven.”

“Seven here.”

“Report to the bridge; we have a situation.”

Seven eyed the doctor, and Dr Crusher nodded. “Go.”

“On my way,” Seven said and swiftly made her way to the nearest lift.

“Seven,” Picard greeted, then noticed she looked a little rough around the edges from the incident. “Are you okay?”

“I am adequate.”

“Good,” he breathed. “We are to remain in orbit. Chief Ambassador Hyrig has just requested to beam aboard to negotiate terms of our insubordination.”

Seven’s ocular implant rose somewhat. “We followed your command, Sir.”

“Yes. I know what is trying to pull, and he has no intention of negotiation. He will make demands on us that Starfleet cannot grant.”

“I do not believe he will find that acceptable.”

“No, he will not,” Picard exhaled. “How’s the saying go? Danged if you do….”

“Danged if you do not,” Seven finished for him.

Picard offered her a small smile. “Are you feeling up to another away mission?”

Seven only paused for a moment. She desperately wanted to see Selene. It had been over 48 hours since she had last seen her daughter. “Aye, Sir.”

“I want you and Security Officer Harrad to take a team to the western side. Talk to the Fredess and see if they can offer some way through this without the Federation getting more involved.” He watched as Seven turned to leave. “You better go heavily armed this time,” he added.

Seven nodded and then left the bridge with Harrad, after which they headed straight to the armory.

Picard blew out a breath before the com rang out. “Chief Ambassador Hyrig requests permission to beam aboard.”

“Granted,” he said firmly, then cut the transmission and turned towards one of the crew man. “Escort him to conference room one.” He got up from the chair. “Seven, I sure hope you find a solution soon,” he muttered under his breath.

Picard delayed going into the conference room as long as he could. When he finally entered, he greeted his arrogant guest, ready to hear him out.

“Captain?” the voice came from the com.

“I am in a very important meeting.”

“Sir, Seven needs to speak with you. Privately.”

He nodded his head and stood. “I am sorry about this. Please excuse me. I’ll be right back.”

Hyrig’s large nostrils flared even bigger and he glared. “The longer this takes, Captain, the more people will die.”

“Understood,” Picard said evenly and left the room. “Go ahead, Seven,” he said tapping his com badge.

“I have some leads here, I just need you to stall a little bit longer.”

Picard gritted his teeth. “Hurry up, Commander.” He cut the transmission and was about to head back in the room.

“Bridge to the Captain.”

“Yes.”

“We have a ship approaching.”

“Red alert,” he commanded. Picard eyed the conference room and knew he would have to wait. This ship was more important.

As soon as he entered the bridge he noticed the ship, and right away he smiled.

“We are being hailed.”

“Open a channel.”

“Sorry to just show up unannounced, but it looks to me like you might need some help.”

“It is very welcomed, Captain.”

“Request to come aboard?”

“Request granted.”

The transmission ended and he turned to his ready room. “Send in Captain Janeway as soon as she arrives.”


	9. Part 9

**Part 9**

“So, what brings you to this part of space, Captain?” Picard narrowed in on her. “It is Captain, right?”

“Yeah. You have to know I was always destined to be up here, not confined to a boring office.”

“Yes,” he nodded. “Actually, I knew it was just a matter of time.”

Janeway smirked. “Maybe you knew before I did,” she sighed.

“So,” he began, getting right to the point. “I take it you’re here because you heard about our little situation?”

Janeway internally cringed, knowing full well that was not the reason for this visit. “Well, to be honest,” she swallowed, then paused as she contemplated how to explain.

He quirked an eyebrow and offered a smile, and it was one that the redhead was certain she had never seen before. “I see,” he interrupted. “Well, you’re here now, and we really could use your assistance.”

“Then I am happy to help.”

“So, tell me Kathryn, do I need let Starfleet know that you are here?”

Janeway scratched at her ear. “I guess that is totally up to you,” she answered, discomfort in her tone.

“So, this must be urgent? Vital part of your mission?” Picard teased.

Janeway was in unchartered territory. She had never gone rogue before; she was always strictly by the book. In fact, this was so foreign to her, and she was so out of sorts that she wasn’t entirely sure what to say to that. “Yes,” she finally blurted, somewhat breathlessly.

“Oh?” he looked at her lazily then turned to his desk and looked down at a PADD.

“I think you know, or not. I don’t know, I just had to. I’ll probably getting reprimanded. But I just have this feeling in me that this needs to be done.” She blinked at what she said, unsure if she was even making sense. 

He lowered his head and sighed, even if his lips held a comical smile. “Well you’ll have to wait.”

“Wait?” Janeway blinked, her face clueless as her heart pounded in her chest.

Picard couldn’t contain his soft chuckle. “We are talking about the same thing here, are we not?”

All this small talk and going around in circles was driving Kathryn crazy. She just didn’t care anymore, protocols be damned. “I’m here to see Seven,” she finally stated, her eyes firm and there was nothing short about the command tone that was evident in her voice.

Picard now grinned inwardly. “Yes, that’s exactly why I said you’d have to wait,” he bantered.

Janeway wasn’t having any of it. “I know she is part of your crew. This is very important. Please, I’m just asking for a few minutes of her time.”

Picard moved around his desk and leaned back on it, crossing his arms. “I can see that. But you do realize she is not just a member of this crew, but an essential part of it. She is my first officer, my new number one in fact.”

Somehow that hit Janeway harder than she expected. “I …” she swallowed. “I understand. I just need like ten minutes with her…tops.”

His eyes squinted for a moment, then he grinned again. “You can have longer, but like I said, you’ll have to wait. You see, she is on the surface and isn’t back aboard yet.”

Janeway wanted to growl from being teased like this. All he needed to say was she isn’t on the ship right now. “I see.” She now couldn’t hide her own smile. “You were toying with me.”

“I was just being honest, Captain,” he breathed. “If you don’t mind, I have a few things I need to go over, and now that you are here, we will be needing that assistance from you.”

“Understood.”

“In the meantime why don’t you go spend time in our new conservatory. The kids on the ship love it,” he winked.

She gave him an odd look. “Um… okay.”

“I am sure Seven will be back here in an hour or two.” He grabbed the PADD he was looking at earlier. “Go get a bite to eat, have a few minutes to relax.”

“All right, I’ll take you up on that,” she said, then turned to leave but swayed back. “Thank you.”

“Kathryn, it is not a problem. Just make sure that I get an invite,” he smiled broadly and then winked again.

She gave him an odd look before she headed out. She was on her way to the nearest lounge, but something in the way Picard looked at her made her turn and take the lift that brought her to the conservatory. 

She stepped out and was in total awe as she absorbed the area. All sort of plant life was growing, and in its midst was a small playground and some tables. Off to the right she saw a few kids who looked like they were playing the old game of kick ball. She smiled as she took a spot on the nearest picnic table.

It wasn’t long before an automated server swung around to her. “What will it be, ma’am?”

“Coffee black.”

“Right away,” the computer chirped.

As soon as her lips touch the hot liquid, she was interrupted. “Hello.”

Blinking, she looked across the table into beautiful blue eyes….eyes that reminded her of someone….followed by the cutest smile. “Well hello to you.”

The small child crossed her arms and narrowed in sharply at her. “I don’t recall seeing you here before.” Her gaze now landed on the insignia on her uniform and those blue eyes went wide. “You…” she studied again before finishing. “You are a captain?”

“Very perceptive,” Janeway said, sporting a sly grin. “Do you always talk to strangers?” she asked, looking around for her parent.

“You are aboard our ship, sporting a captain’s uniform. How can that be? There is only one captain aboard this vessel, and you are not Jon Luc,” she interrogated.

Kathryn eyed the little girl for a moment, wondering how it was that this girl was on a first name basis with the captain, and how inquisitive she was for how young she looked. “Oh?”

The girl’s eyes sharpened, and something about them haunted Janeway. In fact, she had this sinking feeling that she shouldn’t tease her, that she should just be honest. “You are right, I’m from another vessel. I am just visiting.”

That seemed to appease the girl. “Oh well, then I should welcome you. Hi, welcome to the Starship Enterprise.”

This made Janeway smile as she took a sip of her coffee. “Well thank you. And you are?”

“I am Selene, and I am here with my school.” The girl offered her hand after she pointed in the direction of what looked like a small group of children.

“Well,” Kathryn now stretched her hand out and gently shook the little girl’s. “It’s nice to meet you. I am Kathryn.”

Selene rocked back. “Really?” Her eyes went wide again.

“Yes,” Janeway drawled.

Selene hesitated as a huge smile split her lips. “I am Kathryn too, well my middle name is.”

Janeway was enthralled with this child, and couldn’t contain her soft chuckle. “It is a good name.” She now observed the other kids that were clearly in Selene’s class and then looked at the girl across from her, narrowing in on her. “Hey, aren’t you a little young to be in school? Or am I seeing this wrong?” She slightly laughed. “I am getting older and I could be just needing glasses.”

That made Selene giggle. “You are correct, I am a lot younger. I am just really advanced for my age and I hated being in the preschool. It’s so for babies.”

“I can see that.” Kathryn took another swig of her drink. “So, is your mom or dad here with you?”

Right away Selene looked sad, and she puffed out a long breath. “No,” she sighed.

“Oh why not?” Kathryn didn’t want to overstep, but she also didn’t want a parent getting upset that their daughter went off by herself talking to a complete stranger. So she looked over her shoulder just in case.

Selene watched her and her forehead furrowed somewhat. “She’s actually on assignment.”

“Ah,” Janeway breathed.

“Been gone for a few days now. I really miss her.”

“So your mother is on assignment,” Kathryn guessed then wondered even further. “And your father?”

“I don’t have a father.” The girl shrugged. “I have some cool uncles, but no father.”

That tore at Kathryn’s heart, and she had no idea why. She also had no clue why she was sitting here talking to her. Maybe because she had a few hours to kill. “I’m sorry.”

Selene shrugged again. “It’s okay.” She then watched as Janeway took another sip of her drink. “Is that coffee?”

Captain Janeway eyed her drink, then Selene. “It is, why?”

“May I have a little?”

Kathryn scrunched up her nose. “I don’t think you’d like it.”

“Actually I have it all the time. It’s just that this teacher thinks I should only drink what is provided today.”

“Your mother lets you have coffee?”

“Of course, it keeps you sharp,” the girl lied, as she smiled sassily.

That forced Kathryn to jerk back, and that simple phrase seemed to taunt at her. She knew that Selene was lying to her, but she was so damn cute she felt powerless to resist. All she could do was slide her mug slowly across the table. “Just a little.”

Selene moaned into the liquid, as if she had been in a desert and this was her first sip of water. She took one more swallow before she slid it back to her. “Thank you so much,” she said dramatically.

“You’re welcome.”

“I like you, Captain Kathryn.”

“I like you too, Selene.” Janeway said. “And thank you for keeping me company while I wait for my friend.”

“Who you waiting for?”

“An old friend. Captain Picard said she is on the surface, but she is due back any minute.”

“What’s her name?”

Janeway didn’t think anything of it and just shrugged. “Well, her name is Seven, she’s your sh…..”

“Mom!” Selene jumped up as soon as she heard the conservatory doors open and saw her mother appear, a look of shock and apprehension on her face.

Kathryn blinked, and understood she was referring to her actual mother as she watched her dart around her to the other side of the room.

Janeway could hear the girl’s happy squeal of laughter as she took another sip of her coffee, then a familiar voice telling Selene she missed her so much. It made the tiny hairs on the back of her neck slightly raise. She had this sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. She had to gather a breath before she could turn to see who Selene’s mother was, but somehow deep inside she already knew.

Now it seemed Kathryn couldn’t even catch her breath as she drew in the sight of mother and daughter in a tight embrace. “No,” she whispered somewhat choked up, not sure she was seeing it all clearly. “How…did she say…” she trailed off as she now found herself standing as she continued to stare.

It was such a beautiful sight seeing them embracing and smiling at one another. She felt like a voyeur and thought about turning away, yet she found herself frozen. She was finally here, and the reason she was on this ship was now standing a few feet away. _What’s it been Kathryn a few months since you saw her last? And she still takes your breath away. _

Then as if a bolt of lightning hit her she snapped out of her love sick coma and finally realized that Seven has a daughter. _SEVEN HAS A DAUGHTER!_ _How could it be? _

Anger boiled up through her veins as she watched her interact with Selene and it was clear as the day was long, that this beautiful girl was Seven’s biological child. _How did I miss that?_

Her eyes sharpened on them as she drank them in_. Chakotay! _She thought, bile rising up in her throat. _He must be the father_. Even thinking it, she still questioned it. _Selene said she didn’t have a father. If not Chakotay, then who damn it?!_ She thought as she ground her teeth together. She now noticed them in conversation and a glance in her direction seemed to simmer her down some. Besides, what right did she have to be angry about this? Seven had her own life after Voyager, and why shouldn’t she? After all, Kathryn was the one who pushed her away. She tried to reason with herself, but felt the flutter in her chest at the annoyance that she hadn’t even bothered to tell her about Selene.

All this was going through her head as she now saw Seven really looking her over. That same electric smolder that would do her in all those years ago still had that same effect on her now. Seven’s face was a mixture of surprise and something else that she couldn’t quite name. She could swear she could see a shimmering of tears as the ex-Borg sauntered closer.

“Admiral,” she greeted as coolly and calmly as she could, but in the back of her mind kept wondering what Admiral Janeway was doing on the Starship Enterprise. At the same time, she was actually glad to see her this time. The weight of the secret had been gnawing at her, and she knew it was time. The blonde’s heart was bursting with the knowledge that Janeway had finally seen her own child…their child. She couldn’t hide the tears in her eyes even if she had wanted to. She wasn’t sure what Kathryn knew, or how… all she knew was that this time had finally come. _It is now or never._ Seven thought. _She needs to know._

Janeway cleared her throat as she stared at Seven. “It’s Captain now,” she told her directly, a hint of resentment laced in her tone.

Seven glanced at her insignia then back into her eyes. “My apologies, Captain.”

They were at a stand still, both unsure how to proceed, but then Selene did it for them. “That’s my new friend. She even has my name,” she said softly yanking on her mother’s hand.

Seven felt that like a knife to her chest and wanted to cringe, but stood tall and never let on. “What are you doing here?” she asked instead.

Kathryn gazed at Seven noticing how different she looked now. She was still beautiful as ever, but now she held a confidence that was even more striking. It appeared that motherhood agreed with Seven. It made her something entirely new, making her seem even more irresistible to Kathryn. Not just to her, but she knew that everyone that would even look her way would find her absolutely stunning.

She just couldn’t get over it, as she stared at Seven’s and Selene’s connected hands. She drew in a breath, and then another. “Why didn’t you tell me?” she finally spat, louder than she wanted.

Seven calmly inhaled. “Maybe we should go somewhere else to talk about this,” she said as she surveyed the area once a few heads popped up and looked their way with Kathryn’s outburst.

Janeway’s nostrils flared. “You bet we will,” she stated firmly. “Lead the way,” she grated.

Seven turned, still holding Selene’s hand. “This way.” They quietly walked out of the conservatory and onto the lift. Once Seven told which deck, the lift began to move, and Selene cautiously looked up at the adults, then leaned into her mother.

“Why is she mad at you, Mommy?” she whispered with worried eyes.

Kathryn wanted to roll her eyes at herself for making this sweet innocent girl so uncomfortable. She knew it wasn’t her fault and she wanted clear the air, so she bent down so she was eye level with Selene. “I’m not mad, honey. I am just sad that your mother didn’t trust me enough to tell me about you. I thought we were friends.”

It took all of Seven’s training not to turn on her former Captain for blaming this all on her, and to her daughter even! Instead she took a settling breath. “We were friends, Captain. Were is the operative word here,” she fired calmly. “As in past tense.” She leveled a pointed look at the other woman, then dropped her gaze down to Selene and back to Kathryn. Seeing them together, this close, she saw even more similarities between the two, and it hit her, making her go quiet.

“I’m sorry, Selene. I’m not mad. I just need to talk to your mother,” Kathryn smiled at her, then stood back up and straightened her uniform. Soon as the lift opened they walked quietly as they rounded the corner, then entered a room and right away she knew it was Seven’s and Selene’s quarters. It was very neat, except for a few toys scattered on the floor. Seven quickly bent over and held them out for the little girl. “What did I tell you about leaving your toys out?”

“Not to. Sorry Mommy,” she said, and took them from her mother’s hands than ran off toward her room.

“What did I tell you about running in our quarters?”

“Not to,” Selene yelled, and Janeway didn’t miss the way Seven looked to the ceiling, before shaking her head.

“And yelling,” she exhaled softly before turning back to Kathryn. “Would you care for something to drink?”

Kathryn’s heart felt like it was going to burst at the scene in front of her. It took everything in her not let it get to her, after all, she was still angry here. “No,” Janeway snarled. She wasn’t in the mood for pleasantries. “How?” she fired first, her breath coming out raggedly. “And how did I not know this?” She ran a hand through her hair. “You were my friend, part of my crew….” She trailed off as the emotions were getting to her. Tears filled her eyes and she heatedly pushed them back. “We were more,” she vaguely said then closed her eyes and shook her head. She was determined to not go there, not now. “And why isn’t Chakotay part of her life?”

Seven paused and gathered some short breaths as she examined her former Captain, her confidant, mentor and yes, her friend. She was more than that at one time, hell if she was honest she knew she would always be more.

“Well,” she began. “One, after I examined all the evidence it came down to the water, but mostly it was the planet we were on. Two, you said it was a mistake, and she will never be a mistake. Not to me, not ever,” she told her shaking her head. “She is everything. Yes we were friends, but then you distanced yourself and told me to move on.” She ignored the more part, because that was just giving her mixed signals. “And lastly he is part of her life.”

That wasn’t at all what Kathryn expected and she wasn’t sure if she had even heard any of it right. She gritted her teeth, and growled. “God damn it Seven tell me the truth.”

“Fine,” Seven inhaled, her eyes softening as she stepped closer to the smaller woman. “Kathryn, Selene, that little girl in there….she is your daughter.”


	10. Part 10

**Part 10**

“Kathryn, Selene, that little girl in there…she is your daughter.”

“Kathryn,” Seven said after a few seconds of silence went by. Janeway swayed back on her heels, pinning her with a confounded look. “She’s yours,” she tried again, her head dipping slightly as she tried to maintain eye contact with the smaller woman.

Another moment passed before the redhead blinked and shook her head. “What-why?” She swallowed. “Why would you say something like that?”

“Because it’s the truth, and to be honest, it is something I should have told you long before now.” Her voice softened, her tone full of regret. “I am truly sorry about that. She’s your daughter.”

Her head spinning, Janeway blinked, then her eyes hardened and narrowed angrily. “That’s impossible. It’s absurd. Why would you lie to me about that?” she hissed. “Tell me the truth, Seven. I believe you owe me that much.”

Seven knew that this was going to be difficult, so she inhaled a calm breath and reached for the nearest PADD. She retrieved Selene’s data, then looked back at the other woman. “Kathryn, I know this is a lot to take in, and I wish I knew what to say to make this easier for you…. help you make sense of it all,” she told her. “All I can do is show you her genetic coding.” She handed the PADD to her former captain. “It’s all right here. Half of her DNA code is mine, the other, as you can see, is yours.”

Janeway hesitated for a moment before finally relenting, jerking the device out of Seven’s hands to look for herself. “What do you think I am….an idiot? You are very intelligent, not to mention efficient and resourceful. You could manipulate this in your sleep,” she bit, with iciness in her tone. She had no earthly idea why Seven would do this…why she would even say something so outrageous. It was impossible. There was absolutely no scientific way this could be true. _Unless…._

She continued to scan the information in front of her, which appeared to confirm what Seven was claiming. She instantly felt sick to her stomach, and her chest ached to the point she thought she might be having a heart attack. _This is wrong. It has to be. It’s a trick; she manipulated the whole thing._ Her mind was racing as she continued to think about it. _But why would she do that?_

“This isn’t even evidence,” she breathed raggedly. Her head was now spinning, and she dropped the PADD to the floor as she placed a steady hand on the side wall to balance herself.

All Seven could do was stand there and watch Janeway spin out of control as she tried to process this. She knew it wouldn’t be easy to convince Kathryn, hell, she recalled her own disbelief when the Doctor had informed her. Still, she had no idea Kathryn would take it this bad. Her heart longed to reach out and comfort her, yet the logical part of her cortical node kept her still. As tough as she was, the cruel words and accusations filtering out of the other woman’s mouth were painful to hear. She was hurt and shocked that after all they had been through, Kathryn would actually think she would lie to her about this.

She took a deep breath and tried again. “Kathryn, you need to listen to me…. really listen.” She paused and waited for Janeway to look back over at her. “I understand that this is a lot to take in, I do. But no matter what has happened, no matter what you think of me, I swear to you that I would not lie to you,” she told her. “I didn’t plan this. You see, I thought I was sick, and when the Doctor told me I was carrying a child, well, I was just as shocked as you were. I was convinced he had to be mistaken.”

“Oh, please. You couldn’t have been that shocked. Surely you had to think it was Chakotay’s baby,” Janeway threw at her.

Seven recoiled at both the words and the venom in which they were delivered. She then cringed and looked over her shoulder to make sure Selene was still in her room and out of earshot. Turning back to Kathryn, she leveled her with a firm glare. “You need to lower your voice,” she commanded. “Can you please remain calm?”

Kathryn felt a pang of remorse deep in her chest at the thought of that beautiful child in the other room and her heart lurched at what that little girl might think of her. The last thing she wanted to do was upset Seven’s daughter. She put a hand up to her forehead as the thought occurred to her that if what she was being told was indeed the truth, that very well could be HER daughter as well. Her nostrils flared as she drew in a sharp breath. “Given what you’ve just told me, this is my calm,” she voiced, but her tone was lower and softer.

Seven narrowed in on the other woman. “I understand, but you need to understand something as well. Of course, I didn’t think the baby was his, in fact, the thought never entered my mind. You see, Captain, I am quite aware of how one gets pregnant, and I never, I repeat, NEVER had physical relations with Chakotay,” she exhaled. “Of course, I would think the Doctor was wrong.”

Kathryn felt a mixture of relief and then hurt at hearing that. “Then who else did you sleep with, then, because I’m quite certain that two women could not conceive a child.”

Seven did not respond, she just cocked an eyebrow at her. Kathryn was incorrect, in this day and age, it was indeed quite possible, although usually it happened in a lab and the embryo is implanted into one of the mothers.

As if on cue, Janeway’s head snapped up and fire laced her eyes. “Did you do something…. did you steal my….”

Enraged, Seven immediately threw a hand up and closed the distance between them, coming face to face with the smaller woman. “Don’t you dare! My integrity is central to my humanity,” she spat. “If you truly think that I would do something like that, then you should just go. Go on and live your life and forget about us,” she spewed.

“Then how did this happen?” Kathryn glared back. “Because none of what you are suggesting is possible!”

Seven was furious but managed to maintain her composure. “If you would let me talk without going crazy, then I will explain it to you.” She now took a step back, her eyes blazing with hurt and anger. “Otherwise, you can just go.” She now had an arrogant smirk on her face as she tilted her head and leveled Kathryn with an icy glare. “In fact, how about we just call this a good old-fashioned mistake and pretend like it never happened. We can just forget it and never speak of it again. As I recall, you’re really good at that,” she challenged.

Kathryn felt like she had just been slapped in the face. In fact, never had any words hit her so hard. The air left her lungs and she winced as her head rocked back. “Seven,” she tried in a low tone. She paused for a moment, allowing herself to gather her wits before splaying her hands out in front of her as a peace offering. “I know,” she began, but then stopped, not having a clue what to say in this moment.

Realizing that Kathryn had no response, Seven shook her head. “Just go,” she voiced.

Janeway did not move, she just stood there, staring at the blonde. “If she is mine, then I have rights,” she finally said.

All composure left Seven’s features as she narrowed in on the older woman. “If she is yours? IF?” She shook her head in exasperation and waved a finger at Janeway. “If you don’t want her, then go, because I will not have my daughter be rejected by anyone…. including you!”

“Mommy!” Selene’s voice called out from the other room. “I’m hungry!”

“Give me just a minute,” Seven answered, then turned back to Kathryn. “It doesn’t matter, you wouldn’t believe me anyway.” She nodded towards the door. “You need to go now,” she demanded. “I need to be with my daughter.” Without another word, she turned and left Kathryn just standing there in the empty room.

Kathryn looked towards Selene’s door, then her gaze moved to the holographic images of Selene and Seven, and a few of just Selene alone. She saw it now…. clear as ever. Dizzily she spun around and actually did what she was told and left Seven’s quarters. She walked a few feet before she doubled over and started to cry. “That little girl is mine,” she sobbed. She knew deep in her heart that everything Seven had told her was true, just as she knew that Seven would never lie to her. Besides, she knew firsthand that stranger things have happened, so why was it so hard to believe that she had fathered…. she quickly corrected herself….mothered a child with Seven. After all, they did make love over and over on that strange planet.

“Oh my god, I have a daughter,” she whispered to herself, amazement and awe in her voice. “A daughter,” she repeated, then squeezed at the bridge of her nose and took a breath. “Now what do I do?”

………………

“Mommy, where did Captain Kathryn go?”

Seven sadly sighed. “She had to go.”

“But she didn’t say goodbye.” Selene looked up at her mother. “Why were you guys fighting? Was it because of me? Did I do something?” she asked with a forlorn pout on her face. It was an expression that always tugged at Seven’s heart.

Seven closed her eyes and grimaced. She wasn’t one to lie to her daughter, but how would she explain this? “You didn’t do anything,” she reassured her. “She was upset with me because I never told her about you.”

“Well, why didn’t you tell her?” she inquired, curious blue eyes looking expectantly for an answer.

“Oh, lots of reasons, but mostly I was too scared to,” she admitted sorrowfully.

That seemed to confuse Selene, and her brow furrowed, and it reminded Seven of someone else’s features. “But Mommy, you are never scared.”

Seven ran her fingers over her daughter’s soft hair. “Well, I was,” she told her truthfully.

“Are you scared now?”

Seven tried to keep her face even as she gazed at the best thing that had ever happened to her. “Yes,” and she really was. She was so worried about what Kathryn would do now. “Let’s move on, shall we? Let’s decide what to make for dinner.”

“Noodles.” The girl jumped up with excitement. Her eyes widened. “Oh, can we have cookies too?”

“Noodles it is,” Seven said and was grateful that Selene could let it go so easily. She wished she could do the same. “And I suppose we can have cookies too.” She knew they would be having this conversation again; she just didn’t know how long that would be.

……….

Kathryn meandered to the nearest lounge. She knew she should just transport back to her own ship, make up some excuse to break orbit and move on. Yet deep in her heart she knew that would be running and damn it she was a Starfleet captain. She had never run away from anything and was not about to start now…. especially from her own daughter.

She groaned as she leaned her head in her hand, knowing full well she did indeed run once. Back in the Delta Quadrant she ran as fast as she could from Seven and her feelings toward her. If she would just have been honest with Seven and herself, she wouldn’t be in this predicament right now.

A small smile graced her lips as she thought about the what ifs. Where would they be now? Well, one thing she knew for sure, she would definitely be a part of that little girl’s life, there was not a doubt in her mind about that. What about Seven…. would be they be raising her together? Like a real family?

Kathryn sighed heavily into her drink, her mind racing with everything she had just learned. She and Seven had made a baby together. Selene was a result of the time they spent on that planet together. _My god, the passion._ _No wonder we have a kid. That sex was so good, we altered the laws of science. _She blew out a heated breath as she recalled how they had made love, and as the memories flashed through her, no matter how angry she was at Seven, her body shivered at the intimate parts reawakened in her.

She knew she needed to stop after the second drink, but she also knew she needed to see Seven, and most of all Selene. Selene was her daughter, too. What right did Seven have to keep that from her and push her away? No right whatsoever!

Janeway slammed her glass down on the bar and was leaving to go tell Seven as much, when she ran into the one person she had had really wanted to avoid on this ship, but right now, she didn’t know why.

“Beverly,” she greeted a little sluggishly.

“I heard you were here,” the doctor said lightly.

“I was just on my way out.”

Beverly examined her skeptically. “Oh, and where you off to?”

“To see my daughter,” Janeway seethed, and started to walk away.

Beverly rolled her eyes and maneuvered around so she could block the petite yet wiry captain. “I think perhaps we should get a table and grab a bite to eat. Maybe some coffee.” She could see that Captain Janeway was not convinced. “Come on, Picard is busy. In fact, I think he is in a conference, and I know for a fact that Seven is with him. Besides, I would hate to eat alone.”

Janeway relented with a groan and found her way to a table in the far corner. She didn’t even protest when the doctor ordered for her.

“So, I’m glad you are here to lend us a hand.”

“I haven’t done anything,” Kathryn hiccupped. Her eyes narrowed, then she suddenly jumped to her feet. “Wait a second, I should be in that conference, too. I’m a god damned captain,” she fired somewhat listlessly, her head suddenly spinning.

Beverly saw how unsteady she was and reached up to tug her back down. “How many have you had, dear?”

Kathryn pressed her hand against her pounding temple. “Two,” she slurred.

“Only two?” Beverly questioned.

Come to think of it, Kathryn was not entirely sure how much she had drank. She slouched back in the chair. “Shit,” she cursed haphazardly.

Beverly chuckled lightly. “Are you okay? I am a good listener, you know.”

Janeway paused as she looked at the other woman. “I wouldn’t even know where to start,” she finally managed.

“How about you start with why are here?” she offered.

“I’m here to help the Enterprise,” Kathryn lied.

“Uh huh,” Beverly shook her head. “Now, what is the real reason? Because I’m pretty sure that you left a mission that Starfleet thinks you are completing right now as we speak. It’s not like you to leave your post, Captain,” she smiled.

Abashed, Janeway swiveled her head and averted her gaze. “Long story,” she barely got out.

Beverly crossed her arms and tilted her head. “Hmm, let me guess,” she began. “You are here because you wanted to see our First Officer, and I’m guessing you just heard some unsettling news, and right now you’re not sure if you are staying or going. How’s that?” she smirked.

Janeway’s head snapped back around and her nostrils flared as she gritted her teeth. “You knew?” she fired, as she stood back up. “Tell me, did everyone know? Am I the only god damned fool here?” She was pissed, and she harshly shoved the chair back and pushed herself around the table and through a few patrons.

It happened so fast that Beverly couldn’t react, so she did the only thing she could think of.

“Crusher to Picard,” she announced, with the flick of her badge.

“Picard here.”

“We have a situation here.”

“Go on.”

“Janeway is a little inebriated, and a little irate. She just stormed out of here and I believe she is on a mission to find a certain someone,” she informed.

“Thanks for letting me know. Picard out.”

Seven was with him and heard the exchange. “I will go find her,” she told him.

He nodded. “Do me a favor and go easy on her. She just had some life altering news. Try to put yourself in her shoes,” he advised.

Seven nodded as well and turned to leave. “Oh, and Seven? Make it quick. We are due on the surface at 0900 hours.”

“Yes Sir,” she acknowledged, and internally grimaced as she made her way to intercept Captain Janeway, knowing and yet not knowing what to expect. She searched through all her available databases and came up short as to what she was going to do once she finally did find her.


	11. Part 11

**Part 11**

Seven of Nine strode briskly and purposefully down the corridor after the computer had informed her of Captain Janeway's current location. Inhaling deeply, she entered Cargo Bay 2, and right away her eyes sought her out. There she was, sitting on the nearest bulkhead, her head reclined back. The look on her face tore at Seven's heart as she stepped closer and cleared her throat, announcing her presence.

Kathryn slowly turned her head toward her. "Oh, it's you," she said unevenly. She had desperately wanted a moment just like this….the two of them alone….and now that they were here, she could not control the feelings of animosity towards the blonde.

Seven eyed her for a mere moment, and without saying a word, took a few steps even closer. "Why are you in here?" she softly asked. She couldn't help but wonder why of all the places on the Enterprise, she would come to Cargo Bay 2.

"Oh, I don't know. What do you even care?" Janeway snarled, twisting haphazardly as she began to climb down from where she was perched.

On instinct, Seven reached forward to help balance the unsteady woman, only to have her hands slapped away.

"Don't," she hissed.

"I was just trying to assist you."

"I'm fine," Kathryn huffed, pulling down on her uniform as soon as she balanced herself.

"Yeah," Seven breathed sarcastically. "I can see that."

Janeway rubbed at her face, feeling the effects of the alcohol she had consumed. "Ugh," she muttered as she slightly stumbled back.

"I have a hypospray," Seven offered, holding up the device. "May I?" she asked, gesturing to the other woman.

Janeway's eyes hardened as she pulled in a few breaths. "Why?" she asked, her face a mixture of sorrow and disdain.

Seven knew she was not referring to the hypospray. "I realize that I may have misjudged the situation," she admitted. "I did what I thought was right, but I see that was not the case. And for that, all I can say is that I am truly sorry."

Kathryn turned away, unable to look at her right now. Her heart felt as if it had been torpedoed into a million pieces, and she felt completely lost. She swallowed and made a face as the blonde took a step towards her.

Her own heart breaking, Seven tried to ignore it as she continued to try to help the older woman. She moved in closer, holding out a steady hand and the hypospray. "Let me," she rasped, holding up the device.

Janeway finally conceded with a slight nod.

"Do you have preference on which side?" Seven gently asked.

"Does it even matter?" Kathryn commented sharply. She then kinked her head to the side and allowed Seven to insert the device to her skin. Seven was so close, she couldn't help but breathe her in. In fact, it was the closest she had been to this woman in years, and although she internally chastised herself for even thinking like that, she felt her own body betray her as it desperately longed to gravitate even closer to her.

Janeway was thankful once she felt the serum fill her system, and it didn't take long for her to feel the effects and get her bearings about her. It was only then that she realized just how close she was to Seven. Now, with clear eyes, she found herself gazing up at Seven, and the way she was looking at her completely threw her off, and she immediately took a few steps back.

"Damn it," she huffed, annoyed that regardless of how angry she was, this woman could still bring out these feelings in her. She didn't like how out of control that made her feel.

"Captain?"

"Seven," she growled. "You betrayed me in the worst possible way. How can we possibly ever come back from this?"

Surprised at the outburst, Seven firmed her jaw and quickly rested her hands behind her back.

"Come back?" Seven questioned firmly. "Who said we would, or even want to come back?" she quipped nonchalantly.

"We have a daughter, I think that requires us to be able to reach some sort of agreement."

"Does it?" Seven's voiced remained calm and poised, and it was so Borg like it pissed the Captain off even more.

"I'm her mother. I have a right to be in her life," Kathryn fired. "She has the right to know me, too."

Seven paused as she pondered that. "She deserves a mother that will be there for her, not one that will decide later that it's too much, or one that prioritizes her command over everything else. We both know that your command will always come first." Her eyes flashed as she leveled a challenging glare at the older woman. "What she doesn't deserve, and what I will never allow, is for you or anyone else to ever tell her that she was a mistake. I can't risk letting you do that to her, Kathryn," she heaved as tears filled her eyes. "That little girl is my entire world, and the instant that I found out I was pregnant with her, I vowed that I would protect her and keep her safe no matter what," she cried, her voice thick with emotion.

Taken aback, Kathryn flinched and her eyes momentarily went wide before she sharply narrowed them back in on the former Borg. "You actually think so little of me, that I would do that to her?" she asked incredulously. "I would do anything for her," she breathed. "Hell, Seven, I would do anything for you, too," she admitted.

Seven raised her chin. "Those are nice words, but your history indicates otherwise," she stated evenly.

Livid, Janeway snarled as she took a forceful step towards her. "I came after you time and time again. I risked both my ship and my entire crew for you, I put my command and my career, hell, even my life on the line for you more times than I can count. So don't you dare say I never did anything for you."

Seven knew she was right, this woman did risk everything for her. Her eyes softened as she exhaled. "You are correct. You did so much for me, you rescued me, helped me gain my humanity. I actually believed that I was special to you," she acknowledged, then took a shaky breath. "But," she began, and her tone dropped an octave and softened even more. "Just as quickly and easily as you gave me all that, you took it all away. You were the only person that I trusted, that I believed in, and it took you all of what….maybe five minutes…to throw me away. Even before that night, you distanced yourself from me." Her voice broke as she tried to ward off the tears that seemed caught in her throat. "You didn't even want to be my friend anymore," she choked out, hurt and vulnerability in her features.

Kathryn inhaled a deep breath, trying to ignore the pain she felt in her chest as she pinched the bridge of her nose. "I don't know what to do, Seven. You've really put me in a corner here," she said, her voice now rough. "All these years, you didn't once think that I had a right to know about her? My god, I've missed so much of her life already," she cried, her voice shaking with emotion as tears glossed over her eyes. "And I can never get that back."

Seven's entire core ached at the raw pain radiating off the other woman, acutely aware of all that Selene's other mother had missed out on. "I wanted to tell you. Honestly, I planned to, many times," she told her. "Not long after she was born I was going to write you and tell you about her. From the moment she was born, I saw so much of you in her. I still do." It pained her to tell Kathryn this, but she knew she had to be honest. "She has your nose, your ears, your…."

Kathryn was now sobbing as she felt the pain deep in her chest. This was too much; she couldn't bear to hear another word. She quickly threw a hand up to cut her off. "Then why? Why didn't you?" she fired heatedly. "You knew how to get in touch with me." The remorse she saw in Seven's eyes made her blood burn with fury. "Don't give me that look," she said flatly.

Seven blinked away her tears and continued. "I had sat down to write it, then I saw an image of you in Starfleet's social media. You looked so happy, and they said you were about to get married," she admitted. "I deemed that there was no point in disrupting your life with a child."

"No point? Are you serious? You're telling me you decided to keep this life altering information from me because of some stupid gossip rag?" Kathryn groaned, clearly irritated. "I can't believe this." She ran a hand through her hair and groaned again. "I am so disappointed in you, Seven." She shook her head as she glared at the blonde. "I had to come all the way across space to find you in order for you to even tell me. I would still be in the dark if I hadn't come here," she heaved, then added as an afterthought. "I put my career on the line for you…..yet again, and you couldn't even give me the benefit of telling me the truth before now," she voiced loudly, anger and sorrow very evident in her features. "Tell me, Seven, if I hadn't met her in the conservatory, would you have still kept her from me?"

"Kathryn…." Seven softly tried.

"No!" Janeway interjected, her tone even more firm. "You should have pulled me aside at that party and told me then. You owed me that!"

A myriad of expressions flashed across Seven's face, none of which were pleasant, before she finally dipped her head, and Janeway steeled herself for what was about to come.

"You are absolutely right," the former Borg's voice quivered. "If I'm being honest, I was too scared of what you might do," she confessed.

Surprise lined the older woman's forehead. "Scared? You? Please! I've seen you single handedly march into every battle, big or small, without so much as a flinch."

"That was before. Before I held her in my arms. The first moment I held her and looked at her, everything changed for me." Seven couldn't contain the lonely tear that slipped down her cheek. "I was terrified that you would view her as a mistake and force me to terminate, or that you would take her away from me. That you would view me as too flawed and unfit to be her mother, and honestly, I don't how I would ever survive if I lost her," she choked out, then managed to clear her throat. "I was scared to trust you, how could I, when it was so easy for you to throw me away?"

The words pierced right through Janeway, dissolving her anger. Her shoulders slumped. She knew she had hurt Seven, but she could now see that the hurt she had inflicted ran much deeper than she ever could have imagined. And it absolutely wrecked her to see firsthand how badly she treated her. She had come here ready and willing to repair what she had done, but the damage was much more extensive than she could comprehend.

"Seven," she said, her voice coarse with the sensations of hurt, anger, and guilt consuming her body. "I wish you could have trusted in me….in us."

"But there is no us. You told me to forget. That was what you wanted, what you even commanded me to do."

Captain Kathryn Janeway had commanded ships to unchartered areas of space, had gone head to head with countless species, not to mention the Borg Queen. But this….this was so messed up that not even she knew what to do or say. She was physically exhausted and emotionally drained, and for the first time in her adult life, she had no answer to that. Seven was right, she had commanded her to forget….forget them….forget that night…all of it. Something hit her and the corner of her mouth somewhat lifted.

"Well, if my memory serves, I recall you telling me that you have an eidetic memory, and that you would never forget."

It took a moment before Seven finally acknowledged what she had said. "No, I didn't forget. I couldn't. I also couldn't forget that haunted look on your face before I left your ready room, or even after, or every single time we had a conversation after that night."

"You have no idea what that was doing to me," Janeway admitted. "Or how many times I wanted to tell you that I made a…." Her voice trailed off and her eyes hardened. "You were with Chakotay," she accused, bile rising in her throat at the memory of watching them together.

Blinking Seven was thrown off by that comment. "I didn't know that you even cared," she said softly, still feeling a little confused by that.

"I did," she growled, then as if something had hit her, Janeway's face twisted in determination. "How did you know she was mine and not his?" she asked through gritted teeth.

Seven closed her eyes as if reining in her emotions, and she gathered a breath before answering. "Like I told you, I never copulated with him," she exhaled. "In fact, there was only one person it could be….the only person I had been intimate with…..the only person I gave my body to," she told her honestly.

Kathryn struggled to catch her breath hearing that, and she had to suck up the tears that were threatening to spill. "Oh Seven, if I had only known," her voice trembled as she felt the weight of it all began to recede, and all that she wanted was to start anew, right here and right now. She stepped closer and moved to take Seven's hands in her own, hoping she could convince her to feel the same. But before she could close the distance…..

"Floyd to Captain Janeway," her com badge chirped.

_Oh my god! At all times for that to go off,_ Kathryn thought, her nostrils flaring as she irritably tapped her badge. "Janeway here," she grouched.

"Ma'am." Seven heard him swallow before he could finish. "I apologize for the interruption, but we have been hailed by Starfleet Command….well, about nine times in the last hour. I've tried to stall, but they insist on talking to you."

"Understood, I will transport over. Give me five minutes."

"Aye aye, Captain."

Seven's implant rose as she gazed at the smaller woman. "Is everything all right?"

"Like I said, I've risked everything to come here," Janeway responded, drawing in a sharp breath as she rubbed at her brow. "As I was saying….I desperately wanted to tell you how I fe…"

Her com badge chirped again, making Janeway groan. She clenched her fists before tapping the badge. "What?" she fired.

"They just called again, Captain." Commander Floyd's voice broke through. "I don't believe you have five minutes."

Janeway remained poised, but Seven could see that she wanted to scream. "Fine, I'm on my way." Once again she tapped the badge, feeling her heart plummet into her gut. "I have to go," she said, but it actually took her a minute to take that first step. She began to leave the cargo bay, then swiveled back. "We are not finished here," she voiced.

"I concur, Captain."

Her heart heavy, Kathryn looked at Seven, acutely aware that she would likely not see her again for some time. "Please take care of our little girl," she told her. "And Seven, I give you my word that I would never take her away from you." She swallowed and dipped her head to the side so she could take one more look at this woman. "Commander," she finally voiced, then exited the room with a strut that only Captain Janeway could pull off.

Seven stood near the bulkhead full of melancholy and regret, but she didn't have time to dwell on it. She was due on the surface for more negotiations. By the time she returned to the Enterprise, Janeway's ship had broken orbit, and was now on the way back to Starfleet headquarters, where she would likely receive some sort of reprimand.

Back at her computer, her heart skipped a beat as she noticed the alert in her inbox. Sitting down at the desk, she took a breath before clicking it open to read what Kathryn had written to her.

_Seven,_

_Sometimes we question things in life….why are we put in certain situations and end up where we end up? The fact is, I have done that a lot in my life, more so after receiving this latest news. Do you believe in fate? I certainly never did, at least that's what I always told myself. Now, I'm not so sure. I do believe that you were sent to me, Seven. Yes, you came into my life in the craziest way possible, but even back then I was drawn to you._

_In the beginning, I twisted everything in order to make it fit into my own rules….Starfleet's rules. It made it easier for me to cope, at least that's what I tried to tell myself. But I was wrong….oh so wrong. I never realized how much I really did need you._

_Then I lied to you, not just to you but to myself as well. I was so blinded my own needs and wants, that I couldn't see how badly I hurt you. I'd give anything to go back….back before I withdrew from you. Yes, you were right, I did do that. I pulled away and pushed you away. It was the only way I could deal with my feelings for you. I convinced myself that I was doing right by you and my command._

_Yet deep down, I always knew what you were to me. It took some planet in the middle of the Delta Quadrant to bring it out in me, but the truth is it was always there. I don't want to take away anything from that night, because that was the best night of my entire life. I should have held onto it…..and you….with everything in me._

_I am ashamed that I let fear and uncertainty keep me from what I truly wanted….which is YOU. It has been you for a very long time. My biggest regret is commanding you to walk away from me. I have replayed that scenario in my head so many times, and if I could, I'd say to hell with the damned prime directive and go back and do it differently._

_I understand that there are some things in life that are inevitable. Things will happen and I am powerless and cannot control those things, but I will vow right here and now to always tell you the truth._

_And that very first truth is I will never take Selene away from you, ever. She is yours just as much as you are hers. I just hope you will let me in on that as well. I only got to see just a little glimpse of her, and I already love her so much._

_I will always be here for you and her. Please, just give me a chance Seven, that's all I ask._

_I have to go, I am being debriefed and reprimanded for basically confiscating a Starfleet vessel. As I write this, I am banned from space._

_Please be safe out there. I will be patiently waiting for your response….well, as patiently as I can. I know that I have not kept many of the promises I made to you, and I'm asking you to please let me start now._

_Remember when I once told you I wanted to take you to meet my family? Well, I still want that so much. Indiana will wait for you, as will I._

_Tell Selene I am thinking of her, and I hope she keeps smiling that adorable smile, the very one that reminds me so much of her mother. She is so beautiful Seven, she is perfect in every way. Please give her a hug for me._

_All my love,_

_Kathryn_

Seven was shaking as tears fell down her face. She had wanted this for so long, and her heart broke once again. She thought she had it all figured out, but this just told her she had nothing at all figured out. She knew deep down what she wanted. She just knew it would also take her much longer than she wanted to achieve it. After all, she was still a million light years from her..….and from Indiana.


	12. Part 12

**Part 12**

Kathryn Janeway hunched forward on the couch, elbows on her knees and her hands cupping her face as she stared off into space, until Gretchen stomped her foot to get her attention.

“Kathryn Marie Janeway!”

Blinking, Kathryn slowly lifted her head. “What?” she asked, like it was the first time she was hearing her name.

“I’ve been talking to you, and you haven’t heard a word I said. Where the heck were you?” Gretchen asked, frustration in her voice. Her tone softened as she immediately noticed her daughter’s troubled gaze. “Hey, are you okay?”

Phoebe walked in just in time to witness this. She knew her sister had been through quite the ordeal, and this was much bigger than being lost in the Delta Quadrant for seven years. No, it wasn’t that at all. Her big sister was still reeling with the news that she had mothered a child.

“Mom, maybe you should give her a break.”

Kathryn quickly shook her head. “No, I am fine. I was just….

“Daydreaming?” Phoebe quipped.

Blowing out a tired breath, Kathryn stood up. “No…just….I was just thinking,” she said. Deep down she knew her sister was accurate. She couldn’t stop thinking about the two most important people in her life…..who happened to be unattainable to her, and that in and of itself bothered her the most.

“You still haven’t heard from her I take it?” Gretchen asked softly.

Kathryn groaned quietly and shook her head. “Mom, it’s been months. Besides, don’t you think I’d tell you if I had heard from her?”

Gretchen made a face as she inched closer to her daughter. “Actually, you’ve always been rather secretive. I usually have to force things out of you,” she responded, then sighed. “In fact, how long it take you to actually tell me you have a daughter?”

“I told you as soon as I was able to.”

Gretchen rolled her eyes. “We both know better. I told you I would let that slide, but I am that girl’s grandmother, and I deserve to know her,” she huffed.

_Here we go again,_ Kathryn thought. “I know, and you’re right, but right now she’s in another galaxy. Since I’ve been put on indefinite leave, I have no way of knowing when, or even if, she will come back to Earth.”

“Hey, let’s try to stay calm. There isn’t any point in us arguing over this,” Phoebe interjected.

“Easy for you to say,” Kathryn dryly noted. At this point, she just felt numb. She had been waiting impatiently for any kind of message or word about Seven. She had even asked Tom if he had any information about when the Enterprise was due back. He was not much help, and of course did not give her any answers she liked. She was in limbo, and all she could do was sit by and wait until her forced leave of absence was finished. As soon as she was cleared, she planned to be on the next ship out of here, with or without Starfleet.

Gretchen walked to the front door and pulled her hat off of the coat rack. She tied the loose ribbon around her neck as she talked. “Well, I think maybe we should go weed the garden, and gather the tomatoes that are ripe for canning.”

Kathryn groaned and now rolled her eyes. This was her life right now, and she detested it, even if it did offer her some sort of distraction. “I’ll be right out,” she griped. She watched her mother leave, then contemplated just sitting right back down and doing nothing. That’s all she had done for several months since her reprimand from Starfleet.

“I’m sorry, Sis,” Phoebe offered. “I know this sucks.”

“Thanks.”

Phoebe laid a gentle hand on her big sister’s shoulder. “If I could, I would gladly call her up and demand she give you at least some sort of answer. This not knowing is killing you.”

“Phoebe, she’s a commander on one of the most important vessels in Starfleet, doing highly classified missions, so that would be a little hard to do. Just saying,” Kathryn defended, unable to help herself. “Not to mention she used to be Borg,” she added.

“I just hope that’s the only reason why you haven’t heard from her,” Phoebe hummed, then offered a smile and sighed. “I have a niece, a niece I’ve never even seen. It’s so crazy.”

“You think that’s crazy, try finding out you have a daughter who you didn’t even give birth to,” Kathryn commented dryly.

That made Phoebe laugh. “Yeah, you win. That’s definitely crazier. You know, I always knew you were an overachiever, but I gotta admit I’m kind of proud that my big sister is the first human woman to knock someone up,” she teased with a wink.

“You’re not funny,” Kathryn mumbled, but her lips curved into just a hint of a smile.

“Pfft, Auntie Phoebe is freaking hilarious,” she shrugged, then glanced at the clock. “I have to go to work. You, on the other hand, better get out there and help Mom, otherwise you’ll never hear the end of it.”

“Oh joy,” Kathryn grumbled, then stood up. “God, I miss being in space.”

“I bet you do. Well, I gotta go or I’m gonna be late. See ya tonight, Mama Katie,” she said with a grin and a wave as she hurried to go.

Kathryn watched her leave, then ran a hand through her hair and slowly sauntered out the front door. She was still a fortified starship captain, even if her fight was with the unruly vegetation that was trying to overtake the area. It wasn’t nearly the same as Species 8572, but she was determined not to let them get the best of her.

……………

She had spent hours working hard outside, and Kathryn stretched her weary back to alleviate some of the cramps that seemed to lodge in a certain area after bending over too long. Suddenly, a glint of light flashed in the sky, causing her to glance toward the west, where the sun was now sliding down the horizon.

She continued to watch the shuttle craft until it came into view and hovered over the farm. It was rare to see anything like this out here, and curious, her mother joined her out on the lawn.

“What in the world? Who could that be?” Gretchen wondered, looking in her daughter’s direction. “Do you know anything about this?”

“Not a clue.”

“Maybe it is one of your old crewman here to visit. Shoot, and I didn’t even clean the house today,” she fretted.

Janeway was not expecting any visitors, but she realized her mother could be right, as she recognized that this was definitely a Starfleet vessel. Her heart began to speed up with a newfound nervousness at the thought of who it could possibly be. She gingerly began to walk closer, but still remaining a safe distance away. The glare from the setting sun made it impossible to get a definitive view of the mystery guest. Even when she shaded her eyes, she still was unable to make out who it was.

The shuttle eventually powered down, and it took a little bit longer before the doors finally opened, revealing the identity of the unexpected visitor. However, Kathryn was still unable to get a good look, and felt immensely frustrated with the sun for interfering with her vision.

She waited impatiently for whoever it was to make themselves known, and felt herself getting annoyed with the hesitancy from whoever was there. “Who’s there? Is there something I can help you with?” she finally hollered out.

The person didn’t respond, and after another beat she could finally make the figure who was walking down the ramp, and as the individual continued to walk down the ramp, it became clear who it was. Kathryn would know that walk anywhere. It was her. Her heart seemed to crash into her gut at the realization of who actually had just landed, right there, just a few yards away.

“Oh god,” she gasped, and took a stumbled step back, then another one once as she noticed that Seven was not alone. It took every ounce of will power she had in her not to let out a strangled sob at the sight of Selene, right there at Seven’s side, holding her hand.

Gretchen’s gaze sharpened on the intruders, and as they walked closer, she too gasped and then quickly began to cry. “She….she….she…..” she stuttered, too overcome with emotions to even form coherent words.

Kathryn had almost forgotten her mother was there, and immediately realized she needed to get a handle on her before she made a scene.

“Mom,” she turned and took hold of her shoulders. “I need you to give me a minute. Please,” she firmly voiced.

It took Gretchen a moment for her eyes to come clear with understanding. “Yes of course. I’ll be in the house.”

“Thank you,” she exhaled, then drew in a huge breath, then another as she took a moment to steady herself before turning around to welcome them. Her palms began to sweat, and matching beads formed on her forehead as she watched them get closer.

Seven was a sight to behold, and she looked even more beautiful wearing casual clothes, but Kathryn only let her eyes linger for a moment before seeking out Selene. She looked like she had to have grown an inch since the last time she saw her. She soaked in the vision of her daughter, unable to get enough of her. She had seen her before, but this time she was seeing her as her daughter. She was overwhelmed and nervous, and felt a warmth spill over her with a love she already felt for her….a love unlike any she had ever imagined.

She swallowed in a mouth that had now gone dry and finally managed to find her voice. “Seven, Selene,” she said with a smile. “This is a pleasant surprise.” She couldn’t stop the tears in her eyes, nor did she want to.

“Good evening, Captain,” Seven greeted cordially. “I am sorry for just showing up unannounced.”

Selene smiled up toward Kathryn. “Yeah we just got here…. I mean to Earth, and Mom wanted to come here before we went anywhere else,” she told her honestly.

Seven felt her cheeks flush with embarrassment, but it really didn’t matter. She was finally here….the place she had heard so much about……the place she had always longed to visit. All she could do was softly smile and drink in the vision of the other woman.

“You are always welcome here,” Kathryn breathed, with a tiny smile of her own. “Always,” she emphasized.

They just stood there for another minute as Kathryn soaked in the sight of them both, and she wanted to pinch herself to make sure this was really happening and not just another daydream. Suddenly, she noticed that Seven had tilted her head and narrowed in directly on her face.

“What?” Janeway asked, confusion hanging on her brow.

“You have something on your cheek,” the blonde casually, pointing towards the spot.

Kathryn quickly ran a few fingers over the area Seven had indicated. “Did I get it?”

Seven grinned and shook her head, and before Kathryn could try again, the former Borg reached over and gently ran her thumb over the area. “There,” she softly husked, gazing into the smaller woman’s eyes. Her thumb tingled from the contact, and she let it linger for a moment.

It was just the pad of her thumb, but as soon as Kathryn felt the softness of Seven’s skin brushing against her own, her entire body reacted, as her pulse skyrocketed and a tinge of electricity shot right through her. She was immediately taken back to being wrapped up in this woman on that planet. _My god, has it really been that long since she has touched me? _Her body had been deprived of Seven’s touch for years, and apparently just the slightest of touches was all it took to make her crave more. All of a sudden she found it difficult to see, and she dizzily blinked, momentarily forgetting to breathe.

Seven dipped her head with a tinge of concern. “Captain, are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she blinked again, forcing herself to take in enough oxygen to get the blood pumping back to her brain. “Of course. Did you get it?”

“Yes, it is gone,” Seven told her directly, finally removing her hand from the other woman’s face.

They both immediately missed the contact, and just stood there for a moment, the air electric between them.

“I got to pee,” Selene squealed, quietly tugging on her mother’s hand as she continued to squirm.

Kathryn couldn’t help but giggle. “Well, let’s get you inside, shall we? Then, there is someone I would love you both to meet,” she told them, quite aware that her mother was anxiously waiting to meet her granddaughter.

“Thank you, Captain,” Seven said.

“Yes, thank you Captain Kathryn,” Selene mimicked, then scrunched up her face. “I really have to go,” she whined.

“Follow me,” Kathryn instructed, then proceeded to lead them to the house as Selene half walked, half wiggled. Once they were inside, she showed Selene the bathroom, then walked back to the living room, where Seven was looking at a few of the items her mother kept out on a shelf.

“Uh, she said she didn’t need any help,” she commented hesitantly, motioning towards the restroom.

“She is correct. She has been independently taking care of that for quite some time.”

Kathryn blew out an awkward breath. “I didn’t…I wasn’t sure if I should have….” she trailed off and threw her hands up as if she were surrendering. “I’m sorry, this is just all so new to me.”

“It’s alright, and I believe you will have it all figured out in no time, Captain,” Seven told her sincerely.

“Yeah about that. Don’t you think it’s time to stop calling me that?”

“You are still Captain, are you not?”

Kathryn sighed heavily. “Yes, but right now, that’s just too formal, Seven,” she explained, making sure to use the other woman’s name instead of her rank. “Please, just call me Kathryn.”

Seven paused and began to immerse herself in looking the other woman over. Her gaze was intense, as if she was inspecting her, and Kathryn felt it slice right through her. She swallowed as soon as she noticed the slight smirk on that perfect mouth.

“You do recall what happened the last time you instructed me to call you that,” she said with a satisfied grin. “Kathryn,” she husked, and Janeway felt her whole body react to the sound of her name coming out of those lips.

Dumbstruck, it took a moment for Kathryn to gather herself. “Oh, how I have missed that Borg bluntness.”

“Have you?” Seven moved in closer.

_Be honest_. “Yes, very much,” she breathed, her voice thick.

“All done,” Selene’s voice broke in.

Both parents turned to greet her. “All washed?” Seven asked firmly, eyebrow rising slightly.

“Yup.” Selene bounced in showing her hands. “All clean.” She then turned toward the older woman. “You have a cool place, Captain Kathryn.”

Kathryn groaned a little and kneeled before her daughter. “You know, you can just call me Kathryn while you are here,” she said, gently bumping her finger off of Selene’s tiny nose. Right away she could see what Seven had told her on the Enterprise. She could see the Janeway in her little girl, and it caused a feeling of pure joy and happiness to bubble out of her. 

Selene scrunched her face. “Are you okay?” she asked, her voice confused yet caring.

The way this little girl….her little girl….was looking at her tore at Kathryn’s heart, and she had to clear her throat to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. Seven quickly noticed this and came to kneel beside Kathryn. “She is just so happy to see you,” she said.

Selene smiled widely. “Well I am happy to be here and see you too.” She then leapt forward and threw her arms around Kathryn’s neck and hugged her tight.

The tears she had been trying to ward off now trickled down her cheeks as she soaked in the feeling of her daughter hugging her for the very first time. Kathryn just let them fall as she continued to hold onto Selene until she felt her pull back, but it was only for an instant as she was now pulling Seven in with her small arm.

“We can’t leave Mommy out.”

Seven softly chuckled through her own tears and just pulled both Selene and Kathryn into her arms, holding them tightly to her. “We love hugs,” Seven whispered. “Don’t we?”  
  


Selene nodded within the embrace. “Yes, we do.”

Kathryn closed her eyes, relishing the moment. She loved this….them….so much that she never wanted to let them go. She soaked it all in, knowing this was a moment she would never ever forget. She was overcome with complete and utter joy, and she wanted this moment to never end.

“Awww,” she faintly heard, followed by familiar sobs. She then felt both Selene and Seven pull away and look up. She, however, did not need to look up to know that her mother had walked in.

Selene took in the sight of the emotional older woman and looked back to the two women. “Um….is she okay?” she asked, her voice unsure.

The look on her little girl’s face and the cute little voice made Kathryn giggle. “She’s fine; she’s just happy to see you,” she explained.

Selene made a face as Kathryn and Seven stood back up. “Why is everyone so happy to see me? And why do grown ups cry when they’re happy? When I’m happy, I laugh,” she pointed out.

That made all the adults laugh.

“Well, it’s because…..” Seven began, but Kathryn cut her off.

“She’s happy to see you because I’ve told her so much about you. She’s been dying to meet you,” she answered, then looked over at Seven, who dipped her head and gave a reassuring smile of agreement.

“So without further ado, I would like for you both to meet my mother, Gretchen Janeway. And mother, this is… well that’s…..”

Now Gretchen cut her off and went right to the former Borg, sweeping her arms around her and hugging her. “Seven, it is so good to meet you,” she sniffed, wiping at her wet cheeks, but holding her happy smile. She promptly squatted down and held her hand out for Selene to take. “And Selene, you are even more beautiful than I could have imagined, I am so honored to meet you.”

Selene giggled. “Nice to meet you too,” she responded politely, and shook the older Janeway’s hand. She then furrowed her brow and turned to her mother. “Everyone here is so nice, but I still don’t understand why they’re so emotional. Is this an Earth thing or an Indiana thing?” she asked, with a curious expression on her face.

Seven twisted her lips in a grin. “No, Sweetie, they’re just so happy to finally meet you.” Her tone then became serious. “I really should have brought you here a lot sooner. That’s on me, and for that, I am so sorry,” she said to her daughter, but then turned her gaze to Kathryn and Gretchen, her eyes filled with remorse.

Hearing those words made Kathryn want to cry even more, but she managed to hold off, not wanting to reinforce to Selene that Indiana was full of women who cry all the damn time. She stood and joined the rest of them. Silence fell upon them, so much so that they could hear the ticking of the old grandfather clock that had been in the Janeway family for generations.

Gretchen was unfazed by the silence, and just observed Seven and Kathryn. The air suddenly felt thick with the chemistry that sizzled between them, and she couldn’t help but smile before clearing her throat. “I sure hope you two are staying for dinner,” she invited.

Seven blinked. “I ….”

“I’d love to have you both stay,” Gretchen amended, then lightly glared at her daughter. “Besides, I am pretty sure Phoebe will also want to meet the two of you.”

Catching on, Kathryn finally chimed in. “Yes, please stay for dinner. There’s nothing Mom loves more than cooking a big meal.”

“Yes, of course, we accept.”

Selene smiled broadly. “Good, because lately all we have been having is replicated meals.”

Kathryn was confused at hearing that, since she had heard that Seven had turned into quite an excellent cook. “Oh?”

“We’ve been really busy, the entire ship has actually,” Seven told her.

Bewildered, Kathryn inhaled. “I hope everything was all right.”

“Yes, I just had somewhere else I’d rather be, so I made it my personal goal to achieve that, even if I had to put in a few extra hours,” she said truthfully.

Realizing what that actually meant, Kathryn’s chest tightened, and she smiled at the former Borg. They continued to look at each other once again until Gretchen finally coughed to clear the haze that seemed to settle around these two women. “Why don’t you show them around the farm? Take ‘em down to the pond maybe?”

Breaking out of her stupor, Kathryn nodded_. Get it together. _“Does that sound okay to you guys?” she asked.

“Yes,” Selene voiced, and they started out of the door and down the front steps. “Hey, do you have horses?”

Kathryn sighed. “Sorry honey, we don’t. “

“What kind of farm doesn’t have horses?” Selene pouted.

Kathryn slightly grinned. “Well, the corn kind.”

“Oh.” Selene frowned. “I get to see corn, and Geshere gets to see a Saber Bear.”

Kathryn eyed Seven, giving her an odd look. It made Seven snort and that surprised Janeway, making her blink and then laugh, which then made Seven laugh and now since they were laughing, Selene laughed too, even though she had no idea why they were laughing.

Finally after Seven composed herself, she cleared her throat. “How about maybe sometime soon the three of us could go to the zoo?” she stated, but her eyes questioned Kathryn.

Selene squealed. “Please, please. I’ll be good, I promise.”

Kathryn wouldn’t say no to this, even if Starfleet gave her a new command. “I think that is a wonderful idea,” she exhaled. “But in the meantime, how about I show you a few frogs and maybe some ducks,” she offered, winking to Selene.

“Really?” Selene asked, eyes wide.

“Of course.”

The little girl quickly threw her hand into Kathryn’s and it made her heart buzz with a happiness she never knew was possible. They began to walk down the path around a few trees and onto the pond, and the entire time Kathryn wondered if it would be okay if she just reached out and took hold of Seven’s hand as well, but she pondered on it too long because now they were there, and once Selene saw the water, she was off like lightening.

“Hey be careful,” Seven hollered out, watching her daughter’s every move.

Kathryn watched her too for a moment, then slipped her gaze toward the other woman. The sun was starting to dip lower in the sky behind her, and she was quite the vision. Her breath caught, and she was so lost in the sight of this woman that once again she was reminded of their time on that planet, and the way Seven looked as multiples suns were drifting lower on the horizon. It all came back, falling around her, and she found herself lost in this woman. _She was too beautiful to be real,_ she thought. But she was real, and they weren’t on that planet anymore. No, Seven was right here, at her family farm, standing right beside her. And this time, Kathryn was determined that nothing was going to get in the way.


	13. Part 13

**Part 13**

“So, Selene did you have fun with the ducks?”

“Oh, most definitely,” Selene quipped happily.

Janeway grinned with a surprised lift to her brow. “Most definitely, huh,” she commented, thinking this child was way too smart for her age. She raised her eyes to meet Seven’s, and the twinkle in them told her that the blonde knew exactly what she was thinking.

“She so intelligent, Seven.”

“I’ve been told that on more than one occasion,” Seven said quietly.

“Are you guys talking about me?” Selene questioned.

Janeway’s smile bloomed, and she couldn’t help but reach down to lightly tickle the little girl. “Maybe,” she growled playfully.

Selene giggled and ran a few feet ahead, then abruptly stopped. “Whoa!” she blurted, then pointed a finger ahead of her. “Is that a swing?” Her eyes widened with excitement.

“Oh,” Kathryn blinked. “Yes, it is.” She had totally forgotten about the tree swing. “Would you like to try it out?”

Selene happily nodded her head, then began to eagerly skip towards it, as the two grown ups followed her towards the large tree. “She skips, too,” she said more to herself, then turned toward Seven. “I probably could barely walk when I was her age, let alone skip.”

Seven smiled proudly. “She is well advanced in most areas of development,” she informed her, then playfully nudged the older woman. “And I have no doubt you were as well. Truthfully, I’ve always thought she inherited that from you.”

Shocked, Kathryn’s cheeks flushed and she quickly shook her head. “Oh no, that’s all you. I mean, look how far you’ve come, and in such a short time, too. Seriously, you moved up the ranks faster than anyone in the history of Starfleet.”

Seven hesitated, then eyed the smaller woman tenderly. “I suppose I had something to prove.”

“Did you now?” Kathryn’s lips thinned. “Why is that? To be honest, I thought Starfleet would be the last place you’d want to be.”

Seven pivoted to look at her former Captain, halting her steps. Kathryn stopped as well and looked up at her.

“I did have a few offers elsewhere, but deep down, this was the most desirable option for me,” she swallowed. “Honestly, I wanted to be someone you would be proud of, approve of.” Her voice wavered, and Kathryn immediately picked up on it.

“Oh, Seven,” she exhaled. “You’ve always exceeded my expectations.”

Seven eyed her with an unreadable expression, then inhaled and nodded. “I suppose,” she commented dryly. She continued to walk down the path towards Selene.

Kathryn’s brow furrowed at the shift in the blonde’s demeanor. Clearly, she had said something wrong, but had no idea what that might be. She replayed her words to herself, then realization fell upon her. _She thought I saw her as not good enough for ME. God, I’m such an idiot. _ She trotted up beside the other woman and was just about to voice it, but Seven was already pulling Selene into her arms and sitting her on the swing.

“I want to go really high.”

Seven pulled her back as far as she could, then began to push gently on her back. Kathryn found herself unable to contain her laughter as Selene’s happy squeal rang out around them.

She continued to swing on her own as her parents watched in blissful silence. Kathryn was content to watch her daughter playing on the exact same swing that she played on as a child, and once again was filled with an overwhelming feeling of pure happiness. Just then, she caught sight of something growing on the hillside, and her eyes twinkled with excitement. “I’ll be right back,” she voiced.

Seven nodded in acknowledgment, then turned her gaze back to Selene. After a minute, Kathryn was back, standing right in front of her and holding out the ugliest flower Seven had ever seen.

“Are you attempting to be romantic?” she inquired, with a bewildered lift to her brow.

Kathryn burst out laughing at that. It wasn’t her intention, and it never occurred to her that it might look like that. “Um, actually,” she began, then cleared her throat. “This is a dandelion puff, and it’s magical,” she told her with a straight face.

Seven turned her head slightly and eyed her curiously. “Is it really?” she asked skeptically.

“It is.” Kathryn had to fold in her lips to keep her mischievous smile at bay.

The former Borg narrowed in on the flower and then Kathryn. “I’ve never heard of this; explain.”

_I gotcha now. _Kathryn couldn’t contain her smirk. “Well,” she began, then proceeded to tear off a small piece of the stem of the flower. “I am going to give you this tiny piece, and I want you to hide it anywhere on you. Don’t tell me where you put it. I’ll turn around so I don’t see.” She handed it over for Seven to take and then turned away, her back to the blonde. “Did you hide it?”

Seven examined the small green stem between her fingers for a moment. To her knowledge, Kathryn was not a sorcerer, and in all of the species she had assimilated during her time with the Borg, there was no scientific evidence that magic existed in Indiana, or on Earth for that matter. She mentally calculated the risks, and decided there could be no harm in humoring this woman, who in spite of her attempts to seem casual, was pretty excited to engage in this juvenile act. An impish grin spread through her lips as she hid it in a place she was certain Janeway would not dare to look. “Okay, I have complied.”

Kathryn turned around, relying on her command training to keep her face even. “So, this is sort of like a magnet, and I’m going to search for it.”

“A magnet, huh,” Seven commented, certain that if that were true, then her Borg implants would definitely be affected. She internally reprimanded herself for being so logical, knowing full well that Kathryn was playing some sort of game. Truth be told, she wanted to play along, curious to where this was going. Besides, part of her kind of hoped that Kathryn would indeed search out the spot on the body she had hidden the small stem.

“Yes, in a way,” Kathryn now husked, inching closer to the blonde, only stopping when was close enough to breathe her in. She swallowed as she felt her body react to being in such close proximity to Seven, and blinked, silently commanding herself to focus. She began to wave the flower up and down, all over Seven’s body, and although Seven’s breath hitched, she stood perfectly still in her customary Borg pose, with hands behind her back. She managed not to falter, even as her senses were assaulted with the unique way that this woman always smelled.

After a moment, Kathryn grinned and stepped back. “I have located it,” she voiced confidently.

“Oh?” Seven questioned, for a moment forgetting what the other woman was doing.

“You hid it in your mouth.”

Seven blinked. “Huh? No, that is incorrect.”

“Yes, it’s under your tongue,” Kathryn said firmly.

“No, it is not,” Seven fired back.

Kathryn took a step closer, her eyes flashing with determination. “Prove it. Show me,” she commanded.

Seven wanted to roll her eyes, but decided to just go with it. Opening her mouth, she went to lift her tongue when all of a sudden the older woman forcefully shoved the flower puff into her mouth.

Caught off guard, Seven started to choke, and attempted to spit it out as fast as she could. As she did, she could hear Kathryn snort with a laugh she knew she had had never heard come from her. Right then and there, she knew she had been had.

As soon as she expelled every particle out of her mouth, she stood back up, rolled her shoulders, and pivoted towards the Captain. Kinking her neck to the side, she then leveled a glare at her that was so Borg like, it caused Janeway to instinctively take a step back.

The look Seven was shooting her was actually a little frightening, more frightening than when she had gone toe to toe with the Borg Queen, and she briefly wondered if she was going to be assimilated…..or worse. She held her hands up in surrender. “Now hold on a second, Seven, it was just a joke,” she tried.

Seven saw the other woman retreating, and marched toward her. “Resistance is futile.”

“Seven….wait……” Kathryn breathed, her hands cautiously out in front of her. “Seriously, what are you doing?” she asked, as she continued to backpedal. “It was just a stupid joke, I swear.” Her eyes widened as the former Borg continued coming at her. “Seven, stand down,” she ordered, her voice faltering in spite of her attempts to sound authoritative.

“Your command to stand down is duly noted, and I respectfully decline to comply. Like I said, Kathryn, resistance is futile.”

_Oh shit….shit….shit….shit! _ “Seven,” Kathryn tried again, then her survival instincts kicked in and she turned to run. She managed to escape the former drone for only a moment, then she was outmaneuvered by superior Borg physicality and quickness as Seven tackled her to the ground.

She landed with a light thud, but felt her body cushioned by strong arms. Just as she was about to try to wither out from her grasp, she found her own arms suddenly pinned over her head with a strength she knew she could not overpower.

“It would appear that I have captured you, Captain,” Seven mocked, as she gazed down at the woman she had successfully subdued.

Kathryn was unaccustomed to being so easily manhandled, and she instinctively began to fight back, but ceased when she looked up and saw the playfulness in those piercing blue eyes above her. There was just a hint of something more, and although she couldn’t quite articulate what that look meant, she knew without a shadow of doubt that she had no reason to be free.

“It seems you have caught me, so tell me, what will you ever do with me?” she teased, her own eyes daring the blonde to make a move.

Seven had intended to pounce and tickle Kathryn until she begged her to stop, but now that she was on top of her like this, that was the last thing on her mind. She was keenly aware of the feel of the body beneath her own, and every enhanced sensory node in her body felt the charge from her spiked desire for this woman. She wanted nothing more than to kiss her, and just the thought of doing so made her breasts go hot.

She had been with a few others since their encounter, but she couldn’t believe no matter how hard she tried to control it, her body had other ideas when she was in her presence. It was a heavenly feeling to once again have her body awakened by the sensual activation she had only felt when she was with Kathryn. Every single part of her craved her, and her body trembled as it melted even further onto the one beneath her. Her eyes momentarily slipped shut as she envisioned them in the throes of passion.

Being this close to Seven had consumed Kathryn with her own arousal. Desire burned hot throughout her body, and she shivered as she felt Seven’s warm body settling into her own. She had felt this before, on the planet, and in her fantasies since then, but never in her wildest dreams did she think she would ever experience this complete and utter ecstasy again. She felt Seven’s body slide impossibly closer, and it took every ounce of self-control to hold off the groan that threatened to escape her lips.

Kathryn sharply inhaled as she felt Seven’s thigh slip between her legs and press up again a certain area that was now on fire. She gazed up at the blonde, and instantly noticed how her blue eyes had darkened considerably. She watched, entranced, as Seven’s tongue slipped out to moisten her lips, and her heart sped up in anticipation as Seven’s head dipped lower. After years of deprivation, she was now just seconds away from what she had desperately yearned for. Eager to feel Seven’s lips against her own, she licked her own and arched her neck up to meet Seven’s.

“Mom!” Selene hollered out, shattering the haze of arousal between them. “I’m stuck! I can’t get down!”

Feeling Seven jerk away from her, Kathryn groaned, and then was hoisted up to her feet.

“I see that,” Seven answered the little girl. “Be right there.” She now cast a glance toward the older woman.

“Next time,” she winked playfully, then went to gather Selene off the swing.

Kathryn swallowed, then smiled and shook her head. “Can’t wait,” she said to herself.

………….

When they all sat down together around the large oak table, Selene’s eyes grew wide at the food spread out before them. “Whoa, now this is a feast,” she voiced, hungry and ready to dive in.

Janeway laughed, along with Gretchen and her sister Phoebe. Phoebe had cried joyous tears when Kathryn introduced her to Selene, who gave her an odd expression like really….again?

“I’ve never seen corn like this,” Selene commented airily, picking up the small piece of corn on the cob.

All three Janeways gave her a puzzled look, then looked questioningly at Seven.

“Um,” the former Borg breathed. “Never had the opportunity to, I suppose. It was always consumed without the cob on the ship.”

“I guess we will let you off this hook….this time,” Kathryn winked, then narrowed in on her daughter. “Did you know that the cob is called a flower? And the kernels are actually the seeds?”

“I knew that the kernels were seeds,” Selene said assuredly, rolling her eyes.

Seven witnessed this and gave her a daughter a stern look. “Selene, what did I tell you about that?”

“Not to do it,” Selene sighed, and then apologized to Kathryn. “I’m sorry,” she pouted.

Seeing that cute little frown tore at Kathryn’s heart. “It is okay. It’s my fault, really. I should have known that a smart little girl like you already knew that.”

“It’s okay, not your fault you didn’t know. It’s not like we have known each other since I was born,” she pointed out nonchalantly and began to ingest her food, oblivious to how her words affected the adults in the room.

Kathryn felt her chest burn with a deep ache at all she had missed out on. She had missed so much….Selene’s birth, swaddling her in her arms, soothing her when she cried…..not to mention all of the firsts she had not been there to witness. There was no way to go back and experience all of that, and she felt the loss overwhelm and cripple her. She tried to control her emotions and keep her face even, but when she felt Seven’s hand slip over her own, she knew she had not held it together very well. She exhaled and casually jerked her hand away.

“Kathryn,” Seven breathed, her voice sincere and filled with regret. “Please know that I am truly sorry about that.”

Phoebe couldn’t help but pipe in. “Sorrys can’t bring those moments back,” she fired, unable to keep her mouth shut.

Seven gathered a breath. “You are correct, however, you also do not know the circumstances surrounding it,” she said evenly.

Ignoring them both, Kathryn watched Selene as she continued to devour her meal, getting food all over her cheeks, and unaware of the tension at the table.

“You should have told her,” Phoebe quipped in a low voice.

Kathryn abruptly put a hand up in a warning to her sister. “Stay out of this,” she hissed. “All that matters is this….right here.” She leveled a glare at Phoebe, one that the younger Janeway knew meant back the hell off.

Selene licked her lips and now began to tear into her chicken. “Mmmm, this is so much better than Violet’s,” she grinned up at Gretchen.

“I’m so happy to hear that,” Gretchen said lightly, her lips curving into a boastful smile.

Seven froze and internally cringed at hearing that name slip from her daughter’s mouth. She had totally forgotten about the few dinners they had shared with Chakotay’s family.

_Who the hell is Violet? _Kathryn thought, the name searing through her like a knife to her heart. Was she some girlfriend that Seven had failed to mention to her? While she was missing out on Selene’s early years, some shameless hussy was cooking chicken for her daughter? Her nostrils flared as she turned laser eyes toward the blonde. “Violet?” she questioned. She tried to keep her tone light, but Seven knew better.

Inhaling a large breath, Seven hesitated, but before she could respond, Selene chimed in.

“Violet is Uncle Chakotay’s aunt. I love her, she is so funny,” Selene voiced, then took a drink of water. “She’s a good cook, but Gretchen’s chicken is way better.”

Kathryn felt the anger bubbling up to the surface, on the precipice of erupting. Her lower lip was shaking, and she sucked it in, trying to hide it. She tucked her hands under the table and clenched her fists. “Uncle Chakotay, huh? And all I am is Captain Kathryn,” she growled, tossing her napkin on the table. She knew she needed to keep it together, but she couldn’t control the emotions swirling inside her. She pushed up from her chair, keeping her eyes on Selene.

“Hey, Selene, I’m sorry, but I need to get some fresh air. Please, continue to enjoy your meal,” she managed to get out, then rushed to the front porch.

Tears glistened in Seven’s eyes, and she glanced at her daughter, thankful that she was too engrossed in her food and not paying attention to the adults. She inhaled, and looked to Kathryn’s mother and sister. “I honestly thought,” she began, but Gretchen shook her head and halted her.

“We aren’t the ones you need to explain this to,” she informed firmly. She then gave the blonde a tender smile. “I’m glad you are here now, and I sure hope this isn’t a one time thing,” she said pointedly.

“We need to figure out the details, but I have no intentions of altering this,” she told her truthfully. She exhaled slowly, then stood from the table and looked to the little girl. “Selene, I’m going to join Kathryn outside. Do you mind finishing your dinner with Gretchen and Phoebe?”

“Of course, Mommy.”

She dipped her head to Gretchen, then made her way to find Kathryn and apologize once again for keeping her daughter from her.

……

Janeway’s breath caught as soon as she heard the screen door fall shut. She didn’t have to turn around to know who had followed her out here. She had always been keenly aware of when the former Borg was within close proximity. It had been like that since she had stepped off her alcove on that Borg cube all those years ago. She wasn’t about to acknowledge her, as she was still reeling from the fact that Seven and Selene were close with Chakotay’s family.

Neither woman spoke, as Seven just stood there waiting. The silence dredged on until Kathryn couldn’t take it any longer and finally turned to where the blonde was standing. Seven was perched against one of the porch’s posts, leaning against it with one foot crossed in front of the other, her hands tucked in the front pockets of her jeans. She was beautiful…absolutely stunning….and the way the moon stood just behind her made her look almost angelic, she could almost be a model or a movie star. She looked so unlike a former drone, and Janeway was rendered speechless as she continued to drink her in.

She was losing herself in Seven, and that pissed her off even more as she finally snapped out of it. “Seven,” she finally hissed, crossing her arms over her chest. “I don’t even know where to begin. Uncle Chakotay? Just when I think I’ve heard it all….how long has he been in her life? Was he there for her birth as well?”

_At least it wasn’t Papa Chakotay. _“No, he was not,” Seven answered, and now stood straighter, then took a step toward her. She had wanted to come to her as soon as she walked out the door, but she had dealt with this woman and her moods on Voyager long enough to know she needed to give her space and let her come to her. “He didn’t meet Selene until about a year after she was born, and that was because he came to meet me. I didn’t see him here until she was two, and that was very brief. Then he babysat for her so I could attend the Starfleet party, the one where we…”

“I know which party,” Kathryn interrupted with a slight hiss. “I was there, and you should have told me about Selene then,” she growled, running a hand over her face in an attempt to rein in her anger.

Seven sighed again, feeing weary. “Like I told you before, I am truly sorry I kept her from you. You are right, I should have told you right away, the moment I found out I was carrying your child.” Her voice cracked, so unlike the usually poised woman, and it made Kathryn blink in surprise. “I had decided to tell you when I was on Vulcan when I was 34 weeks along, but since I was a high risk pregnancy, I was prohibited from traveling,” she informed, her voice somewhat raspy.

“You were high risk?” Kathryn was stunned at hearing that.

“Yes,” Seven answered simply. “Let me ask you, Kathryn, what would you have done if I had just shown up that pregnant and told you that I was carrying your child?”

“I…” Kathryn began, but stopped when Seven shifted closer, a soft, sad look in her eyes.

“Don’t even tell me that you would have welcomed it with open arms. I’m quite certain you would have found it absurd and laughed.”

“I would not!” Kathryn fired back, her eyes dark with resentment. “Shock, maybe, but not laughter. Never laughter. I didn’t laugh when you told me on Enterprise,” she pointed out.

“No, but you didn’t believe me, told me it was absurd. Then you accused me of lying, suggested that it was Chakotay’s, or someone else’s,” she reminded her. “You even implied that I had somehow stolen your genetic material,” she said, hurt evident in her tone. “I was wrong for not telling you, but don’t you dare tell me you would have reacted any differently than you did on Enterprise.”

Kathryn felt defensive and wanted to argue, but deep down she knew Seven was right.

Seven dipped her head and looked the older woman in the eyes. “I was very pregnant, very hormonal, and so afraid you would reject me and tell me that she was a mistake,” she admitted.

“I know you had every reason to doubt me, and that’s all on me,” Kathryn softly voiced. “I know how badly I hurt you, and I have regretted it ever since. If I could have, I would have gone back and told my younger self to stop being a stubborn imbecile and do everything in my power to hold on to the most important thing in my life.”

Seven’s brow fell with curiosity. “She didn’t try to do that?” she asked, as it registered that the most important thing Kathryn referred to was perhaps her.

Stunned, Kathryn jerked back, knowing who Seven was talking about. “No,” she quickly voiced. “Did she know?”

“I don’t know. I have often wondered about that.”

“Did you ask?”

“I did, actually,” Seven told her. “She told me that she remembered Voyager going around that sector of space, which would mean that we were never on that planet. I didn’t get the sense that she was being deceitful, but I couldn’t help but wonder over the years if she was being truthful.”

Kathryn now harshly ran both her hands over her face. “Stupid time travel; it will always be a paradox.”

Seven just stood there for a moment, watching the older woman take in a few breaths to calm herself. Finally, she inched a little closer. “We have both made mistakes, Kathryn. The question is….” she trailed off and waited for her to pivot so she could see the grayness in her eyes.

“Is what?”

“Is this what you truly want?” Seven rasped, clearing her throat to keep her emotions in check. “I mean Selene,” she went with instead, even though she wanted to put herself in the equation. “Because if so, somehow you need to find a way to forgive me.”

Kathryn knew that she was right and she had to find a way to move past this, but she was still hurt, and knew exactly why. “It hurts knowing he is Uncle Chakotay. I don’t want to be just Captain Kathryn to her,” she told her roughly.

Seven’s eyes slipped shut only momentarily. “I don’t want that, I never did. From moment I showed up here, I wanted her to know you as her mother. I just needed YOU to be okay with it.”

Kathryn was not prepared to hear that, and she flinched back, then automatically shifted her gaze toward the window so she could Selene in the distance. “But the way….” she began, but Seven didn’t let her finish.

“Let’s go inside and tell her right now,” she decided, and began to move toward the door when Kathryn reached out and snatched her arm, halting her movement.

“Wait,” Janeway snapped. Seven eyed her with confusion and waited as the older woman inhaled a few breaths. “I just need a minute to digest this,” she swallowed.

Seven dipped her head. “I guess you’re still not sure that this is what you want.” Her tone scratched with sadness and she shuffled well away from Kathryn.

Kathryn shot her head up swiftly. “It is, please don’t doubt that.”

“Then what is it?”

“I’m…” her voice now shook and evidence of tears threatened to spill in her eyes. “What if I am not what she wants?”

That took Seven completely by surprise, and she blinked, taking a moment to let it register. “Please, give her more credit than that,” she said softly, as she now erased the steps she had taken back until she was standing right in front of her. She even dared to reach out and gather Kathryn’s hand, which automatically made the redhead’s breath hitch as she looked up at the blonde.

“Please believe me when I say this…. If you decide that this isn’t for you….that you don’t want this…..you won’t just be breaking my heart,” she told her honestly.

Kathryn’s lip slightly shook. “Oh Seven,” she all but cried. “I didn’t know I held that.”

“You’ve always held that,” Seven said, pulling their joined hands up and placing them above her heart.

Kathryn tried to swallow the lump that seemed lodged in her throat, and as she tried, tears sprung to her eyes. “I didn’t know,” she barely got out.

Seven dipped her head, her eyes serious. “I wanted to tell you for so long, but it seemed so futile.” She gathered a nervous breath. “Even when I thought I had built up hope, you dismantled it just as quickly.”

“I guess I was stupid Seven, so stupid,” she choked. “I said things that hurt you all for the sake of my command, and in the process it hurt me just as much. Hell, maybe even more.” She squeezed the blonde’s hand as she drew in even closer looking up at the younger woman. “Please Seven, forgive me and my foolishness,” she said throatily.

Seven absorbed this, feeling conflicted. She could feel her bottom lip shake and was unable to control it. “Somewhere in all of this I realized I had, even before you wrote that letter. I just didn’t realize it. It was a beautiful letter, by the way,” she breathed softly.

Kathryn held back her tears, even when she saw Seven’s eyes shine with her own that she was also holding back. “I am sorry, Kathryn, so very sorry. I promise I wanted to tell you sooner about…”

Kathryn shook her head, not wanting to ever hear another apology. She reacted by pressing a finger to the younger woman’s lips to quiet her, but the sensation of Seven’s lips against her skin made her tremble with that passionate spark that seemed to always simmer between them. She inwardly groaned and slowly began to withdraw her hand, but Seven held her wrist, stilling the movement, as her other hand snuck around Janeway’s waist, pulling them almost flush together. “So, you know how I feel, however I’m a little unclear how you feel….well…about me,” she voiced, somewhat choked up.

Kathryn couldn’t contain her smirk. “I think my actions have made it quite clear how I feel about you. I even got reprimanded for it,” she husked with a tiny smile.

Seven slightly growled at hearing this. She had waited so long to hear from this woman’s mouth that she meant something to her, and was really doubting that she ever would. She began to pull away when she felt the smaller woman tug her back.

“Not so fast,” Kathryn said, rather firmly in her command tone. She had opened her mouth, ready to tell her everything, but instead she found herself sliding her arms around her neck. She gently pulled the taller woman down and lightly pressed her lips over Seven’s in a soft kiss.

It was just a flash of a kiss, and Kathryn pulled away, trying to gauge Seven’s reaction. She was hopeful and anxious, wondering if the blonde had understood what she was trying to say. The pounding of her heart echoed so loud that she was certain Neelix could hear it all the way in the Delta Quadrant.

It felt like forever, but finally her question was answered as Seven now captured her lips in an intense kiss unlike any she had felt before. The kiss left her dizzy as it exploded through her, and neither of them could contain the heat that now enveloped them.

Seven basked in the sensations triggered by this kiss, and part of her wondered if this was even real, but there was no way she was about to pull away to find out. Instead she just allowed herself to melt into Kathryn’s arms and her kiss, which blended into another, then many more.

Kathryn arched into Seven, kissing her passionately as she lost herself to this woman who she had thought she would only have in her dreams. “Seven,” she breathed after a beat. Her lips felt swollen and her entire body was on fire, and she felt lightheaded as she gazed up at her. “I do, you know. I….”

The screen door snapped open, causing both women to growl at the interruption, which made them both softly laugh at hearing it. Phoebe cleared her throat.

“Sorry for the intrusion, but Selene basically fell asleep at the dinner table,” she smirked. “Oh, and Mom wanted me to tell you…well, both of you….that since she put Selene to bed, that means you,” she now held Seven’s gaze, “are staying the night.” She grinned one last time and then closed the door shut.

Kathryn and Seven stood there, not moving as they continued to gather their breaths. “I um…. I guess you’re staying,” Kathryn mumbled, then blinked and turned back toward the blonde. “I mean….will you stay?”

Seven took Kathryn’s hands in her own. “I don’t believe I was given a choice,” she teased, then lightly kissed her again just because she felt as if she finally could. “I just need to inform Starfleet that I will not be returning their vessel tonight.”

Kathryn licked her lips, savoring the kiss, and managed a nod. “Okay, I’ll be inside.”

Seven held on a little longer, but finally dropped Kathryn’s hands and turned toward the shuttle, only to have the older woman snatch one of her hands back.

“Don’t be too long; I’ve already missed so much.”

“I’ll be right back. In the meantime, why don’t you go tuck Selene in?”

Kathryn swallowed to ward off the unexpected tears. “I think I can do that,” she choked.

Seven softly smiled. “You’re a Starfleet captain; you’ll do just fine.”

Kathryn cleared her throat and ran a hand down her shirt as she watched Seven walk toward the shuttle, then inhaled a nervous breath as she began to walk back inside. “You got this,” she said to herself, then it really dawned on her that this would be the first time she would get to tuck her daughter into bed, and she hadn’t a clue how to do that. “Oh god.”

A thought occurred to her and she turned back to the other woman. “Hey,” she called out, and waited for Seven to turn back around. “By the way, where did you hide that flower?”

Seven’s lips split into a haughty grin. “Wouldn’t you like to know?” she winked.

_Oh, absolutely I would,_ Kathryn thought to herself, as she walked inside the house, anxious to tuck her little girl into bed.


	14. Part 14

**Part 14**

Kathryn closed the screen door, her thoughts on Selene……well, mostly. She couldn’t and wouldn’t forget about that steamy kiss she and Seven shared just a moment ago. She felt warm all over as her body vibrated from the lingering sensation of Seven’s lips on hers. Blinking, she finally gazed up to see her sister standing there and giving her a knowing smirk.

“What?”

Phoebe chuckled lightly. “That is more like it, and about damn time you did that.”

Janeway shrugged it off. “Did what?”

“Oh please, I saw.”

“You saw?” Kathryn heaved a sigh of innocence as she began to move around her sister and to the staircase, where she assumed her mother and Selene were.

Phoebe just shook her head. “Yeah okay, but just so you know I am happy for you, and I hope you hold on to it…her… both of them with both hands.”

Kathryn halted her steps and swiveled back toward Phoebe. “Oh, I plan on it. By the way, try not to interrupt next time.”

Phoebe giggled. “If I didn’t, then what kind of little sister would I be?” she teased. She watched as Kathryn moved up the staircase, then turned her gaze to the window, waiting for Seven to return. “Hey,” she greeted, when the blonde walked back inside.

Seven arched a slight eyebrow at the younger Janeway. “Hello,” she nodded. “Are they upstairs?”

“Yeah, but I need to tell you something first.”

“All right, proceed.”

Phoebe exhaled and moved in closer. “You brought her here and let my sister fall in love her. Please, don’t keep that little girl from her ever again.”

“I don’t ever plan on it. She is Kathryn’s daughter just as much as she is mine. Also, you are her aunt, and I promise you that Selene will always remain part of your family,” Seven told her, then her tone hardened. “But you need to remember that applies to you as well. Don’t become part of her life now, and then later decide you’re too busy for her.”

Phoebe blinked, not at all expecting to hear that. “That little girl in there is a Janeway, and we never turn our backs on family.”

“Good, just keep it that way and we won’t have a problem.”

Just then Gretchen appeared at the top of the staircase. “Seven,” she acknowledged. “Kathryn is just tucking Selene in. I put fresh towels in the bathroom, and I even took the liberty of getting a few items from Phoebe I thought you might need.”

Seven eyed Gretchen then glanced toward Phoebe. “Thank you, but I have all I need right here.” She patted a hand to small satchel she had flung over her shoulder. “I even have some things for Selene.”

“Oh,” Gretchen swallowed. “I um,” she breathed as she began down the steps. “I actually bought her a some things a few weeks back,” she admitted embarrassingly.

A tiny grin of understanding split Seven’s lips. “I see.”

Gretchen took the last step and was now on the first floor. “I hope that is okay.”

Seven moved a little closer to the older woman. “Of course it is,” she inhaled. “You are her grandmother. I was just telling Phoebe I would love for you the two of you to remain an important role in her life from here on out.”

“Oh, of course,” Gretchen stated excitedly, and couldn’t help but sweep Seven up in a huge hug.

Seven finally managed to make it upstairs and checked in on Selene, who was already fast asleep. She showered and changed into the gown she had brought with her, then slowly crept into the room Gretchen had directed her to stay.

She swallowed and shut the door behind her, then startled when she heard Kathryn gasp. She had no idea that she would be in here waiting on her, and had assumed that she was staying with Gretchen or Phoebe.

“Kathryn,” she exhaled softly, turning to greet the other woman.

“Seven,” Kathryn rasped. “Where….” She faded off, too choked up to finish as she stared at the blonde. Her raced from seeing her looking so beautiful….so sensual. _Where did she get that nightgown?_

Seven took a tentative step closer, and right away she noticed how distraught Kathryn was, and her heart leapt up with worry. “Are you okay?”

“You’re beautiful,” she murmured softly. Her eyes never left Seven’s, even though she wanted to scan and take in every inch of her body in this garment she was wearing. It was as if it was see through in some areas, yet then it seemed as if her eyes were playing tricks on her.

Seven dipped her head as a bashful smile stretched out on her lips. “Thank you. And I could say the same about you,” she husked, taking in Kathryn’s sleep attire. It wasn’t anything like her own, just a lightweight sleeping gown, but seeing her this way made her fingers tingled, aching to reach out and touch the skin that peeked out of the fabric.

Kathryn blinked again, her throat suddenly dry as desire ran through her veins, and it took her a minute to get it together. “So,” she began, clearing her throat. “What side of the bed do you prefer?”

“I have no preference,” Seven quickly answered. “You choose,” she said with a sensual smile. “How was Selene?”

Kathryn couldn’t help but stare as they walked over to the bed. She was certain that Seven had worn this particular nightgown just to torture her. Snapping out of it she blinked. “Selene was basically already asleep when I got into the room. She is so precious, Seven.”

Seven neared the bed, then slowly peeled away the very thin robe and placed it gently by the nightstand before pulling down the duvet so she could slide into the sheets. “She must have been exhausted; it was a big day for her,” Seven commented. She was feeling somewhat tired herself, but nothing would keep her from staying alert tonight.

Kathryn quietly gulped, her heart racing. She was starting to question whether she would survive this night as she sucked in a huge breath before finally climbing in beside the very woman she had dreamed of being with for years. _Maybe I’m dreaming right now,_ she thought to herself, and decided if that was the case, she didn’t want to wake up.

“Good night, Kathryn,” Seven husked.

Janeway felt her companion move and then suddenly the warmth from the blonde’s body was enveloping her own. Before she could answer, she felt Seven’s lips hover over her mouth for just a split second before they gently brushed her own in an affectionate kiss.

Kathryn felt frozen, or else she would have reached up and pulled her back in, or at least kissed her back. It took Seven moving to her own pillow for her to finally find her voice.

“Goo….goodnight, Seven,” she rasped, then after another minute she heard the younger woman’s even breathing by her ear, and couldn’t help but blurt out, “I’m so happy you are here,” she stated, turning on her side to face the other woman.

“I am happy also.”

Kathryn’s entire body was reacting to the proximity of this woman. Her lips were still burning from the kiss, her fingers tingled, longing to touch the smooth skin underneath that gown, her arms ached to hold her. Her heart raced in anticipation, urging her forward, yet the butterflies roaring in her gut kept chickening out. Finally, she bolted up. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

Seven leaned up as well, concern filling her eyes, which she had to force to adjust in the darkened room. Her heart sunk at the thought that perhaps Kathryn was not ready for her or Selene after all. “Can’t do what?”

Janeway sharply inhaled as she finally dared to look at the woman beside her. “I can’t just sleep in here with you like this. I thought I could, but I don’t have enough willpower to just lie here,” she blurted. “It’s too hard, especially since…..I just can’t,” she faded off.

Seven opened her mouth to respond, but wasn’t sure what to say.

“Maybe I should just go sleep on the couch,” Kathryn rambled, then began to inch her way out of the bed.

Stunned, Seven was not prepared for that, but she knew she couldn’t let her do this. They had come too far. She swiftly snatched Kathryn’s hand and pulled her back. “Please, don’t leave. I mean, have I done something? Do my implants repulse you now….or….um….I could put my robe back on….I cou…”

“No!” Kathryn cried out. “It’s nothing at all like that,” she told her in a low tone. Her eyes sought out Seven’s, although she could barely make them out in the dark. “The truth is, I just don’t trust myself….well….being this close to you,” she finally admitted, her voice strained with a hunger and need that she knew sounded desperate. “God, I sound awful.” She placed her hands over her face in embarrassment.

Seven inwardly quirked a smile, understanding completely since she was feeling the exact same way. She couldn’t help but shake her head at how absurd they were both being. She realized that this was now on her to make the first move or else she could very well lose this woman again, and she was not about to let that happen. She leaned in slowly until her lips were a mere inch from Kathryn’s ear.

“May I touch you, Kathryn?”

Janeway’s breath caught and her body shivered with eager anticipation and years of pent up desire for this woman, and a low moan reverberated through her.

“Yes, please. You can do much more than just touch me,” she voiced, her eyes widening at her truthful confession.

Seven did not waste a single second as her fingers began to trickle down Kathryn’s arms with a very light touch. She felt the other woman shiver as the breaths that fell from her lips quickened.

“Seven,” Janeway groaned. Her body was dangerously slipping off the edge with just the slightest of touches.

“I just need to know one thing,” Seven husked, a bit hesitant.

“Anything.” Kathryn didn’t even care about how needy she sounded, all she wanted was to feel this woman’s sensual touch.

“If we do this, and tomorrow you tell me that this was a mistake,” she paused to swallow down the lump building in her throat before continuing. “Well, I don’t know what I’d do.”

The sadness in her voice broke Kathryn’s heart, and she drew up so she was closer to the blonde, reaching out to trace her the pads of her fingers against strong biceps. “Never,” she immediately replied, gently reaching up to cup Seven’s cheeks. “You told me earlier that I held your heart.” She smiled when she felt the former Borg nod into her palm. “Well, I swear to you that you hold mine as well. You always have,” she rasped, then leaned in even more until their breaths mingled.

“I love you. I’ve loved you for so long, that I can’t recall not loving you,” she confessed.

She felt the younger woman tremble and then a tiny sob erupted from her throat, and her heart ached at the pain she had put this woman through. She went to pull her in for a hug when Seven lunged forward, plump lips touching hers with a hunger that and need that matched her own. As soon as their lips connected, she felt her body explode with that same fire that always burned for this woman, yet this time it was all consuming as it raged through her, igniting heated sparks in every cell of her body and making her growl into the kiss.

Mouths parted, chests rose and fell as they pulled apart just enough to catch their breaths, their eyes locked onto one another’s as arms and legs shifted, pulling them even closer. Kathryn’s heart skipped a beat with the knowledge that she was about to hold this woman in her arms, and this time, she would not let anything, not even Starfleet protocols, get in the way of what she wanted.

And all that she wanted was to surrender herself to Seven, give herself, heart, body, and soul to this woman and show her exactly how she felt. The burning heat radiated off of Seven’s body that melted against hers, leaving no doubt that Seven wanted her just as much.

Suddenly, Seven felt as if she had transported back….back to when they were the only two people on that planet….and she felt her body and heart buzz with that same feeling of euphoria.

Pulses raced as mouths once again sought out the other. They kissed, tongues meeting as moans mingled out into the quiet room. Splashes of heat spread throughout and settling low, vibrating stronger with each caress.

Touches became more hungry, more demanding, as Seven heard the other inhale a sharp breath, then felt fingernails clawing at her back when she softly cupped a small breast and kneaded it through the fabric of the nightgown. She pulled her lips away just enough so she could speak.

“I love you too, Kathryn. I tried not to, but I failed. My heart has always belonged to you.”

Janeway felt the power of that heartfelt confession pulsate through her entire soul. “I love you so much,” she husked, choking back a sob. “I want you,” she whispered. “And I need you.” Her entire body was screaming for this woman’s touch. “Please,” she whispered.   
  


Forgetting everything that had kept them apart for so long, Seven drew up and slipped off her gown, her eyes never leaving Kathryn’s. Her heart pounded as she slowly began to slide the other woman’s gown up her legs.

Kathryn felt her body tighten under Seven’s sizzling gaze and heated touch, and she swallowed, trying to find her voice. Seven was barely touching her, yet she felt like a loaded missile teetering on the edge.

“You’re so beautiful,” Seven breathed, as she lowered herself onto the older woman.

Kathryn’s eyes closed as she felt the impact of those words, and she surrendered herself to this woman who was so completely and thoroughly loving her. She let go, feeling as if she might melt as the warmth spread through every part of her body.

Seven had felt this before when they had made love for the first time, but she hadn’t thought it would just a one time thing. So this time, she was determined not to let that happen. She twined their fingers together, lifting them over Kathryn’s head and holding them there as she slid in between the her thighs. 

“Don’t let me go,” she murmured.

“Never,” Kathryn immediately responded, arching her neck up and crashing their lips together in a passionate kiss. “You are mine.” She reached up and pulled the blonde back down. Her breath caught in her throat at the sensation of smooth skin sliding across her own, and for a split second she found it hard to believe that they were finally together like this again. As Seven glided against her, they moaned in ecstasy as their wetness filled each other, and Kathryn once again closed her eyes, making a silent vow to never take this woman for granted again.

For the first time since their night on that planet, Seven felt as if she were truly alive. Her skin quivered from the building rapture as their bodies moved together in perfect rhythm. Suddenly, she was there, as her body shivered from head to toe, and she tried with all her might to hold it off, but her efforts were futile and no match for Kathryn’s quivering breaths and quiet grunts. And when she felt eager hands pulling them tighter together just before Kathryn climaxed, her own climax exploded through her with an unexpected jolt, and the knowledge that they had orgasmed together only intensified the sensations, making this better than she had remembered it all those years ago.


	15. Part 15

**Part 15**

Seven’s eyes remained closed as she groggily woke in satisfying warmth and soft loving arms. She had a pleasant sense of things actually feeling right for the first time in her life. She was finally with the person she knew deep down in her heart she was always meant to be with. From the first moment she went nose to nose with this fiery redhead she felt something deep inside, she just didn’t know what it meant at the time. Even when Kathryn pushed her away, she still longed for it, but she never thought she would have it again. This all felt like a dream, but even in her dreams it never felt this good. Inhaling deeply, she slightly stretched, then blinked and snuggled closer to the woman next to her as she softly moaned with contentment. 

Kathryn was wide awake in the early morning light, watching this woman who she had loved so long as she slept in her arms. She reached up a hand to gently touch Seven’s cheek, then trailed her fingers down to her neck before shifting to stroke long blonde hair. Her heart soared at being able to do this, and just when she thought it couldn’t possibly get any better, Seven cuddled in even closer. The feeling of warm breath on her neck began to make other parts of her soar so high, she knew it would be extremely difficult to bring them back down.

Kathryn inhaled an aroused breath and smiled as she bestowed a soft kiss to Seven’s brow. “Good morning, Darling,” she said, her voice raspy and deep.

“Morning, Captain,” Seven teased kissing the neck that she was now cuddled against.

Janeway continued to trace patterns over Seven’s exposed skin. “I have a confession to make.”

Seven immediately went rigid and fear spiked up her spine.  _ This is it. Once again, I’m going to get the brunt of what happened between us last night, just like before.  _ “Um,” she murmured and went to move away from Kathryn’s embrace. 

Kathryn’s forehead furrowed at the abruptness in the other woman, and she wondered what she might have possibly said or done to warrant such a response. All of a sudden, it hit her.

“Oh, Seven, no,” she said, then paused and shook her head as she immediately put her arms back around the blonde, pulling her back against her. “I get how that might have sounded, but trust me, it’s nothing bad.”

Seven inhaled a breath of relief and eventually nodded. “I am sorry, I still worry I suppose.”

“I understand, but Seven, please, you have to know that you’re my heart. Also, if you leave, I am determined to find you and bring you home not matter what.”

Seven offered her a tender smile then leaned in and brushed her lips against the smaller woman’s. “I’m not planning on going anywhere,” she said after they parted, but then her brow hung heavily once more and Janeway knew something was troubling her. 

“What is it?”

“I just remembered, I was supposed to do an evaluation on my slip stream device this morning,” Seven informed, her eyes shining with the knowledge that she had missed doing that and came here instead. It was so unlike her, and that in and of itself bothered her. 

“Oh,” Kathryn nodded somewhat as only to acknowledge what she was telling her. “And I take it that this is a bad thing?”

Seven shook her head and sighed, but still had this faraway look. “Hey, I understand if you need to go,” Kathryn told her, her voice hesitant.

“I do not,” Seven interjected, then finally looked right at her. She knew she had missed it, but this, being here with Kathryn, this was much more important. 

“Seven,” Kathryn growled, her hand drifting to Seven’s butt cheek. She lightly gave it a squeeze, playfully teasing her. “You don’t have to tell me that just so I….”

“I am not keeping anything from you,” Seven said, her eyes flashing heatedly, reaching down to interlace their fingers together. She tried to keep her mind straight from Kathryn’s hand distracting her. “You are more important.”

“I just feel like something is bothering you.”

“Are you now a telepath, Kathryn?” Seven played, her eyebrow rising somewhat as she pulled the older woman back into her arms, their breasts now flushed together.

“No,” Kathryn said and drew back just enough so she could maintain eye contact. “But I’ve known you a long time Seven, and even with this time we had apart, I can still read you.”

“I was required to be there, but it’s clear that I am not. I can only hope that they will understand. I will have to inform them….” she paused, her blue eyes shining with a hint of delight as she leaned in and kissed Kathryn’s jaw. “Later…. mmmm…. much later.”

Kathryn tenderly smiled as her neck arched back, enjoying the play of lips that were now kissing her throat. “Are you sure? I’ve had my fair share of dealings with Starfleet protocols, and I would hate to see anything negative on your record.”

“This is not Starfleet,” she nonchalantly offered as she continued to bestow kisses against the smaller woman’s skin.

Janeway blinked. “What?” She drew back so she could gaze into the other woman’s eyes.

“Starfleet is working as a liaison, but this is through the Stellar Drive Institute.”

Surprised, Kathryn scooted back even farther. “You were on Betazed this entire time?” she huffed. “I didn’t even think of that.”

“Not the entire time,” Seven told her, then puzzlement filled her features. “Wait did you…try to find me?” she faded off as she tried to absorb what she just heard.

“Yes, I did,” Kathryn nodded. “I was on Vulcan, and apparently right after you just left. Then I went to star-ports and other planets and every time I came up empty. I eventually had to go back home.”

Tears filled Seven’s eyes. “You came after me,” her voice was rough. “Again.” Her heart warmed at the idea that this woman actually went after her, even when she told her that they were through. She should have known she would, after all, she did it so many times when they were on Voyager.

The tears in the younger woman’s eyes tore at Kathryn’s heart and she didn’t want that. So she tenderly cupped Seven’s cheeks. “I did, and I always will.”

“Yes, I do recall how often you did that.”

“Oh?”

“I often think about how close you came to be assimilated.”

The gleam in Janeway’s eyes didn’t go unnoticed by the former drone and she smiled. “Actually, I was assimilated.”

“You were?” Seven lightly commented, shaking her head knowing how that really went down.

“Yes,” Kathryn said directly. A teasing smile graced her lips even if she was desperately trying to keep it hidden. “I was assimilated by you, Darling,” she said evenly, as a slow smirk fell over her lips before she slipped them over the other woman’s.

As she continued to kiss her, Kathryn gently maneuvered her body over Seven’s until it was once more completely covering the younger woman’s.

“What are you attempting Captain?” the former Borg bantered, as she slid her arms up under Kathryn’s and moved her hands down across her back. Naturally their legs tangled together, drawing them closer.

Kathryn grinned. “I think you know,” she husked, then dipped her head and continued to kiss her, their tongues sliding together.

Seven felt as if this woman would pull every ounce of oxygen from her body and she had to suck in a huge breath as Kathryn’s lips moved briefly away from her own and began to taste her neck, then lower to her chest.

Seven moaned as her head tossed back.

“Kathryn.” The voice loomed just outside the bedroom door. “I think you should come down to breakfast. Selene is up and is asking for you and Seven,” Gretchen told them, breaking them out of their lust and causing Kathryn to bolt up and remove herself off of Seven, just in case her mother decided to walk in.

She cleared her throat. “We will be right down,” she managed to squeak out, then eyed Seven, who had the most adorable face, and in that moment she felt like a teenager sneaking around. She couldn’t help it, she giggled, and Seven couldn’t help but join in. 

Gretchen smirked. She wasn’t born yesterday; she knew exactly what was happening on the other side of the door. “Make sure you two wash up first,” she added, softly laughing to herself as she went back to the kitchen, where her granddaughter was waiting on her.

“Are they coming?”

Gretchen’s brow rose with that certain wording and now she laughed harder. “Well,” she cleared her throat. “Not now,” she said under her breath, then nodded to the little girl. “But I believe they will be down here very soon.”

…………………….

“Mommy,” Selene greeted her mother as soon as she noticed her walk in, with Kathryn. “Good morning,” she smiled eagerly. “We are making breakfast.”

Kathryn and Seven meandered over to Selene, and that’s where they noticed the wink they got from Gretchen. Janeway’s face immediately flushed and she rolled her eyes.

“You look like you need coffee,” Gretchen pointed out, then offered her daughter a mug. “Would you like a cup?” she asked Seven, now looking at her guest.

“Mom doesn’t drink it, but I’ll take one,” Selene piped in. She smiled cutely, ignoring the look she was getting from her mother.

“I think you should stick to juice,” Seven told her sternly.

Selene pouted and it look so downright adoringly cute that Kathryn wanted to relent and give her some, but knew she shouldn’t. So instead, she changed the subject. “What’s for breakfast?”

“It’s bread stuff,” Selene said with a confident nod, standing on a stool as she helped the oldest Janeway.

Gretchen smirked. “French toast,” she amended.

“Ahh,” Selene exhaled. “Yes, I knew that,” she fretted with a tiny eye role. 

Hearing that made Kathryn chuckle into her coffee, then she noticed Seven’s demeanor had changed and how closely she watched the scene before them. Once they locked eyes, Kathryn knew exactly what she was thinking. 

Kathryn swallowed as her heart leapt up in her chest and she knew she couldn’t put it off any longer. She blew out a nervous breath and eventually nodded her agreement. 

Seven swallowed, then inched closer to her daughter and Gretchen. “Honey, I know you are having fun here with Gretchen, but could you come with me and Kathryn to the other room for a minute? We would like to tell you something.”

Gretchen’s eyes went wide with the realization of what Seven was about to do and her own heart sped up. She drew in a long breath and smiled down at the little girl. “Breakfast is almost done here, Sweetie. You go with them and I’ll have everything ready when you come back,” she said, her voice shaking just a little. “And thank you very much for your help,” she added. 

Selene hopped down off the stool. “What do you want to talk to me about?”

Seven reached out her hand and Selene took it without hesitation as they walked into the other room with Kathryn right behind them. 

“Here, takes a seat.” Seven pointed to the sofa, and followed Selene, then indicated with her eyes for Kathryn to sit across from them. 

Anxiety radiated off Janeway as she took a seat, but as soon as she looked into her daughter’s eyes, it faded away. She didn’t quite understand it, but she had a daughter and was determined to face motherhood like she did with everything else in her life…. head on. 

“Am I in trouble?” Selene asked timidly.

“No,” Seven quickly voiced. “But this is very important, and it is something I should have told you sooner.” The blonde’s chest rose and fell as she sucked in a deep breath. “Selene,” she began, “do you recall that time when you asked me if you had a father?”

Selene squished her lips, and it was clear that she was deep in thought for a moment, then she nodded. “I do, and you said I didn’t.”

“That is correct, you do not. Do you remember what you asked me right after that?”

Selene placed a finger to her lips, then smiled. “I asked if I had another mother, since some of my friends have both.”

Kathryn’s heart soared with anticipation and the knowledge that this was really happening. She was ready for it, however she suddenly felt fear sink through her that this little girl might reject her. She must have recoiled or something, because suddenly Seven’s hand was squeezing hers. 

She glanced in her direction and her soft blue eyes told her that this was going to be okay.

Selene watched the scene before her and blinked. “You okay Kathryn?” Her little voice broke through.

“I am,” she breathed. “I just hope you will be okay.”

Seven watched Selene’s face draw down in wonderment. “She means after what I am about to tell you,” the blonde informed her daughter, which just gave her more of a skeptical face.

“What?” Her voice sounded somewhat distraught and it broke both their mother’s heart from hearing it.

“Remember when you asked if you had two mothers and I never really answered?”

Selene slowly nodded. “I didn’t answer because I didn’t want to lie to you, and I still don’t. So, do you want to ask me that again?”

Selene eyed her mother then shrugged, but she eventually asked. “Mommy, do I have two mommies?”

Now this time Seven nodded. “You do, Sweetheart.”

Selene gasped. “I do?”

Kathryn found herself shaking and she couldn’t contain it. She also couldn’t hold back the tears that found their way to her eyes. “You do. As a matter of fact, you share your middle name with her.”

Selene’s forehead creased in puzzlement, then her eyes shot over to Kathryn then back to her mother. “I do?” she drawled quietly, then her gaze returned to Kathryn and remained. 

Seven looked at Kathryn too, and the Captain knew it was now her turn. She finally pulled herself together and cleared her throat. “Yes, you do share it, you share it with me. And I am so proud to say this,” she inhaled a breath to settle herself. “Selene, I am your other mother,” she managed to say, her voice somewhat choked up. “Sorry I’m not taller,” she added, trying to keep the moment light, but her heart lurched all the same, even more at seeing the blank face on her little girl.

Selene stayed quiet as her face filtered with a few emotions, and it worried both Seven and Kathryn, and the former Borg wondered if maybe she didn’t understand, or even worse, she didn’t approve. Just as she was about to ask, Selene suddenly blew off the couch and jumped right into Kathryn’s arms, hugging her tightly.

“I hoped it was you,” she cried into the redhead’s shoulder, and Kathryn exhaled a long breath of relief as she shook with a happiness she never knew was possible.

Relief spread through Seven as well, and tears of joy trickled down her cheeks as she watched the two most important people in her life cry happy tears. After a moment, Selene pulled back and then slipped a tiny arm toward her. “We can’t leave Mommy out, can we Mom?” she said evenly, her eyes shining.

Kathryn cried harder at hearing that, and she nodded through her tears she moved an arm around Seven, pulling her into her side. “No, we can’t,” she agreed, her voice rough as she hugged the most precious people in her life and swore she would never ever let either one of them go.

After few more moments passed, they all pulled away, smiles evident on their faces that were red and blotchy. Selene sniffed. “May we eat now? I’m sooooo hungry,” she said with exasperation.

Kathryn was amused and gratified that this went so smoothly. Truth be told, she never expected it, and deep down maybe she should have. “Yes, I am hungry too,” she said then gazed over at Seven, and the look on her face was one she couldn’t put a finger on.

“What is it?”

Seven blinked out of her thoughts. “I just…” she swallowed. “I regret so many things.”

Kathryn exhaled, then nodded and laced their fingers together. “I understand, Seven, I do. Because I have regretted so many things in my life, but this right here….” she acknowledged, still holding her hand and Selene’s and pulling them up as if to emphasize them. “This is one thing I will never regret, and I know you won’t either,” she said, smiling at them. “I love you both so much.” It was so freeing to finally say that.

Selene’s eyes brightened. “We love you too…don’t we Mommy?”

Seven grinned. “Of course we do.” The intensity of her gaze sizzled right into Kathryn’s heart. She was feeling so much she just couldn’t help herself as she pulled the taller woman closer and lightly kissed her.

Selene giggled, then turned toward the kitchen, her eyes suddenly going wide. “I have a grandma!” she announced loudly, and suddenly bolted in that direction. “Grandma!” she yelled again.

“Selene, what did I tell you about running inside and yelling?”

“Not to,” she hollered back, but then all Seven could hear was joyous laughter from both her daughter and Kathryn’s mother.

Seven inhaled a breath then a huge smile split her lips as she gazed down at the smaller woman. Seeing her looking so blissful made her own chest burst with happiness. She just couldn’t help herself as she pulled Kathryn into her arms and this time, she kissed her with all the love and passion she had felt for this woman.

“Gezzz do I have to get the hose out?” Phoebe bantered.

The two women broke apart, but Phoebe just winked. “Rumor has it I have a niece somewhere.” She bantered, then turned to head towards the kitchen.

“Aunt Phoebe!” They heard loudly.

Seven grimaced. “Well so much for her inside voice.”

Kathryn chuckled. “Eh let’s let it slide for now.”

An eyebrow arched at the smaller woman. “Oh, so this is how it’s going to be now?” she sighed. “I’ll tell her one thing, only to be out ranked by her other mother?”

Kathryn just looped her arms around Seven’s neck. “No, never.” She nipped at Seven’s pouty lips. “Besides, right now I believe you may out rank me.”

Seven gave her a questioning glare. “You…. huh,” she began, but Kathryn interrupted her.

“Remember I’m on leave, and who knows if they will reinstate me. But I have heard rumors of a new starship, and if I am lucky, I’ll be given the chance to take command of it.” 

Seven inwardly cringed. She knew all about the vessel Kathryn was referring to, and that it would be equipped with a certain slip stream device. Her heart sank and knotted up in her stomach. She had no idea that Kathryn was interested in taking command of the new starship, and now that she was so happy and hopeful, Seven did not have the heart to tell her that she was also being considered to take the helm of Starfleet’s newest vessel. 


	16. 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay

Part 16

After breakfast Kathryn showed both Seven and Selene her keepsake album. They were just looking through the Captain’s teenage years when Seven felt the chirp from the com badge she kept hidden in her jean pocket and knew she couldn’t keep ignoring it.  
“Kathryn,” she stood up. “I need to take care of some things,” she murmured, looking directly at Janeway.

The redhead slid the book into Selene’s lap. “Go ahead, keep looking through it, I’ll just speak to your mother a moment. I’ll be right back.”

“Okay,” Selene said quietly, then the two women shuffled out of Kathryn’s old bedroom.

“What is it?” Kathryn quickly asked.

“I need to speak with Starfleet, and I know it is about me not being at ISP 6 yesterday.”

Kathryn blew out a deep breath. “I understand.”

“I don’t know how much longer I can prolong this stay Kathryn,” Seven relayed, and the older woman picked up the uneasiness in her tone.

“I’m sorry.” Kathryn placed a sympathetic hand to Seven’s and squeezed it tenderly.

“I am not, and if I could, I would delay it for however long.”

“But it’s not up to you, is it?” Kathryn questioned even though she already knew the answer.

“I signed a contract, Kathryn,” Seven voiced, her face full of dismay and apprehension.

Kathryn blinked at seeing this and wondered if there was more to it. “Go get in touch with them, I’ll be here with Selene. Take as much time as you need.”

Seven slowly nodded and went to turn to do just that. She had so much on her mind that she didn’t hear it when Janeway cleared her throat the first time, or the second. In fact, Kathryn finally had to rush over and pull her back.

“Wait,” she breathed. She was only going to give her a kiss, but seeing how Seven looked, so distraught and so distant, worry creased up her spine. “Seven, what’s going on?”

Seven swallowed and even looked away. “I can’t keep this from you, no matter how much it might hurt you,” she inhaled. “I have been….” she began, then stopped and turned around. She couldn’t tell Kathryn that she was being considered to captain of the very vessel she had wanted.

Kathryn’s eyes went wide hearing this declaration of guilt from this woman and she took a step back. She had known Seven for a long time, but she had lived a life after Voyager and experienced a lot of things without her. 

Commander Hanson moved up the ranks in Starfleet, not to mention how she excelled at it. She had even given birth to their little girl and raised her all alone. So hearing this, and seeing this expression on Seven’s face, well, it was one Kathryn knew she had never seen.  
“Who is she?” she instantly went there. Why wouldn’t she, Seven was beautiful and after last night and how she made love to her, she knew that Seven had been with someone else.

Quickly Seven spun back around. “Excuse me?” she barked, her eyes hard.

Kathryn took a breath, her eyes just as firm. “You know what, I should have known, I mean really…look at you. Plus, the way you touched me last night. I know you are a lot more experienced than you were the last time.”

Shocked, Seven just stood there wide eyed and hadn’t a clue what to say to that. "Just be upfront with me, I mean I’ll understand it …I will. You and I haven’t been together so it was inevitable that you would find someone… I get it, I do, but it doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

Seven ran a hand over her face, this was so off base that it really took her a moment to register what Kathryn was accusing her of. She slowly shook her head. “You are wrong Kathryn,” she finally bit.

“Am I?” the Captain went with, crossing her arms. “Tell me, how I am wrong?”

Seven dipped her head, her face now impassive. “Honestly, yes I have been with someone…well someones.” Seven noticed how Kathryn cringed at that confession, and continued. “But that was a while ago…. In fact, it was before I left on the Enterprise,” Seven said. “It hadn’t occurred to me to wait for you. You can’t actually expect me to believe you were not with anyone, especially since you were to be married.”

Kathryn rolled her eyes. “I was not, didn’t get engaged, not even close. It was all gossip, and to tell you the truth Seven, after our night together, you ruined me. I couldn’t even consider being with anyone else.”

Seven shook her head, she had no idea, and she almost couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Kathryn saw how Seven looked as the emotions ran through her. “Yeah hard to believe right? But it’s the damn truth.” Kathryn now turned and walked the few feet away from Seven so she could look out the window.

After a moment of silence, Kathryn heard Seven come in right behind her and it shocked her that she actually was feeling Seven’s arms around her middle. She had always dreamed that she would hold her like this that, and she couldn’t help be compliant in her arms as she found herself drifting against her. “I am sorry, and I should have not copulated with those women. Do you forgive me?”

Kathryn knew that this was juvenile; she also knew that Seven had a life without her and it was something she couldn’t be mad at her for. She slowly turned in her arms and looked up at her. “No Seven, I am not mad about that. I am just worried there is someone else, and I don’t want to lose you.”

Seven quickly shook her head. “Never, I love only you Kathryn.” Seven then bent her head and kissed Kathryn’s lips.

“Then what is going on? Please, tell me what you were trying to tell me earlier.”

Seven closed her eyes only for a moment, then heaved a long sigh. “I have been reassigned.”

That was not even on Janeway’s radar. “You’re no longer on the Enterprise?”

Seven dropped her hands away from Kathryn’s waist and took a few steps back as she nodded. “I am not.”

“When are you due out?” Kathryn asked, her voice almost timid.

“In a few weeks, but right now I know I need to be at that star port so we can equip the ship with my slip stream device.”

Stunned, Janeway shook her head, then blinked. “It’s ready?” she voiced as an afterthought. “Oh my god, this is news! Why didn’t you tell me?”

Seven kinked her head. “Other things have been more important.”

Kathryn had to agree, but this was huge. “Seven, I get that, but my god, this is like the biggest thing since warp drive.”

Seven just shook her head again. “That’s what I been told, but…” she trailed off, her eyes shining with sadness.

Kathryn slipped back inside Seven’s personal space and placed her hands back around her. “Darling, this is a big deal, so why are you so unhappy?”

“Because like I said, I’ve been assigned to a new ship, and with it comes huge responsibilities, and the biggest is…” she was getting choked up and she had to inhale a breath before she could finish. “Is well being away…”

Kathryn knew and so she finished for her. “Away from me.”

“Yes, and well there is more.”

“Hey if you are the newest commander of…..” then it hit her, Seven was the newest commander of the new vessel that Kathryn wanted to command, and if she was commissioned to do that, then how could they continue to be in this relationship?

“Oh I see.” Kathryn now dropped her hands and pulled away.

“You do?”

“You are worried because of our relationship and the command structure, right?”

Seven suddenly knew what Kathryn was referring to and she knew that this had to end. “No I am not,” she stated evenly.

Kathryn whipped back around. “If I take command of that vessel Seven, then there is no way you can be my commander. Not like this, and if Starfleet found out,” she said, forcefully shaking her head.

Seven wanted to roll her eyes at how cocky and absurd Kathryn was being. She didn’t even think once again that Seven was worthy enough to get command of a vessel, let alone the very one she basically built.

“Like I said, I am not worried,” she practically growled.

“You have to be.”

“I really don’t… and the reason is….well, it is because I have also been informed that I am also being considered for the command.”

Kathryn quickly shook her head; her face was blank, yet white as she stared at the younger woman. Her chest heaved a few deep breaths before her eyes blinked as if she had finally heard what Seven had just told her. “You’re…” she exhaled harshly. “You…” she tried again. “Did you just say that they’re considering you to captain the vessel?”

Seven rolled her shoulders back. “I did.” Was her lone reply.

“No,” Kathryn said rather robustly. “You’re barely a commander, what makes you think you can captain a ship?” she blurted, nostrils flared.

That cut deep and this time it was Seven falling back on her Starfleet training. “I’ll let that slide this time, Captain,” she told her evenly, her voice so drone like that it made a chill slice right through Kathryn.

Kathryn ran a hand through her hair. “Seriously, why you?” she heaved. “And why wasn’t I at least informed about this? My god, I’ve been waiting months to hear something on it.”

Seven settled her nerves at the way Kathryn was speaking to her and softened her tone. “I believe if you were to really think on that, you’d know why you were not automatically a shoe in.”

Kathryn was off in her own little world, her mind going place to place, jumping to conclusions as to why this was happening to her. She quickly turned back toward Seven and shot her a hard glare. “That’s what I am doing.”

Seven’s eyebrow rose. “Are you? If you were and were doing it with a clear head, you’d see exactly why.”

Kathryn’s mind flashed and she narrowed. “Because you built the device?” she snapped.

“That’s part of it, well most of it.”

Kathryn clenched her teeth. “God damn it!” she snarled loudly.

“Try to remain calm, Kathryn.”

Flinching, she knew everyone in house had probably heard her. “I just don’t understand. I have the edge, the most experience.”

“Probably. But how many ships have you…..well…” she trailed off.

Catching on, Kathryn’s shoulders slumped. “Oh my god,” she muttered softly. “It’s because of my track record hasn’t been all that outstanding….right?”

Seven didn’t answer, she just dipped her head and tried to catch Kathryn’s eyes, and once she did, Kathryn softly shook her head. “Still,” she muttered. She wanted to say more, but she knew it would only hurt Seven, so she held her tongue.

“I suppose I should have told you as soon as I arrived. But like I said, I had a bigger issue than this….you and Selene,” Seven exhaled. “I also had no idea you wanted to take command of another vessel.”

Kathryn gathered herself by pulling in a deep round of air. “I guess I should congratulate you on being in the running of your first command.”

Seven scooted closer to the smaller woman. “Kathryn, I know this is not an ideal situation. I have faith that it will go to the best one that Starfleet sees fit.

Kathryn nodded and she offered Seven a tender smile. “I know, you’re right,” she breathed. “I shouldn’t even be bitter about this. Hell, I did lose one ship in the Delta quadrant for seven years and then the instant I get another ship, I go off the grid on my very first assignment,” she groaned. “I’m two for two.”

“I am sorry. I should have told you at that party…or sooner…if I had, you wouldn’t have had to risk….”

Kathryn raised her hand up and stopped the former Borg. “Seven, I understand,” she snapped, but then sighed, her jaw hardening. “Maybe this is the universe’s way of telling me that I shouldn’t be a fuc…..” She stopped herself before she actually spit that vulgar word out, but Seven raised a eyebrow anyway.

“Don’t say that, and I am not referring to that F’ word. I am referring to you being a Captain,” Seven exhaled. “You are a great Captain, Kathryn, and if it weren’t for you….” she began to get choked up, and had to pause and draw in a breath. “I wouldn’t be where I am today, and that means I wouldn’t be here with you, and my little girl who is just right in the next room reading with her grandmother.”

That meant a lot for Kathryn to hear, and Seven was right, she also wouldn’t be here either. She’d probably be married to Mark and have like four kids running around. Or better yet, divorced and working on her third marriage. She slightly cringed for even going there. “I will never regret aligning myself with the Borg that day, or severing you from the collective,” she told her honestly.

Seven’s communicator chirped yet again. “I need to take care of this.”

Kathryn nodded. “I will be in there.” She motioned to the bedroom door where Selene was.

“I won’t be too long.”

“Take all the time you need,” Kathryn said, knowing she needed it more than Seven did. She should be happy for the other woman, but she was still reeling over it all. She knew she needed to get a better handle on it, but she missed being a Captain and damn it, she really wanted that position.

Seven nodded and turned on her heel and left. Once she was outside she snarled and clenched her fist as she walked toward the shuttle. “That woman is still infuriating. Who am I kidding; I will never be good enough,” she muttered to herself unaware that Kathryn’s little sister was on the porch swing and heard everything.

  



	17. 17

Part 17

Phoebe quietly watched her big sister playing with her daughter, and as she studied Kathryn she noticed that her eyes shimmered with such happiness, one in which she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt she had never witnessed.

“I hate to interrupt.” She disrupted with a slight cringe. “I just need like two minutes with my big sis.”

Kathryn narrowed in on Phoebe, puzzlement etched her forehead. “What’s this about? And can’t it wait?”

“Like I said I’ll be brief.” Phoebe’s eyes soft.

Kathryn hesitated then turned to her daughter, holding up a hand then folded in a few fingers leaving two up so Selene saw it. “I’ll be back in two minutes.” She then shuffled out of the room, and quietly closed the door. She huffed as she turned and gave her a sister a face saying she needed to speed this along.

“I’m only going to say this once, and I sure hope you actually take it, and understand it, and keep your mouth shut while I do.”

Kathryn blinked. “Excuse m…..”

“I mean it.” Phoebe said forcefully.

Kathryn clamped her mouth shut, but she folded her arms and stared at her with an annoyed expression. “You, big sis are the happiest I have ever seen you. Nothing should be more important than that in there.” She pointed toward the bedroom. “And that woman, that moments ago looked so devastated.” Phoebe exhaled. “You moped around here for over 4 god damn years, and now …you’re what?” She paused, then gave her a look that made Kathryn do a double take. “You’re going to once again let her walk away from you, because of fucking Starfleet.”

Kathryn was stunned, shocked even, that her mouth slightly fell open, but only momentarily. Phoebe was right, what was she doing? She would not allow this, Selene and Seven were way too important. 

“You think I don’t know that.” She said proudly. Even if it took her little sister to put things in perspective, she was still the older sister after all, and she didn’t need to let her know that.

A slow smile creased the younger Janeway’s lips. “As long as you do. I will not let your stupidity get in the way this time.” She winked, and then maneuvered around Kathryn. “Now I want to go spend time with my niece.” She went to go walk into the room when she swiveled her head back to her. “And you should go find Seven.”  
Kathryn sighed deeply, then stood up straight, and actually felt more determined than ever. 

She was just about to step aboard the shuttle, when Seven was starting down the ramp her eyes blinked in surprise at seeing her there. “Kathryn?”

“Seven,” Kathryn exhaled. “We need to talk.”

“I agree.”

“But first, tell me how long I have?”

Seven hesitated, blinked, then sighed. “I need to be there now, but I told them I need at least 15 minutes. They gave me 10.” Even though they both knew it would take a lot longer to get there. 

Kathryn blew a breath out in agitation. “Understood.” She said quietly. “What about Selene?”

An eyebrow raised slightly on the former Borg. “She will come with me.”

Kathryn knew this, but she didn’t like it. “How long will you be…” she trailed off suddenly feeling her throat squeeze, and pivoted away from the blonde.

Silence stretched out between them, and finally Seven took a few steps closer to the older woman. “I don’t want to take her from you, it’s just….well, I am all she’s known.”

Kathryn spun back and pinned her with a hurt look. “And whose fault is that?” She fired without thinking. She growled at hearing it, shaking her head she held a hand up. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” She breathed, tears now in her eyes, and it took her another few seconds before she could even speak. “I don’t want to lose you again….I can’t.” she choked, feeling her throat squeeze.

Seven inched even closer, dipping her head. “I am torn as well Kathryn, you and Selene are my world.” She was feeling weak, and so out of place for the first time since she was informed she was now a singular unit. She reached out and squeezed Kathryn’s hand. “I don’t want to go, but if I don’t…”

“Then you will be where I am.” Kathryn finished.

“That’s not so bad.” Seven said her voice clouded with her own emotions. 

“No, I will not allow that. You have exceeded, and excelled beyond anything I could have ever imagined. And you are too good for this old ex admiral… demoted captain.” She saw a few tears trickling down Seven’s cheeks, and it tore at her heart. She gave her a soft smile before she pulled her into her arms. “But I do love you.” She whispered hugging her tightly. “Go.” She vaguely husked against the shell of her ear.

Seven shook her head, and Kathryn felt it. “I can’t leave you….I can’t.”

Kathryn drew back only so she could lean in and gently kiss Seven’s lips. “Then don’t.” She said evenly as a slow grinned appeared. Seven blinked, she was now confused. “Because I think I shall go with you, at least to San Francisco.” She rasped. “And work on getting clearance to the Star Port.”

Seven’s heart beamed, and now she couldn’t contain her tears as they turned happy. Grasping Kathryn’s cheeks tenderly she pulled her in for another kiss. They continued exchanging kisses until the smaller woman pulled back. “We are so going to be late.”

“I’m already 28.6 hours late.” Seven argued softly keeping her arms well around the smaller woman. “What are a few more minutes?”

Kathryn kissed her and smiled. “I like how you think.”

……….

“This is your place?” Kathryn asked, even though Seven did tell her that just a few minutes before they entered the apartment. 

“You do not approve?”

Selene darted around her mothers, and rushed up to her room. “Selene,” Seven hollered after her. “Please don’t run.”

Kathryn was overcome with how great this place was. “I didn’t say I don’t approve, it’s just….. well….it’s more than I expected, how’s that?”

“Did you believe less or?” Seven trailed off feeling really confused by Kathryn’s comment. 

“Oh no, I’m sorry.” She squeezed Seven’s hand gently. “This is really a nice place. How long have you had it?”

“Not long, we required it before I left on the Enterprise.” Seven relayed, then winked. “I should show you the bedroom.”

Kathryn blushed somewhat, and cleared her throat. “Yeah, but then you’d really be late.”

Seven sighed. “Will you be okay here?” She turned around the small counter that broke way to the kitchen area. 

“Yes, Selene and I will be fine.” Kathryn slowly nodded, following the blonde somewhat. She knew Seven had to go, even if they were trying to belay it. 

“I do not wish to go, especially without Selene.” Seven knew she was in good hands. The thing was this was the first time she was going without her.

Kathryn knew this was going to be hard on Seven, and came to her quickly holding her hands. “I will make sure we are in the area, in case you need to get in touch with us.” She reassured. “Also you have no idea how much this means to me that you are letting me be here with her.”

“I should be back late tonight, like really late.”

“That is if you hurry and get there.” Kathryn kissed her, then playfully swatted Seven on her backside. “Go get ready for work.”

Seven was resistant, but finally went upstairs to get ready. Soon she was back downstairs slipping on her pip for commander. As soon as the former Borg drew her head up she saw Kathryn watching her with a perplexed expression. “What is it?”

“You look really good Seven.”

Seven dipped her head. “And what did I look like before?” she teased.

“Darling, you looked good before…I mean really good, but seeing you in that command color, and seeing the confidence roll off of you, is something else entirely.”  
Kathryn growled, holding out a hand for Seven to take. Once there fingers interlocked, Kathryn swept her up in a fierce kiss. “Hurry back to me….to us.” She whispered against Seven’s mouth.

“I will.” Seven whispered against Kathryn’s lips trying to ignore the pang of leaving them behind echo across her heart.

…………………..

Seven hated the look on her superior once she walked out on the space station. He growled with a shake of his head. “You do know how important this is right?”

“I do,” she concurred nonchalantly.

“So why haven’t you been here?” He snarled. “You should have been here hours ago, and I do mean hours ago.”

“Like I told you I had some personal things I needed to take care of.” She relayed as they walked down the corridor that held the glass pane so she could finally see the ship that was holding her slip stream device. 

Seven raised a brow. “I thought it would be bigger.”

Admiral Scott smirked as he crossed his arms. “You’re just used of the Enterprise.”

“I suppose.” Seven acknowledge, and then gathered a breath. “I shall get to work.”

He nodded, but before she could slip away he cleared his throat. “You do know we have made a decision.”

That halted Seven, but she paused before she turned back to him. “And?” she swallowed.

“All in good time.” He grinned. “Meet me in my office at 0600.” He commanded, then his tone lightened. “Oh and one more thing, I have a surprise for you, so don’t be late.” He then turned on his heel and left.

Seven pulled in a breath and went to board the ship, so she could run test after test.

…………..

Kathryn and Selene enjoyed the rest of the morning, when Kathryn got a call from Starfleet ordering her to come to headquarters. She was excited to finally hear from them, but also annoyed it had to be now.

“Selene honey, how about we run into town, and grab a bite to eat?”

“Oh okay.” Selene agreed. “Where we going?”

“Actually I need to run to headquarters.”

Selene’s face fell. “Oh you have to work.”

Kathryn slightly cringed. “I’m sorry honey, hour tops I swear.”

Selene blew out a breath. “I guess,” she shrugged, turning away half shaking her head. She loved this alone time she had with her new mother, and she just didn’t want this day to end.

Kathryn quickly picked up on it. “Hey Selene.”

Selene turned back to her. “Yes?”

“I know I promised you the entire day, and I know this just came up, but I just really need to go in. I also promise you it will not exceed an hour. Then we will have the rest of the day. In fact how about after I take you to the park?”

Selene’s facial features quickly changed. “Really?” She smiled. “I love the park.”

Kathryn grinned. “So that’s settled, now you just need to decide on what you want to eat.”

“I can have anything I want?” Her eyes went wide.

Kathryn playfully crossed her arms. “Well anything in reason.”

“I know just the place.” Selene said factually.

“Well how about we change, and get to Starfleet.” 

“I’ll race you.” Selene taunted and began to run up the stairs.

Kathryn knew she needed to tell her to not run in the house, and knew that Seven wouldn’t approve, but she decided she would let it slide for now.

……………….

“Okay Selene you need to sit out here with this nice cadet, while I’m inside there.” Kathryn pointed to the Admiral’s door. “Hopefully I will be done in less than an hour.”

“Okay I got my school work. I will get it done as I wait.” She told her plopping down in one of the waiting room chairs.

Kathryn now looked to the cadet. “I owe you for doing this.”

“I have to be here anyways, and it’s not a big deal.”

“Still,” Kathryn sighed. “Promise me you will not let her out of your sight.”

“Calm down, I got this.” the young cadet said. “I babysat for my sister all the time.”

Kathryn turned back to her daughter, and then knelled before her. “I will hurry, and once again I am so happy you are now part of my life.” She added and then proceeded to kiss her forehead. 

Selene just smiled, and continued to read through her assignment.

Kathryn pulled down her uniform, and marched into the room. Right away she was told to take a seat. “I have news,” the admiral said her tone was stern.

Kathryn’s heart raced in anticipation. “Go on.”

“Well it seems we have all came to a conclusion.” She grinned, and Kathryn knew it looked forced which made her now swallow with doubt. 

Admiral Chugunkin now took a seat to the right of Janeway, as he now joined in with the conversation. “You were outstanding as an Admiral, especially when you went on that teaching assignment. We had word with Admiral Shanthi, and nothing but high merits there.”

This was so not the conversation Kathryn thought she was going to have. “Um thanks I think. I mean, I thought this might be about Peregrine.” She asked her voice rough as her brow hung heavy in confusion.

She heard both Admiral Chugunkin and Admiral Hayes sigh. Oh great. Captain Janeway thought. “Yeah about that,” he began. “Well, and to be honest we went over all that with a fine tooth comb. It was really a hard decision for us to make.” Chugunkin said firmly. 

Janeway stayed quiet, prepared for the news she knew she was getting. “You see you weren’t the only one up for that ship. I mean so many were considered. But the needs of that ship outweighed so many others in Starfleet. In fact we never told you, but we are equipping her with a new slip stream device.” Kathryn knew this, well now recently knew this. 

“Okay,” Captain Janeway drawled, trying to stay tight lipped when she just wanted them to just get on with it, instead of beating around the damn bush.

“Anyways,” Hayes began. “We discussed this ship at length, and all though we received your request, and by the way we did give it serious thought. Since you were deemed a hero after all.”

Kathryn’s heart fell she could read between the lines, and that hero bullshit was really starting to get to her. “Get on with it.” she finally snapped, and then recoiled at her slight outburst.

They both raised their eyebrows. “I’m sorry, it’s just I have someone waiting on me.”

They paused glanced at each other then Admiral Hayes titled his head. “You have more pressing matters than Starfleet…. Captain?”

“I didn’t say that, I just said….actually I apologize for my outburst. It seems I can read what is happening here, so I would rather you just rip the band aid off ….so to speak.” She exhaled, and then swallowed.

“Actually we rather think it is great news.” She glanced over at Chugunkin. Then she pulled out a PADD. “Here look through this, and see for yourself.”

Oh Great! Kathryn thought as she began to look through the Starfleet files.

Selene was getting inpatient as she rocked her legs back and forth on the chair. In no time she had all her studies complete. Then she grew bored, and began to watch the cadet that was theoretically to be watching her, flirt with this other cadet. She thought it was hilarious how her voice got all squeaky, and she fawned over this male individual. Then after 5 minutes of watching them she once again grew bored.

So she decided to wander out into the hallway so she could see if she could see something that was worthwhile for her to see or do. She knew that her mother would not approve, and would be seriously furious with her for wandering off. But as she saw it, her mother, well that mother was in space, and very far away right now.  
She grinned as she began to walk further down the corridor, well away from where she actually should have been. On her journey she saw a few other Starfleet officers and she just smiled at them, and acted like she knew what she was doing. Then out of the corner of her eye she recognized someone. Someone she hadn’t seen in a really long time. Her heart soared, and she couldn’t but help run toward them, and she forgot all about how she was suppose to stay right there and wait for her other mother to return.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All mistakes are mine. No beta. ..sorry.

Part 18

“Elara!” Selene shouted as she ran toward the dark haired Lieutenant. 

Elara’s brow rose as she heard her name being called out and quickly turned, her eyes widened as soon as they landed on the small girl running towards her. “Selene,” she gasped with surprise. 

As soon as Selene got to Elara she hugged her waist. “I’ve missed you.”

The Lieutenant hugged her back, and then dropped to a knee. “What are you doing here?” she then glanced over her shoulder hoping she would spot Seven. When she didn’t, she narrowed in on the girl. “Where is your mother?”

“I knew that was you.” Selene blurted, ignoring the question. “Where have you been? You haven’t visited me in a really long time.” She rambled.

Elara felt overwhelmed. “Um,” she blinked. “Wait a second…again, I ask, where is your mother?”

“Which mother?” Selene grinned with a shrug.

Elara narrowed. “Uh Seven, of course,” then started to wonder what Selene meant.

“She’s up at work.”

“Up… at ….work?” Elara mouthed more to herself. “So she is not here?”

Selene shook her head. “No.”

Elara gulped, quickly standing up and taking hold of Selene’s hand. “You’re here by yourself?” She scanned the area, and still there was no Seven.

“Not really,” Selene informed.

“So,” Elara figured. “You’re here with your babysitter?” she questioned even though it kind of seemed unlikely, unless Seven was truly in a bind.

“No.” Selene told her, her voice light.

Elara pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m so confused.” She would just try to read her, since she was part Betazoid, but even with Selene being older her thoughts were still erratic. 

She only had one option. “Come on, we are going to find your mother.”

Selene pulled back as she remembered that her mother Kathryn would wonder where she was. “Wait I need to tell my mom, where I am at.”

“That’s what I am doing.” Elara said, then tugged on her hand leading her to a communications area.

………………

Kathryn had her eyes downcast as she began to walk out of the Admiral’s office. She had no idea that not only she didn’t get the command she was wanting, but they actually told her they were going to reinstate her as an Admiral. So she could continue with the education side of Starfleet. She really didn’t give them an answer she just wanted to get Selene, and wait for Seven to return home.

“Selene,” she called out as she raised her head to the sitting area, but once her eyes landed on an empty chair, and seeing her little girl’s backpack laid haphazardly on the ground her heart rapidly flew up into her chest. “Selene,” she called out louder.

This time the ensigns that were flirting finally noticed. “Oh no where did she go?” The young girl asked, her face shaken.

Janeway glared at the young cadet. “Are you kidding me? I asked you to watch her, and you are asking me where she went?” She growled through clench teeth.

“I uh…” she swallowed. “I only took my eyes off of her for a second.” She blubbered.

“Yeah well I find that really hard to believe. If something has happened to her….so help me.” Janeway warned. She began to leave, then turned back. “Get your asses out there and look for her.” She commanded.

Kathryn pulled in a few deep breaths as she began to storm the area, in search of one little girl. Her little girl. She was so mad at herself for letting this happen, and her stomach churned with uneasiness as she worried for her. “Please be okay.” She whispered to herself.

………………..

Elara finally got in touch with the Starport as soon as she found out where Seven was, and it didn’t take long before her former girlfriend was on the screen.

“Elara?” Seven looked baffled. “This is hardly the time.” She fired. “I’m extremely busy.”

Elara just slowly shook her head, her big brown eyes somewhat sad, as she reached over and brought Selene into view. “I found something that might interest you.”

Shock reigned over Seven’s features. “Selene!” she snapped. “What are you doing there?”

Selene grimaced and scratched the back of her head. “Sorry mommy.” She said softly, her eyes downcast.

Seven growled internally, and tilted her head as she gathered a calming breath. “Why do you have her?” 

Elara firmed her jaw. “Because she found me…..I was actually at lunch, and was heading back to operations, when out of the blue I hear my name. I turn, and guess who it was?” she sarcastically quipped.

Seven drew in another deep breath to settle herself as she pointed a look at her daughter. “Why are you there?” Seven breathed. “And where is Kath…. Captain Janeway? She was supposed to be watching you.”

“She had a meeting.” Selene shrugged; a pout now filled her lips.

Seven gritted her teeth at the thought that once again Kathryn was putting Starfleet first, and not watching their daughter. She should have brought her to the Starport with her. “And where were you supposed to be?”

“I did my studies, but I grew bored. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have wandered off.”

Seven tried to stay calm, but this little girl was her entire universe, and if something were to happen to her, she just didn’t know what she would do. “I see,” she huffed. Her eyes now drifted back to Elara. “Can you please keep an eye on her until I make arrangements here until I can come and get her?”

“I can do that.” Elara said. “I told you Seven, I would always be here for you.”

“I know.” Seven inhaled. “Selene you will stay with Elara until I get there. Do you understand me? That means DO NOT leave her side.”

“Yes, mother.” Selene made a face, brows dove deep in thought. “But what about mommy Kathryn?”

Elara blinked hearing that, and her face went wide with shock with the realization of finally cluing in on whose Selene’s other parent was. 

Seven on the other hand still looked unsurprisingly pissed. “I will figure out where she is, and tell her there is no need for her to have to watch her daughter.” She hissed. 

The former Borg now turned her attention back to the Betazoid human hybrid. “Thank you for doing this. I promise I will get to you shortly.”

“I’ll take her back to my place, unless you want me to take you to yours? I mean I can wait for you there.”

“There will be no need for that!”

The familiar voice broke around them, and as soon as Seven shifted her eyes from Elara to where it came from, the blonde's gaze locked on to those familiar blue-grey eyes. “Kathryn,” she grated. 

Kathryn felt Seven’s heated glare all through her body. She swallowed as she took a few steps closer. “Seven,” she greeted, and actually maintained the level in her voice. 

Janeway knew that this woman would be furious with her; she had every right to be. She basically lost their daughter, on the very first day she had her. Hell she was furious with herself. “I can explain everything, I promise.” She then looked down at Selene. “I’m sorry for leaving you out there. I never should have done that. Please forgive me.”

Selene just smiled. “Of course I do. I was the one who didn’t stay put, and wandered off.” Tears welled up in her little blue eyes. “I’m sorry I did that.”

Kathryn drew in a deep breath, a breath that held so much relief that her precious little girl was okay. “We’ll talk about that later.” She said to her daughter, then turned back to the view screen, and noticed Seven had lost some of the fire that was in her eyes. “It was not my intention to even come in here today, I swear to you.”

Seven felt torn, as anger and relief flowed through her, but she knew she needed to stay calm and hear everything out. She would not do anything rash. “I believe you, but it still happened. What if…” the blonde’s voice trailed off as emotions swelled through her thinking that something horrible could have happened to her daughter.

Kathryn understood, and her throat constricted. “I know, and I feel awful about it.” She exhaled. “I’ll take her home, and I will not leave again until you get back. I swear.”

Seven hesitated only for a moment. “She is your daughter too, so I am having a hard time understanding how this….” once again she trailed off and had to look away.

That cut deep, maybe because it was the truth. Kathryn could not believe she had let this happen. She sucked in a heavy breath as tears filled her eyes. “Never again, I swear to you.” She was making a vow to Seven, and to Selene, but most of all to herself.

All Seven could do was slowly nod. She finally swallowed after a moment and found her voice. “Selene you stay with your mother, no matter what. Do you understand me?”

Selene nodded. “I will.”

“That means you need to listen to her as you do for me, understood?”

“Understood.”

Seven now looked behind her. “I really need to go.” 

Kathryn could tell that Seven was scarcely holding it together, shit she was barely hanging on as well, but she wasn’t the one on duty. “I know, and we will be at home, waiting for your arrival.”

Seven nodded once more, than the transmission ended. 

Kathryn turned and noticed that Selene was still holding Elara’s hand. “Come on I’ll take you home.” She then held out her hand for Selene to take.

Selene quickly went to her, pouty lips in tow. “I’m sorry….I just got bored.” Her face skewed up.

It broke Kathryn’s heart at seeing it. “I know, and I should not have left your side. But it’s over, and I just want to get you home.”

Kathryn now looked up and saw the younger woman giving her a strange look. She didn’t recognize her when she was at that Starfleet party, the same one where this young woman was Seven’s dance partner. But now Janeway saw it, maybe now being in this atmosphere she knew who this woman was, and more importantly who she was related to. She had to wonder if a certain counselor had set them up. “What?” Kathryn bit.

“I should have known,” Elara said, shaking her head.

So surprised by that comment Janeway just shook it off and continued to walk away, but when Elara kept talking, so she had to stop. “Also I hope you know what you have here.”

Kathryn pivoted then narrowed; she didn’t like what this woman was implying. “I do.” She quipped icily.

“Do you?” Elara dared, she knew she shouldn’t be talking to a superior officer like this, but if it wasn’t for this woman, she’d probably be the one who was waiting on Seven’s return.

Kathryn knew, and now she sized her up. “I don’t have to explain anything to you, other than I love my family very much, and I’ll do whatever I have to, to keep it.” She warned.

“If I were you, I would too.” Elara pointed out, then kneeled before Selene. “It was good to see you little one. Oh, and by the way you’ve gotten so tall and looking more and more like your mother every day.” A haughty grin split her lips as she saucily glared up at Kathryn.

Kathryn knew she wasn’t talking about herself, and she wanted to roll her eyes, but she was a fortified captain, and she wasn’t going to let on that any of that bothered her. “Selene, let’s get you home.” 

As they walked back to where this all started Kathryn stared down at Selene. “So how do you know Lieutenant Troi?” 

Selene shrugged nonchalantly. “She used to live with us.”

Kathryn now rolled her eyes. “Of course she did.”

………….

It was precisely 0600 when Seven walked into the Admiral’s office. “On time I see,” the older gentlemen teased.

Seven only raised an eyebrow clearly not amused. “So what did you want to discuss?”

“Have a seat.”

“I prefer to stand, and you just get to the point, so I can get back to work.”

The Admiral slightly shook his head and sighed. “Seriously Seven, you do know how to take the sails out of things don’t you?” He waited and even motioned with his eyes to the chair.

Not liking it, but Seven finally took a seat. “There, is that better?” 

“Yes actually, I rather keep the kink out of neck.” He now laced his fingers together atop of his desk. “So anyways, I think you know why you are here.”

“I believe you are about to give me some news, in which who will be the command of the very first Starfleet vessel that will contain my slip stream device.” She told him bluntly.

“Yes,” he exhaled. “We, well we as in Starfleet have decided that you Commander will be the one that would be the best. We always have thought that, but we still needed to go through the right protocols, and consider all others as well.”

Seven nodded, but it was barely visible. Her chest heaved with the heaviness of this news. She should be happy, but she wasn’t. Clearly it was written all over her face. “Commander?” 

Seven blinked and readjusted her ocular implant. “Do I have to give my answer right away?”

That stunned the Admiral. “Wait, you don’t want this opportunity?” 

“I just have a lot to consider.” She softly heaved.

He nodded. “Your daughter?”

“Yes.”

“We took that in consideration, and we made all the arrangements so she will accompany you.”

For the first time in a really long time Seven felt the stirring of a headache. “I understand, but I still need to consider all options, especially what is right for Selene.”

He slightly smiled, nodded once more then stood up. “I realize your reluctance here Commander, so I have thrown in that surprise I told you about.” He then went to the door and opened it.

“I am here, because apparently this ship needs a science officer, and I jumped at the offer to be under your command.” He expressed earnestly. 

Seven blinked hearing his comment, and took a step back. “You will be on the Peregrine?”

“Yes.” Right away he noticed her hesitance. “You don’t approve?” concern filled his voice. 

“No, I love that, it’s just…” she trailed off as she turned and looked to the Admiral. “I need to have a moment with this Lieutenant?”

The Admiral blew out a breath, then patted Icheb on the shoulder. “Please talk some sense into her.”

“Will do, sir.” Icheb relayed.

As soon as he left, Icheb’s brow furrowed. “What is it, Seven?” he used her name, and not her rank since he knew this had to be personal.

“I have a lot to consider.”

“You are talking about Selene?” He loved that little girl, in fact he thought of her as her as his little sister. “You do know how much I will look out for her.”

“I know you will, but that is not the only problem.”

“What is it?”

“The thing is my heart can’t go out there for however long without….” She trailed off her eyes closing as she tried to ignore the pang in her chest, and the tears that sprung to her eyes. 

“Seven, what are you talking about?”

“I don’t think I can accept this position.” She vaguely said, looking off into the distance.

Icheb scratched his head. “Why not? I mean this is what you’ve been working so hard for, and now you have it.” He tried to reason. “Why would you want to walk away from it now?”

In that moment all Seven could do was think about….. was Kathryn, and Selene, and the fact that they were finally a family, that family she had always sought after, even before she knew about Selene. It was all she had ever wanted, it was never about Starfleet, or some command.

“Because Icheb, I finally have everything I have ever dreamed of.” She voiced turning back to the Brunali. 

He still looked perplexed. “I uh…”

“I never told you who’s Selene’s other mother was.” 

His eyes squinted in thought as he waited for Seven to finish. “And you Icheb, you actually know her, very well I might add.” She paused then a soft smile fit her lips. “And if I recall you did say something about Selene one time, and how she reminded you of someone, but then that would be impossible, you concluded.” She began to clue him in.

Icheb’s eyes went wide, as all of it slipped into place. “Janeway,” he whispered more to himself.

“And I can’t take Selene away from her, not when they just found each other.” Tears now glossed over in her blue eyes.

It wowed him hearing this, frozen in place; he almost waited too long and missed the blonde as she began to shuffle away from him. She had her hand on the door ready to fling it open….to tell the Admiral she was not accepting his offer, when Icheb stopped her. “Seven don’t be rash about this.”

She pivoted her head, and pinned him with a look. “This is not rash, this is what I want.”

“You’d throw all of this away….for her?” He knew her answer, but he also knew there was another way. He just needed her to get on board with it.

Seven didn’t even hesitate. “Yes,” she exhaled, even though there was time, she wished Kathryn would have given it all up for her. But right now that didn’t matter, she knew what she wanted, and what she’d give up, but she also knew what she’d gain too. 

She turned to open the door once more, when Icheb pulled her back, and this time with so much force she had no choice but to turn towards him. “What?”

He only grinned. “How much do you love Captain Janeway?”

She gave him an odd look. “You know how much, that’s why I am doing this.”

“Okay,” He drawled. “And how much do you want to be, and stay a family….forever?”

Seven was getting annoyed, and again went to walk away even yanking herself free. “That’s what I am doing.” She hissed.

“Think about this, you can have it all. That is, if that is what you want.” He said firmly, louder even. “You just have to be brave and ask.”

Seven stopped, a line etched in her brow deep with thought, then slowly she turned her head at him, her eyes narrowed, and suddenly it was like she was linked back with the collective and it finally hit her.


	19. Part 19

Part 19

Kathryn had just sat down after reading and putting Selene to bed. It really didn’t take long, just three pages before she was out.

She could finally take a moment to herself and relax with a whiskey sour. She thought about Seven, and what her life must have been like with Selene as a baby and all the things she must have had to endure as a single parent. If she had only known, if Seven had only told her, then she would have been right there in sharing the duties.

Kathryn sighed as she rubbed a hand to her brow, knowing all she had to do was give in to her desire to be with the one person she loved and ignore the protocols of what the command structure entailed.

That was then and this was now, and now she was exhausted just after one day, one day in which she about messed it up permanently.  
“Oh, I hope not,” she muttered softly to an empty room.

She knew Seven was angry, and she had every right to be. She had promised to look after their little girl, and in one single moment of her putting Starfleet first, she about lost her. Oh how it all seems to come back around.

She rested her head back against the sofa and stared up at the ceiling, hoping Seven would just get back so she could tell her how sorry she was. She also had the whole Admiral thing weighing on her, not only that, but she was worried about Seven’s next assignment and where would that leave them.

Kathryn closed her eyes and sighed when she heard a knock on the door. She blinked and narrowed in on it for a moment. Had Seven forgotten her key? She quickly placed her drink down on the coffee table, and went to the door.

“Seven?” she hollered out.

“It’s me,” the recognizable gruff voice broke through, and Kathryn blinked, then took a step back, but only for a moment as she then proceeded to open the door.

“Chakotay?” she greeted with surprise, even though she knew it was him. ‘What are you doing here?”

He smiled as he threw his arms around her. “Kathryn,” he exhaled. “I haven’t seen you in so long,” he uttered as he drew back to look down at her.

Yeah because I been avoiding you, she thought. “Oh yeah, um how long has it been?” she asked, knowing full well how long it was.

“Since, um, well since Voyager came home.” He knew that, and he also knew that she knew that. “So what are you doing here?” he asked lightly, although deep in his heart he knew exact why she was there.

“I think you know.” 

He chuckled softly and nodded. “So, are you going to let me in?”

Kathryn twisted her lips in thought and shifted her weight as she finally moved out of the way so he could come inside. She shut the door then turned, seeing his boyish expression, one that she hadn’t seen on him in a really long time. “Is Seven here?” he asked, looking around.

“She’s not,”she said candidly, licking her teeth as she tilted her head. “Was there something else?”

“Oh wow,” he swallowed. “You’re not happy with me, are you?”

“And what gave you that idea?”

He sighed, knowing why that was. “I understand, but the truth is, I did tell her to tell you as soon as she found out.”

“Did you now?” she questioned, but it was more of a statement.

“I did, and if I were you, I’d be angry too.”

“So why in the hell didn’t you tell me?” she fired.

He exhaled slowly as he shook his head. “Was it really my place to do that?”

Kathryn ran a hand harshly over her face and stepped around him. Picking up her half whiskey sour, she poured the remains of it down her throat. “I lost years of her life,” she edged out of her tight lips. Facing away from him, she gazed at a photo of Seven and Selene sitting on a shelf.

“I know,” he paused as he let her have a moment. “But now you know, and well, from the looks of things, being here and all, I say you now have the rest of her life,” he breathed. “That’s got to count for something.”

She spun back around and leveled a glare at him. “You’re right it does, and I will not let any of them go.” Her eyes bored into his, as if telling him that he better just stay on the sideline this time.

A tiny smile split his lips. “That’s good to hear. Honestly, I am glad.” He now held out a small bag, one in which Kathryn hadn’t noticed until now. “I brought this over for Selene.” He looked up the stairs then back to the older woman. “I’m guessing she is asleep.”

“She is.”

The former commander only nodded. “I figured, it is pretty late.”

“It is …isn’t it?” Kathryn said with an edge to her tone. “So does this happen often, you come a calling this late?” she goaded.

He reared his head back, pinning her with a look, then took a second to gather himself. “Kathryn, what are you trying to say?” he asked calmly.

“You know exactly what I am saying. So, do you?”

He shook his head. “No,” he said flatly. “Also, I don’t like you accusing me of that, and I am pretty sure Seven wouldn’t either.” His forehead scrunched. “Kathryn, what is going on here?”

She knew she was acting like a fool and she needed to stop, so she stepped around him once more and went to the kitchen and replicated another drink. “Do you want one?” she offered, but he sensed she was still managing her frustration.

He quickly shook his head. “No, in fact I can’t stay. I have date.” He knew he didn’t need to tell her this, but given the way she was acting, he decided to give her this.

“Oh,” she said, as she took a sip of her whiskey then closed her eyes and sighed at the way she was behaving. “I’m sorry,” she finally said. “I don’t know why I…” she trailed off and groaned.

He took pity on her and came closer. “Because you are still mad at me for not telling you about Selene, and that I got to see her grow up, all the things you missed out on.”

He was right she was angry about that, but she was also angry at him for taking Seven away from her. Well, technically she threw Seven away, but right now she would rather blame him.

She took another swallow of whiskey and closed her eyes to balance herself, and even took in a few slow breaths. “Tell me one thing?” she asked him her eyes never leaving his.

“What?”

“Do you still love her?”

He absorbed this, opened his mouth and then stopped, then tried again. “I do,” he started, but then quickly held a hand up for her to stop whatever rant she was about to unleash. “But it is not like that. Besides, even if I did love her in the way that you are thinking, she could never love me, not in the way, the way she loves you,” he husked. “Kathryn, it has always been you.”

For some reason hearing that fall from his lips made something stir inside of her, as she realized that she was being an idiot yet again. Emotions ran deep, and she had to slide her glass across the counter as she laid a hand to her forehead. “I don’t know what to do,” she breathed as a lonely tear ran down her cheek.

He blinked, and was perplexed at seeing this, and even though he didn’t understand it he came to her side. “Kathryn, what is it?” he asked, his voice a little stressed. “What’s going on?”

She raised her head and looked at him. “She has this outstanding career now, and I ….well don’t. I’m going to hold her back,” she choked. “How do I live each day without her or Selene?” she muttered, feeling the effects from the alcohol. “Plus this is practically through the works of the Stellar Drive institute. So that means….” she trailed off; she knew she was being irrational and very jealous.

Chakotay’s brow furrowed in thought. He knew he had never seen this woman like this; if he had it had been a really long time. “Kathryn,” he began. “What are you worried about…really?”

“What do you think?” she huffed. “I’m going to lose them …yet again.”

He slowly nodded as he tried to take this entire thing in and tried to understand what she was getting at. Then a tiny grin split his lips in thought. “Kathryn, I guess it is time you put up…or shut up,” he teased.

She shot him a look, as if daring him to continue. He just chuckled softly and patted her on the shoulder. “I think it is time I got to my date, and you dear friend, need to do what you should have done years ago….and by years ago I mean while we were on Voyager.” He turned to leave then swiveled back. “Give me regards to Seven, and Selene.” Then just like that he was gone.

Kathryn stared at the closed door for a long time, so long that her feet began to hurt as she stood there against the kitchen counter. She then glanced at her drink, then at the photo of Seven and Selene. It actually took that long for her to finally figure out what he was trying to tell her.

Her heart accelerated as did the breathing in her chest. Sweat beaded on her brow as her anxiety rose. “Oh god,” she gulped as nerves ran around her. She never ever felt so much tension in her body ever.

“I don’t know why you’re so worried,” she relayed to the empty room. “I mean what’s the worst that could happen?”

…………………….

Quietly, Seven opened the door to her apartment, and right away she noticed that Kathryn was on the sofa, and by the looks of it she was dead asleep. She knew it was late, but she didn’t know that this woman would have waited up for her.

As she got closer to the older woman she could see how the stress of the day had taken a toll on the Captain. Seven’s heart ached as she wished she had some way to make this easier, but she knew what she had to do, and was ready for it.

Then her heart warmed as she gazed lovingly at this woman and she slouched down beside the couch so she was just inches from Kathryn’s face. “Beautiful,” she rasped.

Kathryn must have sensed her and heard her voice, because she blinked her eyes open. She stared at the former Borg for a moment, trying to register if she was awake or still dreaming.

“Hey,” Seven said softly as she reached out to run her fingers lightly along Kathryn's cheek. “Sorry if I woke you.”

“I waited up,” she muttered with haziness, then began to scoot up. “I guess I dozed off.”

Seven nodded and looked to the spot beside her. “Do you want some company?” she asked, not really knowing what to expect. “Or would you….” she trailed off with a shrug.

Kathryn didn’t even hesitate. “Yes, please.” She even moved to make more room.

But what Seven did next completely threw Kathryn off as the younger woman didn’t take the spot next to her, but instead positioned herself in behind her. Once Kathryn understood, she found herself leaning forward.

Seven wrapped her arms tightly around Kathryn as she slid them back down on the couch.The older woman’s head and shoulders were now supported by Seven’s arms and chest.

Seven needed this, and so she nuzzled the auburn hair, hugging this woman as close as she could. For several moments, they snuggled together in silence, and Kathryn welcomed it, and was so thankful she wasn’t getting reamed out.

After a few minutes, Kathryn raised her head. “Darling,” she said quietly, with the greatest of care. “Are we okay?” she asked, her voice thick with sleep. “I mean, I am so sorry about today…I shouldn’t have….”

She was rendered mute as a slender finger was pressed to her lips. “I know, and I was angry about it at the time, but she is safe. Besides, I have everything I have ever wanted, so I am letting you off the hook this time.” Her eyes twinkled softly, truth behind every word.

“There will not be another time,” Kathryn told her, and in her heart she deeply wondered about that, knowing if Seven left she would never get a chance.

Seven pondered on that, and seeing the look Kathryn was giving her tore at her heart. “You are worried,” she stated.

Kathryn hated that Seven could read her so easily. “How can I not be?”

Seven inhaled slowly. “You got news?” she inquired.

Kathryn nodded, but her eyes never left Seven’s. “I know you have news as well.”

Seven closed her eyes for a brief second and then she nodded. “I do.”

Kathryn swallowed. “You’ve been reinstated.”

Seven reached around then and found Kathryn’s hand, lacing their fingers together. “I have,” she began, but got cut off with the loud groan that erupted from Kathryn’s throat.

The older woman even went to pull away, but Seven wouldn’t let her. “Listen, please.”

Kathryn sucked in a ragged breath and finally relented. “Okay,” she breathed.

“I have not only been reinstated, but I have finally been offered my very first command,” she told her and Kathryn picked up on how bleak she sounded. She knew if this was any other instance, there be nothing but excitement.

“When are you due out?” Kathryn managed to barely say, getting choked up.

Seven just gazed into her eyes, her facial features unchanged. “I did not give them an answer. Honestly, I was ready to tell them no.”

Kathryn’s eyes went wide, and this time she actually managed to pull away from the other woman so she could stand up. “What?” she snapped, as she pulled in a deep breath.

Seven swung her legs around and off the couch as she looked up at the Captain. “But I have yet to do so; I wanted to discuss it all with you first,” she informed as she stood up as well. “Icheb gave me some things to think about.”

“Icheb?” Kathryn repeated, giving her a look.

“He had been reassigned to me, to the Peregrine.”

“Oh, okay,” she said, but didn’t give Seven anything else. She crossed her arms, keeping her gaze well away from the former Drone.

“It’s not okay,” Seven responded firmly. “I cannot accept this position.”

Kathryn turned, her eyes determined, yet they had a little glimmer of sadness in them. “Why not, Seven? I mean, you’ve come so far and….this is….”

“Why not?” Seven interrupted. “I think you know why I cannot do this.”

Kathryn felt that knot returning to her chest as tears stained her eyes. “I can’t let you do this.” She tried to stand tall, but was wavering.

Seven sucked in a breath as she searched deep within her to find the words. “You have no other choice. I can’t go on and pretend that being away from you is okay, because it isn’t. I no longer want to go explore the universe without you. I am also tired of dreaming of you, when now I can actually wake up with you next to me.” Seven now stepped closer, her eyes soft and sincere. “I will not allow you to miss anymore time with your daughter, or keep her from you.” She dipped her head. “Please don’t make me…don’t tell me it’ll be a mistake.”

“Seven,” Kathryn husked. “Never will I use that word again.” She gazed up at Seven for a long moment, trying to gather her courage. “The truth is, I never want to be apart from you again. Remember I told you that I’d just find you and bring you home?” She now reached out and laced both their hands together. “But that being said, I can’t let you give up on all that you have worked for ….just for me.”

Seven quickly shook her head. “Not for you, for us.”

Kathryn just pulled Seven in closer. “I love you Seven, and god I hope this is what you want.”

“It is what I want…like I said, I don’t care about some command.”

Kathryn slightly smiled as she drew up one of Seven’s knuckles and placed a tender kiss to it. “I just want you to know that what I am about to do has nothing to do with you getting that command. I mean, yeah, it’s a little sooner than I’d like, but at the same time, it is long overdue. In fact, I should have done this the very moment you came to see me in my ready room. I often think about how different our lives would have been if I had.”

Seven’s eyes narrowed with uncertainty as she shook her head. “I don’t understand.”

“Maybe if I do this…you will.” She then slid down on one knee, but kept hold of Seven’s hand. “So,” she blew out a nervous breath.

“What are you attempting?” Seven asked, even though deep within herself she had an idea, and moisture began to fill her eyes.

Kathryn looked up at her, face full of love. “I wanted to ask you something.”

Seven felt the loud pounding of her heart and she shook her head. “No,” she whispered.

“Uh no?” Kathryn now felt her world beginning to spiral out of control, like a certain lost ship being catapulted through space.

Seven now slid down on her knees so she was now back to eye level with the woman she loved. “Only because this is something I wanted to do,” she smiled.

Kathryn exhaled. “Yeah, well I beat you to it. And like I said, it’s something I should have done a long time ago.”

Seven held her smile. “You’ve yet to ask me, Captain,” she toyed.

Kathryn never let her eyes leave Seven’s. “So, Commander….no let me rephrase that, Captain. My Seven of Nine, the mother of my daughter and the woman that has always owned my heart. Will you marry me?”


	20. Part 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story has finally came to and end, but letting you know I will be adding a epilogue. Also small stories with our leading ladies in this same universe.

**Part 20**

The hum of the ship’s warp drive sounded all around her, as she once again did something she had sworn never to do. She felt disgusted with herself, and had been preparing for what was to come and what she needed to say.

Blowing out a nervous breath, she adjusted her shirt just before the doors to the bridge opened with a whoosh.

She stood tall as she strutted through the room. “Captain on the bridge,” she heard called out. Grimacing, she shot a hard glare at the crewman who had made the announcement.

Right away he realized his mistake. “Sorry, Capt….Sorry ma’am.”

She waved him off. “It’s okay, but you better not let that happen again.” She leveled him with another hard look as she hid her grin.

Unable to stop herself, her eyes lingered on the captain’s chair, but only for a second. She turned her gaze to the first officer. “I need to speak with the Captain,” she rasped.

He grinned. “She’s waiting on you.”

“I’ll just,” she responded, pointing to the captain’s ready room. She now stood outside and chimed the door.

“Come,” she heard right away, and stepped inside.

Janeway narrowed in on her spouse. Her eyes were down and she was working very hard on something, so much so that she didn’t even look up to acknowledge the older woman. Clearing her throat, she waited. Even though it had been months since they departed, it still felt a little odd being on this side of things.

Finally Seven lifted her head, and her gaze was blank. “Ah, there you are.” She now tilted back in her chair and proceeded to wait.

Kathryn thought she looked sexy as hell giving her that look, but she knew that Seven was on duty, and even though she wanted to throw her on top of her desk and have her way with her, she also knew that this was hardly the time. “So, I am guessing you heard about my little situation?”

Seven tilted her head and narrowed in on her wife. Her heart rate accelerated at watching her try to come up with the reason she had lost their daughter yet again. She looked absolutely adorable, and for some reason she couldn’t stay mad at her. In fact, right now she wanted to do things to her, things that even though they were married, would seriously violate several Starfleet protocols. “I have, and I am curious to know how exactly that happened,” she said, keeping her desire in check.

Kathryn moved further into the room. “Well, you see, I was helping Icheb with this new find and well….” She trailed off. She knew it was a lame excuse, but it was all she had.

Seven couldn’t contain the seriousness in her face, let alone in her voice as she shook her head and stood up, coming around to stand in front of her. “You do know that isn’t your job?”

“I know, but he asked, and I didn’t think it was a big deal.”

Seven smiled and unable to keep at arm’s length any longer, finally slipped her arms around her partner and brought her close. “Not a big deal at all. Good thing there isn’t a lot of places where a little girl can hide on this ship.”

Kathryn ran her hand up Seven’s back. Although she loved how she looked in her new uniform, she would much rather have her out of it. “I swear she was with me, and then…..poof…gone.”

Seven sighed. “Well, you know she gets when she is with Tristan.”

“That boy is a thorn in my side,” Kathryn grated through a tight lip.

“Yeah, well this ship has a few families on it, not just us,” Seven reminded her.

Kathryn nodded. Unable to wait a second longer, she covered Seven’s mouth with her own, slipping her tongue through her lips with a tender intensity and touching it against her wife’s.

“God,” Seven breathed, tearing her mouth away. “We need to halt this or ….maybe I better just seal the door,” she panted.

Kathryn kissed the side of her jaw. “No, you are needed here, so we can continue this later.”

Seven reluctantly pulled away. “We better.”

“Yes we better,” Janeway relayed. “You do know how long it’s been.”

“81.6 hours to be precise.”

Kathryn chuckled. “Huh, I could have sworn it was longer.” She reached back out and grasped Seven’s hand. “You do know we are still considered to be in that phase?”

The twinkle in Seven’s eyes didn’t go unnoticed by Kathryn, and the Captain whisked her back into her arms. “Yes I do know, and I promise I will make it up to you.”

Janeway reached up and fingered the pips on Seven’s collar. “Oh,” she nonchalantly voiced. “I do have a few scenarios in mind.”

Seven dipped her head down as she looked into Kathryn’s eyes. “Really,” she drawled. “Do tell.”

Kathryn arched her head back and traced her fingers over Seven’s brow, then down her cheek.She continued to trace them over her lips, before her own lips moved once again over her wife’s. “Oh I don’t know, maybe where this Captain has to throw this certain someone into the brig, because she is being impossible and maybe they have this moment,” she shrugged.

Seven’s ocular implant rose. She knew of a moment just like that, and she grinned. “Oh I think we can handle that. But who will be the one that gets thrown into the brig?” She glared in a very confident manner. “Because I am a certified Starfleet captain.”

Kathryn laughed at that. “Oh yes you are,Dear.”

The computer chirped, requesting Seven’s presence in engineering. Kathryn groaned, and finally relented. “Go on,” she exhaled.

Seven nodded, but pulled her close and kissed her before she drew back. “Oh,” Kathryn began, catching Seven before she left. “I do have another fantasy.”

That halted Seven and she spun back to her. “Oh really?”

“Hmmm, well it involves a certain blonde astronomics officer and a certain lost captain,” she said saucily, her lips curved in a sultry smile.

Seven had that very fantasy, but she wasn’t going to let on. “Hmmm that sounds interesting, you’ll have to tell me more about it someday.” She gazed softly at her spouse for another second. “I’ll see you at 1800.” She then turned on her heel and left.

Kathryn walked to the viewport in the room and watched the distorted stars fly by. She had been here before, but things were definitely different now. She rubbed the ring that was on her finger and smiled down at it. They had married in haste. In fact, only the three of them were there, but she wouldn’t change it for anything. She was also well aware that her mother was planning a big wedding for them when they returned, pulling out all the stops. When she was engaged to Mark, she kept postponing and avoiding all things related to their wedding that never was. But this time, she was not annoyed at all, in fact she actually welcomed it.

She wanted the entire universe to know she was Seven’s wife and Selene’s mother. She wasn’t a captain in Starfleet, shoot she wasn’t even an officer aboard this ship. No, she was plain old Kathryn Janeway, Seven’s wife and Selene’s mother, and nothing mattered more than that. 

The computer chirped on Seven’s desk, alerting that some diagnostics had been completed. She knew she probably shouldn’t look, but old habits die hard. Curious, she shrugged, thinking how bad could it be, so she snuck a glimpse at what Seven had been working on._I am the Captain’s wife after all._

Plopping down into her wife’s chair, she brought up the information, and right away noticed it was a star chart. Not just any star chart, but a really familiar one, with a certain planet located just ahead of the ship’s trajectory. Her eyes widened as she took it all in, and her heart twisted in her chest. “Why didn’t you tell me, Seven?” she said to herself as she stood up, her mind racing with what this could mean for them.

Kathryn needed to decide what she wanted, not just for herself, but for Seven. They hadn’t talked about it, but then again, when would they ever get another chance like this?

Janeway was a ball of nerves waiting on Seven to return to their quarters. “I really need to cut back on my coffee intake,” she muttered to her shaky hands, and then plopped down on the sofa and reclined back in thought. _This is big, I mean huge …I have to factor in that we are very far from home again, and what if something happens and we are stuck out here? Not only that, but Seven is a Starfleet captain now. Ughhhh!_

Just when she wanted to pull her hair out, she heard the hiss from the door to their quarters. Eager to talk to her spouse, Kathryn flew up from the couch. “You are early,” she greeted, and right away noticed how tired Seven looked.

“Yes, I needed to just get away from there.” She ventured into the kitchen area. “Uttaberry wine,” she ordered from the replicator.

It was rare to see Seven drink, so Kathryn knew it must have been a crappy day. She decided that maybe she would wait to tell her wife about what she found in her ready room earlier.

Kathryn watched her take a few sips from her glass. “You really picked up a lot of Betazed culture,” she said, pointing to her glass.

“I like it, it’s very pleasing to my palate.” A tiny smile filled her full lips as she shook her head.

Bemused by Seven’s reaction, Kathryn was intrigued. “What’s so funny?”

“I said that before,” Seven relayed with a tired sigh.

Confused, Kathryn’s forehead creased. “You did? To me?”

Seven shook her head once more. “No, to Chakotay,” she said off handedly, then noticed Kathryn’s slight eye roll. “What?”

“Nothing,” Kathryn waved it off. “I just have to remind myself you had this entire life without me, and I’m the one to blame.

Seven noticed her wife’s forlorn expression and slightly smirked as she sat her glass down. She moved within Kathryn’s space and wrapped her arms around her, her smile soft as she bent her head and captured her lips in a fierce kiss. “You do not need to do this; it is all in the past,” she murmured.

“I know, but that’s not all that’s weighing on me,” she sighed, her lips thinning into a slight frown.

“Oh?”

Kathryn reluctantly twisted out of her spouse’s arms. “I need to tell you something, and I really regret that I did this,” she admitted with a huge breath, then looked away.

A troublesome pang filled Seven’s chest. “What did you do?” she asked, her voice flat.

Kathryn quietly bit the inside of her lip as she inhaled another breath. “I was in your ready room, and after you left I caught myself staring out of the viewport there.”

That crumpled Seven’s brow with confusion. “Um, that isn’t a big deal…I don’t thi….”

“No Seven,” Kathryn interrupted. “It’s what I did after.”

Seven eyed her drink and then went to it and sloshed more of it down her throat. “I think I might need this,” she told her. “Go ahead, I’m listening.”

Kathryn rubbed a hand over her face and groaned, then pinched the bridge of her nose. “Like I said, I shouldn’t have, but I heard the indication and it got my curiosity up.” She now turned and looked directly at Seven. “I saw it.”

It took longer than Seven would have liked for her to catch on to what her wife was trying to tell her. She closed her eyes and now gathered her own breath. “I was going to tell you.”

“When?” Kathryn asked, trying to keep the tone in voice neutral.

Seven sat her glass back down and reached out to take Kathryn’s hand. “Honestly tonight, well after we went to bed ….and well, after I did that thing that you like,” she smirked. When she didn’t get the reaction she was hoping for, she sighed heavilyand just pulled on the hand she was holding, making Kathryn fall right back into her arms. “I promise I was…it just isn’t something that is easy to bring up. But to be honest, I have thought about it. The thing is have you…I mean, I’m wondering have you ever….I mean even considered it?”

Kathryn blinked as she thought on it, and all she could do was shrug. “I know I have so many regrets when comes to Selene, but that’s it. I would never do anything to replace her,” she quipped, trying to make Seven understand that. “But I have wondered if maybe one day we could…god I don’t know,” she voiced raggedly, pulling yet again out of Seven’s arms and running her hand through her hair. “This is just…. you know…. sudden.”

Seven nodded, her eyes slightly dismayed. “I know, but the thing is….well….” she trailed off and let the air fill her lungs before she let it out slow. “Well, we just don’t know if we will get another chance to be here.”

The expression on her face tugged at Kathryn’s heart and she quickly went to her and flung her arms around her, pulling her into a close hug. “Oh Seven,” her voice quivered. “Is this really what you want?”

Seven drew back just enough so she could gaze down into her spouse’s eyes. “The gift I got is so precious, and to be honest she is all I need, but I would do this for you if that is what you want. I think about seeing you holding the newest member of our family in your arms and it brings me such joy, the same joy I had holding Selene, which you missed out on”

They stayed together for a moment, enjoying the warmth of one another, when the hiss of the doors interrupted.

“Moms!” Selene rushed in. “Guess what?” she exclaimed.

Kathryn and Seven turned and greeted their daughter. “What?” Kathryn asked, moving away from Seven to pick the bouncing girl up into her arms.

Seven’s eyes twinkled with delight watching the two of them.She finished her drink and then went to join them where they had moved to the couch. Selene continued to go on about her day, and Seven allowed it. 

Then as her story began to wind down, Seven cleared her throat. “So young lady, why is it I had to be called away from work today because a certain someone wandered off from where she was supposed to be?” Her eyes glared at her softly.

Selene gulped and she even looked to her other mother as if to help, but Kathryn shook her head. “Hey don’t look at me; I am not happy about this either.”

“Tristan said it would be okay and you wouldn’t mind.”

Seven groaned and gave Kathryn a pointed look, then sharpened her gaze at her daughter. “Just because Tristan said it, that doesn’t make it right…do you hear me?” Right now she really wanted to reprimand his mother over this. Her nostrils flared and suddenly Kathryn’s fingers slid in between her own.

“Relax,” she softly whispered.

Seven gritted her teeth and drew in a breath. “I am trying.”

“Sweetie, could you please talk to me before you go doing that again, even if he said it will be okay? I assure you he doesn’t have all the facts, and even though Tristan believes he knows everything, he’s not as smart as he thinks he is.”

“You’re right,” Selene pouted.

“You could have gotten seriously hurt,” Kathryn continued.

Seven nodded. “Yes, and remember we are a long way from home.”

“I know, but but but…”

“No buts,” Seven grounded out.

“Okay,” Selene agreed and swallowed.

“Okay,” Kathryn said as well, then smiled at her daughter who was still on her lap. “There is something else we want to discuss with you.”

Seven shot her a look, as if she didn’t have to do this yet, but Kathryn just gave her a hopeful smile and squeezed her hand. “It’s okay,” she said throatily.

Seven agreed with a nod and waited for Kathryn. “You see, we wanted to ask you about your thoughts.”

Selene stuck her lip out and her eyes narrowed. “My thoughts?”

“Yeah,” Kathryn drawled, shooting a quick glimpse at her wife. “You see, we were thinking, and well we need your thoughts on it too.”

“On what?” Selene fidgeted on her lap.

Seven’s nose twisted as she knew her daughter’s attention span was collapsing. She inwardly smiled, knowing it wouldn’t be long before she was off Kathryn’s lap and running towards her room. “Selene,” she interjected, her voice hard, but it brought the girl’s attention back to her other mother.

Kathryn once again squeezed Seven’s fingers. She knew she was on edge from whatever occurred earlier today, and she knew that she needed to chill out a little. “Hey, it’s okay.”

Seven kinked her neck and even slouched back against the cushions, then Kathryn leaned into her partner. “So Selene, as we were saying,” she began. “We were wondering how you’d feel about having a sibling?”

“A sibling?” Selene questioned, not sure on the wording, then her eyes brightened. “Oh like….” she grinned. “A brother?” she quipped with enthusiasm.

“Yeah, maybe, or a sister,” Kathryn told her.

Seven shook her head and cleared her throat, causing them both to look at her. ‘What?” Kathryn asked.

“Um, it’s more likely it will be another girl,” she informed her.

Kathryn squinted, as if questioning what Seven was telling her. “Really?”

“Yeah I calculated a probability of 98%, allowing for a 2% margin of error. The laws of science are pretty clear, however, there are enough variable factors to indicate that perhaps there is some other unknown entity at work.” She looked at Kathryn’s perplexed expression and continued. “Um no Y chromosome is presented here Kathryn, unless there is something you want to tell me?”

Snapping out of her thoughts and hearing what Seven was suggesting, she snickered and shook her head. “Nope, nothing ……all woman here.”

Seven quietly growled as her lips got closer to her ear. “Yes you are,” she whispered heatedly.

Kathryn felt that flow through her veins, and she had to ignore the fire that erupted in her belly before it spread further south. Seven caught on and grinned. “Hey Selene, why don’t you go and wash up so we can get dinner prepared?”

“Okay,” she began to bounce to her room, when she stopped. “So, when will I get my baby sister?”

Both Seven and Kathryn grimaced. “Well, honestly,your mother and I still need to talk about that,” Seven told her.

Selene eyed her for a moment as if trying to understand what more they needed to talk about. “But you two are married, so isn’t that what usually comes next,” she said nonchalantly as she skipped off to her room.

“She does have a point,” Kathryn teased.

“She does,” Seven agreed saucily. “As do I.”

“Oh? What would that be?”

“This,” Seven stated, then swept over to embrace her, kissing her passionately as they sunk into the couch.

Janeway nuzzled Seven's ear. “My my ….are you suggesting what I think you are?” she asked in a very provocative tone.

Seven’s eyes grew lidded. “Maybe,” she husked. “Yes,” she now concluded. “But do you?”

Kathryn hesitated only for a moment as her heart flipped in her chest.She knew what she wanted, and somehow it just felt right. Her smile was soft as she drew her wife down the remaining distance and pressed their lips together.The contact was very gentle, yet implicit in its promise, and both women took their time to relish the kiss and how they seemed to melt together.

Janeway, feeling the fire burn through her, reached up, and found the edge of Seven's uniform, un-tucking it so she could slip her hand underneath and feel her soft skin. “God, I wish I could undress you right now,” she hissed against the younger woman’s lips.

Seven lifted a brow and then looked toward Selene’s room. “And I would definitely let you.” 

Kathryn couldn’t help it, she bucked up against her and growled as she began to suck on the side of her wife’s neck, causing Seven’s eyes roll back into her headfor a split second before lowering her mouth and devouring Kathryn’s.

“Yay, I am going to have a baby sister soon.”

Both women snapped apart. “Whaa….” Seven managed to gasp.

“What makes you say that?” Kathryn finally asked, sitting back up.

“Tristan said that’s how babies are made, when two people kiss.”

Seven shot her wife a look of shock, plus amusement. “Um,” Seven tried, but stopped. She squirmed in her seat for a moment then sighed. “I think we need to have a talk.”

Kathryn giggled and then shook her head. “Yeah, like in another five or six years, at least.”

Seven released her breath as relief filled her face. “Oh thank goodness.”

Kathryn chuckled lightly, and pulled Seven and Selene close. “I love you two more than anything, and I’m so grateful for you both. I can’t imagine my life without either of you.”

“We love you too,Mommy,” Selene said. She hugged her, then drifted to Seven. “Don’t we?”

“Very much.” Seven leaned in close, so only Kathryn could hear. “And who knows where we will be in about nine months from now,” she winked.

Kathryn smirked. “Home, because if not, my mother will have both of our asses.”

`~FIN~.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who read, left kudos, and commented.


	21. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you read before 10:50 PM eastern time 5/15 you read my unedited draft. Now up is my fixed work. Sorry for the mess up.

Epilogue

As they materialized onto the planet’s surface, Kathryn drew in a sharp breath and instantly began to run her hands down her body. “Oh phew,” she muttered, looking haphazardly to the heavens as if to thank whatever deity that was up there she was still in one piece.

Seven noticed this, and her ocular implant slowly rose. “You are fine, are you not?” she questioned, amused by her wife’s antics.

“Seven, Darling,” Kathryn began, her tone somewhat degrading. “I know you have that perfect memory of yours, so come on you have to know that I was going to worry.”

Seven dropped the gear she was holding and turned toward her spouse so she could slip her arms around her waist. “And I told you I have been studying nonstop on how to get our transporters through this planet’s storm, but with this ship’s new and advanced technology it really wasn’t a problem.”

Kathryn exhaled and relaxed in her wife’s arms for a moment, then tilted up and kissed her gently before she pulled away to survey her surroundings. “Wow,” she rasped. “I never thought we’d ever be back here,” she said, gazing at the neon pinks that floated around the tranquil waters. “But I’m glad we are, and not outside this little garden area, because I never want to endure that heat again.”

“I agree, it is something isn’t it? Out there no life and we barely survived it, but in here it’s perfect,” she said and noticed a little trepidation on her wife’s features and moved to stand next to her. “Are you having second thoughts?”

Kathryn hesitated as she drew in another breath. “I can’t help it; I mean, I worry for you. I know you had complications with Selene, and I never want you to go through this if it means your life is at risk.” Her voice cracked.

Seven dipped her head, her face sincere. “We have already been through this, and with all the new medical advances, we know it is slim that it will happen again. Plus, I am aware of it, and I will work less in my last trimester.”

“That’s right, and I actually requested that you don’t work at all,” Kathryn firmly voice, her jaw clenched as she sucked in another breath.

A tiny smile filled Seven’s lips and she moved to stand behind the smaller woman and then pulled her closer, her front snuggled against Kathryn’s back. “We agreed before we transported here that this is what we want. We agreed how better this will be…no poking and prodding in some damn lab. We truly are lucky, Kathryn.”

“I know that,” Kathryn huffed, turning in Seven’s arms, as her own snuck around her spouse’s neck. Her blue grey eyes now softened. “I love you Seven, and never doubt that, and that I do want this, I just ….well you know me,” she groaned.

Seven quirked a smile. “I do know you, and I love you, even if you tend to overly worry.” She reached up and cupped Kathryn’s cheek and kissed her, as her other hand traveled down her back and lightly squeezed her other cheek.

Kathryn slightly gasped in their kiss; making her mouth fall open and Seven took advantage of it, her tongue meeting Kathryn’s. She was ready to guide her toward the water and rip the clothes off of her body so she could kiss every inch of her.

“Darling,” Kathryn slipped out panting. “You know we have 8 hours here by ourselves. No need to rush this, and you did say this is our honeymoon since we never had one. Don’t you think I…we… deserve a little romance too?” She now glanced around the area. “We haven’t set anything up yet.” She kicked the hard ground. “I am getting too old to be rolling around naked on this surface.”

Seven smirked and took a few steps away to swipe her com badge. “Captain Janeway to Ensign Wightman?”

“Go ahead, Captain.”

“Please transport the packages I had arranged.”

“Right away.”

In no time there were two large crates that were transported to the surface. “So,” Seven now looked back to her wife. “Why don’t you …” she started, and then removed an item from the bag. “Take a dip, and let that water rush over you while I set up camp for us,” Seven rasped, handing Kathryn a soft robe.

Kathryn took the garment in her hands and her eyes went wide as she noticed right away what it was. “Where did you get this?”

“I’ve been saving it for you…..I had a friend of mine deliver it to me after our night at the farmhouse. I noticed how much you liked mine,” she winked.

Kathryn ran her hands over the fine silk and then held it against her chest. “This is a lovely gift, Seven, thank you.” She drew close to her wife and kissed the blonde’s lips.

“You’re welcome, but I’d rather you really thank me…uh later….. when I see you in it.”

Kathryn felt that flow thorough her. Normally they were somewhat like this, but being on this surface again, the sensual, sexual sensations were already starting to stir deeply in her, and she wasn’t even in the water yet. She swallowed and turned to go and undress when she pivoted back. “Are you sure you don’t want any help?”

Seven slowly shook her head. “I will be joining you shortly, Kathryn. Besides I am Borg, and I am pretty sufficient.”

Kathryn haughtily grinned, “Yes you are,” she said sultry, then puckered her lips for her wife and blew her a kiss. “See you soon Darling.”

In Seven’s absence Kathryn undressed and laid out her robe to slip on once she returned from the water. She then slowly began to glide into the shimmering lagoon. She thought about their future, and what they would need to do to prepare themselves if this worked a second time.

Once again Kathryn was starting to get second thoughts when a blaze of hot flesh and quiet grunts of erotic breaths mingled around her as with twisted flashes of Seven making love to her floated through her memory. Her fingertips felt hot as they touched her lips, desire instantly rushing heavily through her veins.

She was so hot, almost feverish with need, and the coolness of this water was no match for it. Her insides quivered, and the need in her rose so high she wasn’t sure she could come down from it. She moaned as treacherous fingers began to slip down the slope of her chest, then eased further south where she needed them so desperately.

“Kathryn,” she heard her name like a siren, pulling her with such a force that she was certain to drown if she didn’t answer.

Before Kathryn could find her wife, soft lips touched the side of her neck and with it she couldn’t contain the way her body shivered. “Don’t tell me you were going to start without me?” she groaned, as she continued to kiss and suck at Kathryn’s exposed skin.

Kathryn’s ragged breath came out in short bursts; she couldn’t believe how much more she wanted this woman. Everything seemed so elevated, and she didn’t think it was possible to want someone this much, yet she never wanted it to stop.

“I’m,” she barely got out before spinning around in the water so she could gaze upon her wife. “Seeevvvn,” she exhaled, nostrils flaring. “I need…”

Seven knew exactly what she needed, and she was beyond ready before she got into the water. Now she was afraid she might implode right there if she didn’t have this woman, this beautiful being that she was now free to call her wife. 

She would have acknowledged how happy she was if every nerve in her body wasn’t on fire. “I love you, Kathryn, I always have,” she scarcely breathed. “And always will.”

“Oh, Darling,” Kathryn said wanting to tell her more, but it seemed she couldn’t find her words. She just slipped her lips over her spouse’s in a bruising kiss, making the fire that burned inside her flare up higher, and when Seven moaned into her mouth, she almost came right then. “We bett..ree,” she managed, before getting swept up by Seven’s mouth and arms.

Kathryn wanted Seven to consume her, to be intertwined together for eternity, yet as she felt her inside of her…… and their bodies moving in unison….. it was still not enough.

Feeling the pulsating quivers of her climax, which was strong, but not strong enough. Somehow Seven sensed it, because seconds later she was being held in her arms as they emerged from the water to their makeshift camp. 

She didn’t even get to enjoy how romantic Seven had made it for her; all that mattered was this moment in time, the two of them making love until the fire within them slowed, because she knew it would never burn out.

……

Only drifting between wake, and sleep Seven smiled against the softness of Kathryn’s upper chest and throat and quietly groaned with contentment. She inhaled her wife’s scent as she lightly placed a kiss to the skin that still held a sheen of sweat to it.

“Seven,” Kathryn murmured, fingers drifting idly down her wife’s back. Lazily she sighed, “I never thought we could do better than we did after we got married, but I gotta say, there is something about being here on this planet.”

Seven scooted up so she could place a small kiss to Kathryn’s lips. “I agree,” she mentioned her eyes absorbing how her wife looked in this moment, then continued to rain kisses along her wife’s jaw.

“I never thought we’d top 10, but my god we did.”

Seven now turned somewhat and moved up on her elbow to peer down at her spouse. “And we did it with a little over 5 hours to spare.”

Kathryn rolled on her side so she could shimmy up and look Seven in her eyes, her own now looked puzzled. “I feel famished, yet I don’t know if I really need to eat,” she playfully winked.

Not catching on, Seven began to explain. “It is the atmosphere and the water,” she told her logically, her eyes drifting to the lagoon.

Kathryn grinned and gently reached out to run her thumb down Seven’s jaw, then softly pulled her gaze back to her own. “Actually, I believe it is you, My Love.”

“Me?” Seven’s brow dipped. “But I can’t give you what this…..”

Kathryn’s grin grew as her wife began to argue that it was the planet doing this to her not herself, so instead of listening to her rant, she just leaned in and shut her up with a deep, lingering kiss.

“Kathryn,” Seven muttered against her mouth.

“Shhhhh,” Kathryn commanded, nipping at Seven’s lips. “Trust me, all you.”

Seven now berated herself for taking this long to figure out what Kathryn was telling her. She gripped her wife’s hip, pulling it flush against her body as she kissed her hard.

Kathryn moaned, finding very quickly that nothing would quench this desire she had for Seven, but the great thing about that was she didn’t feel she needed to quench it, ever. Also, being here on this planet did have its perks; she felt younger and invigorated, and she wasn’t sore or even tired. She even wondered if she could die making love too much, but in that moment, it didn’t really matter…… especially now as she felt Seven slide on top of her body.

Her breath shuddered as she felt their wetness once again mingle together, hips moving, breaths quickening, and once again it didn’t take long before they both moaned out in ecstasy. 

Panting, Kathryn had her head cocked back, as she looked up at the crazy stars in the night’s sky as pinks of neon danced overhead. Well, that makes 12 between us. I can’t wait to see how many more we get.

For a moment she forgot all about why they were there in the first place, but when she heard her stomach growl and Seven peered down at her and laughed, she remembered. Could Seven already be with my child? The thought blew her mind, yet just like that it made her wetter than she had been before. She was ready for round 13 when….

“I believe I shall prepare you some dinner,” Seven said, as she began to move off her wife’s body and stand up.

Kathryn wouldn’t have dared let her leave her arms, but her stomach rumbled again. “I suppose,” she uttered, her face relaxed. Nothing but joy shined though her eyes as she turned on her side to watch her naked wife prepare her something to eat.

Soon Kathryn was slipping on her robe to enjoy the meal Seven had prepared for her. She had to kiss her before she could even attempt to put anything else in her mouth. As she began to eat, she couldn’t believe how good it was. She had eaten this before, it was one of her favorite cuisines that her spouse had prepared for her, but this time it was so much more, and she couldn’t stop the moan that slip through her lips.

Seven smirked. “That good, is it?”

“It is to die for, Seven,” Kathryn relayed, as she forked more of it. “What did you do different?”

“Nothing,” Seven told her seriously.

Blinking, Kathryn shook her head. “Really?”

“Yes, I believe it has to do with…” she paused and raised a hand and tossed it around the area. “Well, where we are.”

Kathryn absorbed this and slowly raised an eyebrow. “Wow, I mean, if this got out, I mean, all of this.” She shook her head and dropped her fork on her plate. “I mean, the ramification of it all. People go to war over less, Seven,” Kathryn said. “It’s kind of like we stumbled on the fountain of youth or something.”

“That’s why it shall never get out.”

It took Kathryn a moment to agree. “So, what do we tell the crew about our findings?” she exhaled, her voice on the edge of worry. “And then when you show up pregnant, how are we supposed to keep this from them?”

“I have thought on it,” Seven began. “And it’s simple…all done in a lab, of course.”

“But then they would wonder why we didn’t wait until we returned home.”

“We didn’t want to wait,” Seven simply said, then reached out and took Kathryn’s hand in her own. “Besides, we have no idea if it will work again. So, let’s not worry about this now,” she breathed, eyes soft. “Okay?”

“Alright,” Kathryn agreed. She knew that there would be a time that this may come up, but if she and Seven were on the same page, then she also knew nothing could stop them.

Seven now moved around where she was sitting and pulled Kathryn up and into her arms. “So my Captain, how about we cool ourselves off?”

Kathryn grinned. “Oh, what do you have in mind?”

“I think you know.”

Kathryn glanced at the water than back to her spouse. “Eh, I may have an idea, but I’d rather you show me.”

“I can help with that.” Seven’s eyes were serious, lecherous even, before she slid the garment off of Kathryn’s arms and dipped her head a lot lower than the ex Admiral expected. She sucked in a trembling breath as she felt Seven’s lips begin to explore down her chest and even further south, so south she could barely stand after she was finished. Thank god that her wife noticed and swooped her up into her arms and carried her to the lagoon, which Kathryn secretly loved. 

………..

It had been weeks since they left their favorite planet, and the further away they got from it, the closer they were getting to home. They hadn’t had the time or the need to see if Seven was with child, buy they both wanted to know, however they were also nervous. So instead of ripping the band aid off……. they avoided.

But now, Seven had been somewhat injured on an away mission, in fact it was so minuscule and she about didn’t go in, but Kathryn insisted, just to make sure. So now she was sitting on the examining table and nervously sighed as she warily eyed the EMH. “Doctor,” she began, and Kathryn’s eyes went wide with the reality of what was about to happen.

Seven caught the look and tilted her head. “You don’t want to know?”

Kathryn shrugged and blew out her breath. “I do, and I have no idea why I am so nervous about it,” she groaned. “Yes I do, then I can get you to stop being foolish with those away missions.”

Seven reached out and took Kathryn’s hand. “I understand, but you do know this is part of my job.”

“It is not,” Kathryn clipped.

Seven snorted as a slow smile spilt her lips. “Okay, so how many away missions did the famous Captain Kathryn Janeway go on?” Seven retorted. “None? Was it?”

“Oh fine, you made your point. But I still don’t like it, and I will dislike it even more once I know you are with…” she trailed off as the medical officer was giving her a strange look.

“EMH, I need you to give me a pregnancy test.”

“What?” the doctor snapped from shock.

“You heard me.”

The EMH nodded somewhat and began to prepare her patient. Kathryn’s fingers were tightly laced within Seven’s and she stood basically between Seven’s thighs as both women were excited and anxious. 

Seven peered down and really looked at her wife and couldn’t help smile as she thought back on the day she learned about Selene. She was so scared then, unprepared about their future. Now there wasn’t any of that, she felt a little melancholy that Kathryn wasn’t there the first time, but she was there with her now and she reveled in it.

Soon the doctor came back into the room. “I have your results; would you like me to tell you…or would you rather…”

Seven cut her off. “Tell us,” she commanded.

The EMH cleared her throat. “Your results are negative; you are not with child, Seven.”

The doctor noticed the two women looking into one another’s eyes, tears evident in both, and she knew she was somewhere she didn’t belong and quietly excused herself.

Kathryn swallowed in a throat that had suddenly gone dry. She felt that knowing ache in her throat, and hated it. She saw how sad Seven looked, and it took everything in her not to let her tears fall. She knew she needed to be strong as she cupped her cheek. “I suppose it wasn’t meant to be,” she rasped.

Seven knew she needed to be strong in that moment; she needed to there for Kathryn, her wife who had held so much hope for them, for this. She inhaled a sharp breath as quietly as she could. “I am okay, and I am just distraught that this didn’t happen. I don’t understand what could have gone wrong.”

Kathryn pulled her close and hugged her, she needed it as well. “We will just be a unit of three, Darling…and I am okay with that.”

“Are you?” Seven asked, feeling her throat constrict, because in all these weeks, she never would have thought otherwise, she was so sure she was with child….. hell she even quietly would talk to her stomach as if she was carrying their embryo.

Kathryn rested her forehead against Seven’s. “Like I’ve told you, Seven, all I need is you and Selene. I promise.”

Seven nodded against her wife’s brow, and that’s when she noticed the tears falling, all though she just didn’t know exactly where from. She folded her arms around the smaller form and squeezed her. She knew they would be fine, but today, right here and now, they would be sad for something they hoped to add.

…………..

Months closer to the Alpha Quadrant, the ship’s crew had just encountered an uncharted planet, and they even gathered a few new things from it. One in which Kathryn could not stop indulging in. It was frozen and sweet and as they got ready to break orbit, the former Admiral pouted.

Seven laughed, but thought she looked adorable just the same. “How many did you stole away?”

Kathryn made a face as an eyebrow raised. “Um,” she smiled and shrugged. “Honestly, not enough,” she giggled lightly.

“You really like those, don’t you?”

“Oh my god, I have no words to describe to you how yummy they are, and how it feels on my tongue, sliding down my throat…” she trailed off, closing her eyes as she moaned.

Seven stared at her and noticed how Kathryn’s eyes shined with delight as she described eating her new found favorite. Her lips looked somewhat plumper and when she licked them slow and moaned, like she was doing right now, it made her breath catch with desire. She couldn’t help it, she needed Kathryn in her arms, protocols or not.

She pulled her flush with a jolt, and Kathryn squealed, totally caught off guard. “Seven!”

Seven was turned on and wanted so much to take her to their quarters. “Do you know how beautiful you look right now?” she husked as she dipped her head so her mouth could taste those lips she was just staring at.

Kathryn ripped it away, and her face went from a glowing pink to greenish shade of white. “Sev…” she spewed as she slapped a hand over her mouth. “What did you have for lunch?”

“It was a Crensonuzum stew of some sort. Really tasty, actually. Why?”

Kathryn heaved once, then twice before she ran off toward the nearest wash facility. Puzzled, yet worried, Seven followed and sure enough she heard Kathryn spilling her frozen dessert.

She softly knocked. “You okay, Kathryn?”

A few more noises nothing that Seven could not comprehend, sp she ordered the computer to bypass the lock and soon she was holding Kathryn’s hair back. “Maybe you had too many,” she suggested.

Kathryn finally slumped back on the cool surface, and Seven flushed for her. “Maybe, but but but ..…” she slightly made a face as she lolled her head back against the wall. “I don’t know.”

Seven ran her hand over her brow and noticed her temperature was nothing out of the ordinary. “You feel okay, but maybe we should have you looked at, just in case it may be a bought of food poisoning.”

Kathryn suddenly began to cry, and Seven’s eyes went alarmingly wide. She wasn’t sure what to do except put her arm around her. “Hey, it is okay, quick fix with a hypo spray.”

“No,” Kathryn choked. “That means I will have to throw out the rest of those desserts,” she sobbed her face now in her hands.

Seven watched this, and was now certain she might have dropped into a vortex and was now in an alternative universe. In all her history with this woman, she had never witnessed her this distraught, especially over food.

“Sweetie,” Seven tried. “Come on, let’s get you to medical and make sure you’re okay.”

“Okay,” Kathryn agreed, and Seven was grateful she didn’t try to resist. “I just hope I don’t do that again on our way.” She pointed to the toilet.

“And if you do, I’ll be right with you.”

Kathryn happened to make it all the way to sick bay before she had another mishap in the bathroom, and Seven was right there with her just like she promised. The EMH didn’t have time to give her anything for the nausea, but now she was lying on the examining table. She had been sitting, but she felt tired, and she just wanted to lie down.

The doctor ran a few tests, then looked puzzled and then scratched her head as she looked to the Captain, then to the Captain’s wife, then back and forth one more time. She even ran a few more tests, before Seven noticed this bizarre behavior, and it was not something that was she was programmed to do.

“Doctor!” The Captain snapped. “What is it?”

The doctor peered down at Kathryn, a worried gaze clearly evident in her features, so much so, that the older woman decided she needed to be sitting up to hear this. “Um, maybe you should step out of the room,” she relayed to the Captain.

“Excuse me, she is my wife, and I have a right to be here, I will want to know, especially if she is ill,” Seven commanded.

The EMH looked over at the redhead to make sure it was okay, and Kathryn rolled her eyes. “It’s fine, we have no secrets,” she voiced loudly. “Get on with it. Am I dying or what?”

“Kathryn!” Seven glared. “Don’t say that.”

“No, actually you are rather healthy, which is good for someone your age, and in the condition you are in,” the doctor told her.

Kathryn began to nod, then made a face at the EMH. “My condition? What condition? I don’t have a condition.”

The doctor remained poised as she drew closer. “Well, my dear, you do now.”

“Oh no,” Kathryn groaned. “What do I got doc….wait don’t tell me let me guess. Heart disease, osteoporosis, no wait, I know… diabetes. Makes since, I mean I have been overloading on my sugar intake,” she pointed out, making a joke since she was actually really nervous about what the docotor was going to tell her.

Seven knew this, knew her wife, and went to her, slowly shaking her head. “Hey stop that, she said you were really healthy.” Seven eyed her and hoped her hearing was still top notch.

“She is, but like I said there is something.”

“Well yeah, that’s why I am here, been puking …remember?”

“How could I forget?” The doctor said. “Anyway, since you two are married, I am concerned about the conception of this, but my tests don’t lie.” She smiled. “So, Mrs. Janeway, the condition I was talking about is….well, you are pregnant.”

Kathryn’s eyes went wide, as did Seven’s and they both narrowed in on each other. “What?” the older woman choked. “I am what?”

Seven blinked and then dropped her gaze to Kathryn’s midsection. “Oh my god, it did work,” she blurted.

“No, no no no…” Kathryn breathed. “I’m too old to be pregnant; there is no way.”

“Actually, more and more women at your age are having children, and I can assure you that everything usually goes fine,” the doctor informed her.

“But my eggs ….I mean…” she faded off, then placed a hand over her face as she let what this EMH was telling her sink in. “Oh my god….I’m pregnant.”

Seven looked to the doctor. “Can you give us a minute?”

“Yes, Captain.” She left the room, leaving the two expecting mothers alone.

Seven moved in close and wrapped her arms around her wife. “So…” she began, then paused trying to come up with the right words in this moment. “Um, well, I guess I should ask…… are you okay? And I don’t mean just physically, but are you okay about being with child, my child?” She was smiling, she couldn’t help it, she was happy about this. She had given up believing that this would happen, but apparently now it was back on.

Kathryn inhaled then finally looked up at her wife, and the joy that shined through her blues eyes couldn’t be missed. It eased her anxiety of this situation some….but she was still concerned about it. “I think I am okay.” she said flatly. “I never thought it would be me. I mean, why me?” she now expressed. “I’m old.”

Seven rolled her eyes. “You are not old, not at all,” she growled. “Trust me.”

Kathryn looked down at her stomach and sighed as she pressed a hand over it. “Wow,” she breathed, then finally smiled. “Well hello there, little one. I guess I should blame you for making me eat all those sugary treats,” she said airily, then suddenly faltered and looked distressed. “Oh my god…. no wonder I gained weight, and to think I was thinking it was because I thought I was going through early stages of menopause.”

Seven chuckled lightly. “Nah, you’re too young.” She winked and went to cover Kathryn’s hand with her own, which was still on her abdomen, but hesitated.

Kathryn wouldn’t let her and snatched up Seven’s hand and placed it over hers. Then she smiled again as she shrugged. “I guess it’s back on…..Captain.” She leaned in and kissed her wife. “So, you ready to be a daddy this time?” she played.

Seven grinned. “Only with you.”


End file.
